la, la, la still not vacuumed, but link to this comment on the Nurse- IN
, and wait till the clip is over to see what the anchorwoman says about it!
And on the feminism breastfeeding this:
I am a women' studies major and midwife...right now I am watching the first of my educated peer group have babies as most people I know from school still have not at age 30...the one who did hget pregnant first really resented having her programming career side tracked, they got a vasectomy to insure it will never happen again, but she loves her baby. I gotta say, I think our babies need us and breastfeeding is natures way of keeping baby on the body that first year. I have been reading Rahima Baldwins "You are your Childs First Teacher" and she quotes a pediatrician who will not back down on the stance that mothers are best to parent babies, followed by other family members. I know this instictively...my baby needs me now and she's not going to be over it any time soon! I am really struggling with what I will do with my work come December when the midwife covering my job leaves- (I am looking for someone to hire! Calling all LMs!)- but I am reading all the Waldorf stuff about babies incarnating and the special window of a baby and ages three to seven, and I feel irreplaceable. I have no good family options, its me or dh to care for baby and thats all I am comfortable with for the early years. Some school for fun only, like montessori or waldorf 3 hours a morning a few days a week, but...anyway, I am unsure what that will mean for me. We are living very modestly at the moment to make me being at home work, and gratefully dh can make enough to keep us afloat at that level. My cousin who gave birth tonight will have her baby in day care from 8 weeks on, and I know it will break her heart, she doesn't want to do it. And honestly, the main reason she has to work is to pay off the huge loan she got to go to school so she can work (so it's almost like indentured servitude to her plans), and they live in a really big house, have 2 new cars, and I just wonder how it will go for her. My other friend who just had a baby 8 weeks ago is on the professional track in Washingotn DC doing stuff in International Trade, and I know she wants to stay with her baby, and I can't wait to hear what she's going to do. I sent an e-mail to her and used the work account that sent an automatic message "so and so is out of the office.." I wonder how she will balance her acheivements, and the fact that her current ranking and investment in her career is equal to her husband's, who is in the same field, with her motherhood which I know is so important to her. How will it feel as he gets ahead if she chooses to be home? She was my best friend from 6-8 years old, and we both had stay at home moms and I think we both really value that looking back-nothign like having a mom to be brownie leader or sew a platypus costume when you are 7
right Andy! I can't imagine not being there for my baby, or young child in those ways, but am unsure what to do with my work and a business thats taken me 7 years to create that ironically, is all about mothers and babies! That is demanding, because babies can't wait and won't conform to decent hours and time frames when being born! I know I can't work like I did or like my replacement is- its weird to see someone be as frazzled as I was, to observe how she is starting to look rundown after walking in my shoes just 5 months, even though she has more help and support than I ever had! ANyway, I think the questions of feminism and breastfeeding brought up in the article are really feminism and motherhood. MArtin said tonight "I think my parenting philosophy is summed up by a quote I read "He's your son, you're his life" " He was like, to an adult obligations to a kid are just another task to some degree, but we are their world....This was really poignant and sad cause MArtin's dad was not there for him, he had another kid with someone else and moved far away to the states, leaving young MArtin with a depressed and cranky mother. He remembers sitting with model airplanes, never finishing them cause he realized what he really was wanting was to do them with his dad...how sad is that...I don't want to
not be there. I feel like the most feminsit thing I could do is really help cultivate a secure, happy, functional person to bloom into the world. I'm just not sure what that means for my work vs. just being there. I also love the quote "Children need interesting mothers", and want to balance my passion of helping women have sane births with being a sane mother. It would be INSANE and ironic to sacrfice my own mothering to be a midwife! But, I have the local birth center, if I close it it just means more women to be treated like total crap by some of the abusive docs, or just be subjected to illogical hospital policies that ruin their births even if they do have a nice midwife there. I could have others work it, sell it, who know the infinite number sof way i can try to invent my life....ANyway, i think all we can do is live our questions out loud...because that is how we learn, and most importantly, that is how we avoid nagging house work! Heidi