Catnip we are having an ant problem too. Ugh I hate ants. Nothing we do is getting rid of them and I think I've just about given up and decided that they don't really eat very much and I'm gonna try to ignore them
Y'all might not want to come eat at my house any time soon!
Karen, I didn't mention this before but almost two years ago my dad fell off a ladder and had a pretty severe head injury. He had to do a lot of rehab because he was in bed for about a month before he could get up again and he really couldn't walk at first or anything. Anyway it took about 6 months from the accident to be basically normal again and it was really frustrating for him, but he did get there. I know its not quite the same thing, but actually I think there are a lot of similarities..he had to build new pathways to do some things. Hang in there, both you and your dad, it will get better sooner than it feels right now.
Annie, if he's not tantruming because he wants to nurse than nursing isn't giving in, its just comforting him. One thing that I found helped when I was a teacher for a group of two year olds was to give the kids the words they needed. Like "wow, you are mad she took your toy, you wanted that toy!" If I didn't know why they were having a tantrum I'd just say "Wow, you are mad, really really mad" It kind of helped to do this in a sort of emphatic voice. If they calmed down a little I would try saying, "boy I would sure like to help you solve this" or something like that. I know the prevailing wisdom is not to give the tantrum any attention at all, and sometimes I think you do have to go that route with some kids, but I also think there are ways to model appropriate responses to frustration without it meaning that you've "given in". I'd say about half the time saying "I'd like to help you" got me a kid that was back in control of him/herself. You sound like you have really good perspective on it at least, I know it would drive me NUTS sometimes when the kids would throw multiple tantrums in a day. It usually helped to remind myself that as lousy as it was to be the teacher watching the tantrum, it must feel even worse to be the kid having it. I hope I can remember that when its Japhet throwing the tantrums!
Michelle, crossing my fingers that she gains weight.
I know there were other things I wanted to respond to! Its so hard to remember it all.
Today we went to the family center and I was talking with the woman that runs the parent group about having been an educator and the person who hands OUT the pamphlets to parents and how it feels to now be on the receiving end. Its funny because I really do need the pamphlets still, its so easy to forget things when its your own kid. I was thinking that again when I read the "things to say instead of no" list above, I am so good at saying these kinds of things in a classroom situation where I'm "on" but I've already noticed me saying "don't" and "no" to Japhet much more than I want to. Right now I'm mostly doing it jokingly but I realized he's still going to learn what it means, and I really still should use my better language skills. It never occurred to me how much harder it was going to be to do when it was my own child and I was just more likely to be not thinking before I say something. So much is "don't" at the moment, he just wants to play with everything and most of the world isn't safe for a six month old it seems.
Things that Japhet wanted today that he couldn't have:
Cherries, shopping receipt, plastic bags at the grocery store, my hair owww, my shoes to chew on, the cap to my water bottle, the trays from our sushi lunch, fuzz that was on the floor, the newspaper, napkins, the cat.
He's so undistractible, he knows the difference between toys and real things and he wants the real things. I've had to get really creative figuring out what real things are more or less baby safe to distract him with especially now that he's starting to creep around.