What is the worst/dumbest thing anyone has ever said to you about parenting stuff? - Page 123 - Mothering Forums

Forum Jump: 
Reply
 
Thread Tools
#3661 of 5048 Old 02-08-2007, 08:30 PM
 
Harmony96's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Lash-tastic Texas
Posts: 3,131
Mentioned: 10 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 20 Post(s)
Quote:
i don't have the courage to say something, although it would be tempting.
Oh I know! I could fill up a WHOLE big thread about combacks I wish I could say. Not just about parenting, but about anything in general. Hmmm maybe one of these days I should start a thread like that in TAO.

Ok hmm better get this back on topic before I post... Oh when DH and I told my mom (before we were even trying to get pregnant) that we planned to cloth diaper, she was like "we'll see how long THAT will last." But now that I'm doing it, it's just another load of laundry, really. And even people who disposable diaper have a bunch of laundry w/ a new baby, anyway, right?

Andrea , child of God, wife of Tim , mama of L, B, J, J

I'm a Younique Presenter. Come check it out!!
Want to get paid daily and start earning as soon as 24 hours after sign up? Join my team!
Harmony96 is offline  
#3662 of 5048 Old 02-08-2007, 11:26 PM
 
sapphire_chan's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 27,769
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lady Lilya View Post
I know most of you will say "why did you even go to an OB?"
Actually, I was waiting for the part of the post where you found a different OB to be your backup.
sapphire_chan is offline  
#3663 of 5048 Old 02-09-2007, 03:11 AM
 
AnnieMarie's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: South Africa
Posts: 774
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
We live in what by many is considered to be a third world coutnry, though our private medical care is very much first world. I went through two OB's, before I finally put my foot down and told DH we would be HBing with a midwife and went to my small town GP as a back-up. He does deliveries and surgery from a 3rd world state hospital which is BF and kangaroo care friendly and IMHO far better than the pvt care, anyhow before I get too off topic... I had an OB tell me that he did not belive that I would manage natural labour without pain meds - this was my second child - the first was born at home - naturally. In his opinion women are just not capable of having natural birth and should have c-sections.: I am glad to say that I twisted DH's arm and we got our HB even though we live on a farm 'in the middle of nowhere'

ANNIE - Crunchy WAHM to 2 boys & baby girl born 12July08 ~From contentment with little comes happiness â African Proverb
AnnieMarie is offline  
#3664 of 5048 Old 02-10-2007, 02:39 AM
 
awinkler's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Posts: 178
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by MelissaEvans View Post
I've heard this one too. I guess I'm kinda lucky in a way since DS hasn't started using words yet (20mo). I guess people think they should punish a child for learning new skills - these are the same people who don't recognize that by nuzzling, rooting, crying, sucking on fists, and so forth, a baby *is* asking to nurse. Just because a child can't speak, doesn't mean s/he can't communicate. DS pats my chest to tell me he wants to nurse; he knocks on the door to tell me he wants to go outside to play; he hugs and kisses me to tell me he loves me.
YES! I agree!!! Communication has lots of forms. My DS is almost 8 mo old, and when we're sitting on the floor playing, he'll turn towards me, and bury his head in my chest. Subtle
awinkler is offline  
#3665 of 5048 Old 02-10-2007, 08:55 AM
 
BunchaCrunch's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 53
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
My family are all very mainstream and practically worship doctors, so the fact that I was using a midwife during my pregnancy did not sit well with any of them. Throughout my entire pregnancy, I had to deal with all sorts of snarky remarks, but several things said to me following my daughter's birth were very ridiculous.

My daughter was born four weeks early and despite the fact that she was thankfully quite large and very healthy for her gestational age, my mother had the nerve to tell everybody she knew that my daughter was born early due to my having used a midwife. She even had the nerve to go on & on about how "shocked and appalled" she was that my midwife was "allowed" to "deliever" my baby considering she was "very premature". She kept insisting that she had heard of many babies who died at the hands of midwives from being born too early. *head meets desk* I told her that their are studies that prove contrary and even pointed out that obs are not trained in vaginal birth, but are actually surgeons, so if anything they would be the ones to "kill my baby", but she told me I was just being unreasonable and ignorant.

My daughter was found to have a small heart murmur when she was first born. Her pediatrician did not think it was serious, but were sent us to a pediatric cardiologist just to be sure. The cardiologist confirmed what the ped had thought and when I called my parents to tell them the news, they proceeded to tell me how this "terrible defect" was my fault for using a midwife rather than a doctor and keep referencing how her heart murmur is result of her prematurity, which is not the case. I have explained to them that a heart murmur is just something that can happen regardless of when a baby is born, prenatal care, and everything else, but they will not hear of it. They keep telling everybody they know about her heart murmur, despite the fact that it can no longer be heard and is not a cause of concern with her ped!

Not only are my family anti-midwife, but they are also non-breastfeeders and are very hostile towards breastfeeding. When my parents came to visit right after my daughter's birth, we were experiencing some nursing problems and I was pumping to both nourish my daughter and protect my milk supply while we worked with a great LC on correcting the issue. During their visit, my mother kept making comments about how I must feel like a cow and how she would never do THAT with formula being so much easier. She even attempted to talk me into using formula rather than continuing pumping and insisted that formula was "just as healthy, if not moreso" than breastmilk.

After our nursing issues were finally resolved, I had another visit with my parents in which I was expected to nurse my baby in a spare bedroom at their home, along with putting a blanket over her head so nobody would "see anything". As if this hostility were not bad enough, my mom kept making comments about how awful it must be to have to do THAT so long and how I must wish nursing my little girl was as easy as "pumping gas into a car".

I am sadly sure that more stories will come about as time goes on, but these are just a few of the worst so far.
BunchaCrunch is offline  
#3666 of 5048 Old 02-10-2007, 08:58 AM
 
BunchaCrunch's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 53
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I forgot about this gem.

When I first told my mother that I was pregnant, she asked me what my doctor said when they realized my age. : I have no idea what she meant by that! I am twenty one, have been married for two years, and my husband and I support ourselves so what on earth could the issue be?? :
BunchaCrunch is offline  
#3667 of 5048 Old 02-10-2007, 11:52 AM
 
ramlita's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: eating pesto in Vermont
Posts: 3,011
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Oh, man, Buncha.

How old was your mom when she had her first??

DIYer mama to DD 11/00 and DS 6/05- both intact, naturally!
...missing Mothering Magazine...
 
ramlita is offline  
#3668 of 5048 Old 02-10-2007, 01:37 PM
 
beanbean's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 791
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by BunchaCrunch View Post
My daughter was born four weeks early and despite the fact that she was thankfully quite large and very healthy for her gestational age, my mother had the nerve to tell everybody she knew that my daughter was born early due to my having used a midwife. She even had the nerve to go on & on about how "shocked and appalled" she was that my midwife was "allowed" to "deliever" my baby considering she was "very premature". She kept insisting that she had heard of many babies who died at the hands of midwives from being born too early. *head meets desk* I told her that their are studies that prove contrary and even pointed out that obs are not trained in vaginal birth, but are actually surgeons, so if anything they would be the ones to "kill my baby", but she told me I was just being unreasonable and ignorant.

My daughter was found to have a small heart murmur when she was first born. Her pediatrician did not think it was serious, but were sent us to a pediatric cardiologist just to be sure. The cardiologist confirmed what the ped had thought and when I called my parents to tell them the news, they proceeded to tell me how this "terrible defect" was my fault for using a midwife rather than a doctor and keep referencing how her heart murmur is result of her prematurity, which is not the case. I have explained to them that a heart murmur is just something that can happen regardless of when a baby is born, prenatal care, and everything else, but they will not hear of it. They keep telling everybody they know about her heart murmur, despite the fact that it can no longer be heard and is not a cause of concern with her ped!
I told this to my DH and he commented that he would have said, "Get out of my house now and don't contact us until you're ready to apologize." And DH is a very tactful, thoughtful guy.

Hon, your family is not "mainstream" - they're a bit insane.

Blessed Mama to 4 and expecting one more!
beanbean is offline  
#3669 of 5048 Old 02-10-2007, 04:42 PM
 
cellarstella's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: SE Portland, OR (Brooklyn)
Posts: 2,516
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
What does that even mean, "you're not going to last long as a parent" ? What, I'm going to keel over and die because I carry my kid a lot? Sounds like we know a lot of people affected with severe cases of not-thinking-before-speaking.

I'm a proud mama of two girls! 4/30/06 Madeline, 09/25/08 Amelia
--**I'm here to share my mistakes and learn from yours**--
cellarstella is offline  
#3670 of 5048 Old 02-10-2007, 08:49 PM
 
Lady Lilya's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Durham, NC
Posts: 3,721
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by sapphire_chan View Post
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lady Lilya
I know most of you will say "why did you even go to an OB?"
Actually, I was waiting for the part of the post where you found a different OB to be your backup.
At this point, I can't stomach the idea of going to another one!

I really liked her assistant. I hope I get more chances to talk to her. She is training to be a midwife.

Well, my insurance plan changes in June. Perhaps at that time, when the network changes, I will feel up to another search.

At the time I made the appointment, I hadn't found this website yet. Next time, I am getting recommendations from my tribe.

Leigh, mama to Rostislav homeborn Aug 9 2007, and Oksana homeborn Feb 24 2011.
Lady Lilya is offline  
#3671 of 5048 Old 02-10-2007, 08:59 PM
 
jayayenay's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2003
Posts: 1,612
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Just got back from a walk with dh and ds (who was on my back in the ergo, wearing a long-sleeved shirt, sweater, pants, babylegs, socks, and shooshoos). It's probably in the low 50s out, overcast but dry. A little chilly, but a nice temperature for an evening walk. We passed a woman walking 2 dogs, and she shivered and said, "Ooh, it's so nasty out! Why doesn't he (ds) have a hat?" I couldn't even answer her, because she kept blabbering about how she's sick and she had to walk the dogs but it's so awful out here and she hopes it (the beautiful weather?) ends soon. When she stopped talking, I told her she should put on a hat.
jayayenay is offline  
#3672 of 5048 Old 02-10-2007, 09:35 PM
 
turnipmama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 722
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by AnnieMarie View Post
We live in what by many is considered to be a third world coutnry, though our private medical care is very much first world. I went through two OB's, before I finally put my foot down and told DH we would be HBing with a midwife and went to my small town GP as a back-up. He does deliveries and surgery from a 3rd world state hospital which is BF and kangaroo care friendly and IMHO far better than the pvt care, anyhow before I get too off topic... I had an OB tell me that he did not belive that I would manage natural labour without pain meds - this was my second child - the first was born at home - naturally. In his opinion women are just not capable of having natural birth and should have c-sections.: I am glad to say that I twisted DH's arm and we got our HB even though we live on a farm 'in the middle of nowhere'
What on earth did he think women did before modern medicine??!!
turnipmama is offline  
#3673 of 5048 Old 02-10-2007, 10:06 PM
 
Lohagrace's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Headed for he** in a handbasket
Posts: 493
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Oh, i remember another time a friend and i did a circus protest with our babies on our backs. it was chilly, but they were wrapped up pretty well. its not like babies have a hard time telling you when they are not happy!! anyway, several strangers were like "those poor babies, you're protesting the elephants having to do the circus, but those babies don't have a choice about being on your back out here." comments to that effect : yeah, babies HATE to be worn on their mother's backs. its like baby slavery what we are doing! i guess i should ask my 6 month old what her choice is. i guess they think it would have been better if they had been in a stroller or playpen or something.

L married to J 8 years. Parents to 6 y.o. dd and 3 y.o. ds :nana
Veggie Family
Lohagrace is offline  
#3674 of 5048 Old 02-11-2007, 01:25 AM
 
Kateana's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 560
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lady Lilya View Post
At this point, I can't stomach the idea of going to another one!

I really liked her assistant. I hope I get more chances to talk to her. She is training to be a midwife.

Well, my insurance plan changes in June. Perhaps at that time, when the network changes, I will feel up to another search.

At the time I made the appointment, I hadn't found this website yet. Next time, I am getting recommendations from my tribe.
Maybe your midwife has a backup that she works with? Or one that her other clients can refer you to? At least, that would be a place to start, so you don't have to start at zero... Good luck on your search!!
Kateana is offline  
#3675 of 5048 Old 02-11-2007, 07:41 AM
 
AnnieMarie's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: South Africa
Posts: 774
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by turnipmama View Post
What on earth did he think women did before modern medicine??!!
LOL - Yeah, it's a wonder the human race isn't extinct seeing that he hasn't been around all through the ages to perform c-sections!!: The really scary thing is that women around here think he is a great OB, great big idiot if you ask me... He also insists on doing u/s every month and said I shouldn't bother coming to see him if I didn't want this as he would not be able to tell if there was something wrong he is definitely old enough to have qualified long before u/s existed, guess he must have skipped the part about doing pre-natal checks when he was studying. I would bet on it he was one of those dr's who used to x-ray for pre-natal checking when that was still the in thing to do. Needless to say I told him if that was his attitude that I wouldn't bother coming to see him:

ANNIE - Crunchy WAHM to 2 boys & baby girl born 12July08 ~From contentment with little comes happiness â African Proverb
AnnieMarie is offline  
#3676 of 5048 Old 02-11-2007, 12:21 PM
 
phoebemommy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Anchorage, AK
Posts: 1,081
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lohagrace View Post
i had my dd in a sling in an airport when she was 2 months old. she was a very strong baby and could always hold her head up. anyway, she was in the vertical position in her sling and was kind of awake/resting with her head cocked to one side. this older lady walked up and barked at me "HOLD THAT BABY'S HEAD UP!" and walked away leaving me stunned and speechless. its not like my baby was crying or showing discomfort of any kind. in fact, she was very content. she didn't make a peep on the 6 hour flight! but people, especially of the older generations, seem to think they need to give us advice or something. my DH (and the rest of my family) still say "hold that baby's head up!" when we are joking about unwanted advice.
once my grandma said to me, when dd was 6 months old, "that baby sure gets held a lot." WTF? i guess i should neglect her more! thanks for the advice, grandma!
This reminds me of my Christmas; ds was 3 months. There were plenty of crazy things said, but I swear I had to explain to about six different people every time ds went to sleep that no, thank you, I don't need to put him down. Sometimes I do put him down when he's asleep (sometimes not), but I was so harrassed by so many people wanting to hold him and coochie coo at him that I claimed his naptime as my time with him. They also got all concerned because he likes to nap in my arms with his head cocked off to the side at a sharp angle. He could hold his head up at like 2 weeks, so it wasn't as though I was just letting it roll around or anything. It was totally his position in the womb, and he'd put himself back that way if I tried to rearrange him. But by the looks on my inlaws' faces, you'd think I was the most idiotic mother in the world.
phoebemommy is offline  
#3677 of 5048 Old 02-11-2007, 12:26 PM
 
phoebemommy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Anchorage, AK
Posts: 1,081
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Harmony96 View Post

Ok hmm better get this back on topic before I post... Oh when DH and I told my mom (before we were even trying to get pregnant) that we planned to cloth diaper, she was like "we'll see how long THAT will last." But now that I'm doing it, it's just another load of laundry, really. And even people who disposable diaper have a bunch of laundry w/ a new baby, anyway, right?
I heard a lady at a baby shower talking about cloth diapering. She said she had a diaper service for a couple weeks and found it overwhelmingly difficult, the whole process of putting the diapers outside to be picked up, then bringing the fresh ones in. That's why she went disposable. Fair enough, I guess, but I would find the process of taking that much more garbage out, then bringing that many more groceries (diapers) in equally as taxing. It's so much easier that my diaper bin is just steps away from the washing machine!

Oh yeah, and my MIL was all determined that she'd better pay for diaper service for us. She really tried to pressure me into it. She couldn't fathom that I was LOOKING FORWARD to doing diaper laundry. I guess I'm just weird that way.
phoebemommy is offline  
#3678 of 5048 Old 02-11-2007, 12:49 PM
Banned
 
Meg Murry.'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Between here and there
Posts: 1,841
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by GradysMom View Post


And when I was pregnant and over due I really took issue with how many people said my baby was stubborn for not comming out. What a negative word.
Thought you'd like this poem from Donald Justice:

To a Ten-months' child

Late arrival, no
One would think of blaming you
For hesitating so.

Who, setting his hand to knock
At a door so strange as this one,
Might not draw back ?
Meg Murry. is offline  
#3679 of 5048 Old 02-11-2007, 01:48 PM
 
davi's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: MI
Posts: 4,492
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
so, i LOVE when people tell me their "why i couldn't nurse" stories! then i tell mine: i nursed 1st dd till she weaned at about 2 years old (which usually causes in itself) i have had more challenges this time around though, i only nurse with one breast & have had mastitis twice, thrush & can't nurse on the other side as i have had to have 2 surgeries for abcesses post-partum. that REALLY gets the jaws droppin'!! almost everyone who hears my story says "i didnt know you could nurse with only one breast" or my favorite "whatever caused your breast infection is going to get into the baby" my babe is only 5 months old & OF COURSE people are always trying to cram food into her...i have heard on several occassions that she's never going to learn to eat & (this from my mom) "why are you trying to be some kind of martyr type super-mom keeping on with this BF stuff & not letting her have food?"...ummmmmmmm WHAT? when i was REALLY struggling with my supply after surgery my mom came over to "help" & kept trying to take Lilly out of our bed to "give her a bottle already"...she got kicked out & my DH walked in the door to see me throwing my mom out. he got back in the car & picked me up some roses oooh & when people hear we did natural childbirtyh AND co-sleep....lord, the list goes on!!!
davi is offline  
#3680 of 5048 Old 02-12-2007, 03:26 PM
 
BunchaCrunch's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 53
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by ramlita View Post
Oh, man, Buncha.

How old was your mom when she had her first??
Amazingly, she was only twenty five herself.
BunchaCrunch is offline  
#3681 of 5048 Old 02-12-2007, 03:28 PM
 
BunchaCrunch's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 53
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by beanbean View Post
I told this to my DH and he commented that he would have said, "Get out of my house now and don't contact us until you're ready to apologize." And DH is a very tactful, thoughtful guy.

Hon, your family is not "mainstream" - they're a bit insane.
If my husband had not been at work when my parent's little display went down, I am sure we would no longer be receiving phone calls from them now :P I did not even know what to say, but rather stood there with my mouth about to hit the floor. Who says things like that?!
BunchaCrunch is offline  
#3682 of 5048 Old 02-12-2007, 04:03 PM
 
Momtwice's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2001
Posts: 10,468
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lady Lilya View Post

My MIL asks if I will ALLOW my baby to have a pacifier. I'm not sure exactly where this comes from.
Depends on the generation. At one time pacifiers were considered too indulgent. Nowadays people avoid them if they are breastfeeding (some people) because they can interfere with latch/milk supply etc.

Take the time to heal from your marriage before you move on with someone else. Make a list of all the qualities you would like in a new partner and then work on growing that way yourself. ~mandib50
Momtwice is offline  
#3683 of 5048 Old 02-12-2007, 05:37 PM
 
mntnmom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Germany
Posts: 1,835
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lohagrace View Post
a friend of mine with real brass ones was on a plane once nursing her toddler and a man walking by said "that's disgusing!" and she just looked at him and said "you're fat, and i don't see anyone commenting on that." all matter of fact! wow. i don't have the courage to say something, although it would be tempting.
I've never had anyone say anything about me breastfeeding, but WOW! I wish I had a pair of "brass ones" like her!!!

Mom of 4 aspiring midwife "Friend"ly seeker
mntnmom is offline  
#3684 of 5048 Old 02-12-2007, 07:47 PM
 
libranbutterfly's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 906
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
My parents are by far the worst about the "dumb" comments. (They are firmly set that what they did w/ me is right, even though they have mellowed out big time with my little brother) Some of their most recent gems of wisdom: If she wants to eat that often, I would definately give her some cereal. (Dad about my 4 month old, after I explained that she cluster feeds in the evenings) I don't know why you're bothering with cloth diapers, it's not like she will remember how comfortable she was at this age (Mom, even though they used cloth diapers with me) You need to break that habit soon, its really not healthy (Mom, after I told her how nice it was to wake up with my 2 beautiful children in bed with me)

And one from my MIL and her brother. Not directed toward me, but sad. Backstory: A 2 yr old boy has a mom that doesnt care about him, only his big sister (would take him out in winter in just a dipe, sister had 3 pairs of winter boots, etc) my MIL's sister offers to take care of boy, mom gratiously accepts. 2 yr old boy spits at people and laughs, runs away, etc. "Brittany broke Bill's glasses today so he wouldn't spank Ethan. Bill loves Ethan, not like Teresa's (MIL's sis) kids (Brittany is one of these) He'd ony spank Ethan if he deserved it" I couldn't help blurting out "Ethan did not need a spanking, he just needed more love and attention. after being passed around to whoever would watch him for 2 years, he's trying to see if you all really love him. How would you feel if you were him?"

jeneca mommy to kamille, 6 lexi, 4
#3 due 2/28/12

libranbutterfly is offline  
#3685 of 5048 Old 02-12-2007, 07:55 PM
 
libranbutterfly's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 906
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
One more I just thought of. My MIL's SIL (what does that make her to me?) brought her grandkids up to visit one weekend. I went out to help her get the kids out of the car, and she had the 6 month olds carrier car seat in the back seat, facing forwards, with the handle up and the seatbelt going across right infront of the handle (3 inches from babies face) and his 3 yr old sis in a backless booster in the front seat, w/ the seatbelt buckled behind her. Her only comment when I tried to show her the big pictures on the side of the carrier showing how to install it? Yeah, it takes an act of congress to get kids in and out of cars these days. I had to go buy B (3 yr old) a new car seat so I wouldn't get a ticket on the way up here. I thought about telling her that she would definately have gotten a ticket with the kids strapped in (or not straped in) like that, but just desided to keep my mouth shut. Honestly, I think both children would have been safer w/ no car seats. I now that they didnt have to use car seats with their kids, but.........

jeneca mommy to kamille, 6 lexi, 4
#3 due 2/28/12

libranbutterfly is offline  
#3686 of 5048 Old 02-12-2007, 11:17 PM
 
kalynnsmom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Midlothian, TX
Posts: 467
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I love my grandma but the other day she was telling me that I was spoiling my twins by not letting them CIO. She said it's good for their lungs. She said that she has all these lung problems because she wasn't allowed to CIO. Umm...No, it's because you smoked since you were 15 and now have emphysema!

My mom said she had to wean my brother because he was eating every 2 hours and he was getting too fat. We had a big argument over it, I told her that it's pretty normal for babies to eat that often.
kalynnsmom is offline  
#3687 of 5048 Old 02-12-2007, 11:28 PM
 
elmh23's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Where it's hot!
Posts: 9,359
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
We're gearing up for a new baby soon (8 days until my due date ) and I've been saying all along that if dd, age 2, wants to be there, she is more than welcome, even though MIL and my mom will not be allowed in the room (they will be allowed at the free standing birth center, unless I decide to kick them out.) Anyways, last night MIL told me that she didn't think it was a good idea because she thinks it will make dd fear going to the bathroom. I just laughed and said that all over the world kids witness their siblings being born. I figure if she gets scared, she'll let us know and we'll send her out to the grandmas!

Also, MIL told me a couple weeks ago that dh wasn't circ'd. Um, yes he is! I personally think she's losing it, but oh well.

Mama of three.
 
elmh23 is offline  
#3688 of 5048 Old 02-13-2007, 12:11 AM
 
BetsyS's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: world of craziness
Posts: 5,387
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
All my life, I've been told how my brother and I were breastfed as babies. My mother was actually very proud of breastfeeding us, in rural south GA in the 70s, as there was lots of pressure to FF.

Lately, I've been talking to her in more detail. Turns out, she weaned me at 6 months when she got pregnant with my brother. I was talking about how most of the time fertility didn't return until after 6 months if breastfeeding, and she was saying, "oh, well, we started you on solids at 3 weeks, and you had a paci, and you slept through the night." Yeah, mom, that is a little different than my life with a babe.

Then, she told me she had to wean my brother onto formula at 5 months, because he "was just skin and bones". Evidently, her milk was "bad", and he chubbed up on the formula.
BetsyS is offline  
#3689 of 5048 Old 02-13-2007, 06:04 AM
 
ecoteat's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Posts: 4,367
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by libranbutterfly View Post
One more I just thought of. My MIL's SIL (what does that make her to me?) brought her grandkids up to visit one weekend. I went out to help her get the kids out of the car, and she had the 6 month olds carrier car seat in the back seat, facing forwards, with the handle up and the seatbelt going across right infront of the handle (3 inches from babies face) and his 3 yr old sis in a backless booster in the front seat, w/ the seatbelt buckled behind her. Her only comment when I tried to show her the big pictures on the side of the carrier showing how to install it? Yeah, it takes an act of congress to get kids in and out of cars these days. I had to go buy B (3 yr old) a new car seat so I wouldn't get a ticket on the way up here. I thought about telling her that she would definately have gotten a ticket with the kids strapped in (or not straped in) like that, but just desided to keep my mouth shut. Honestly, I think both children would have been safer w/ no car seats. I now that they didnt have to use car seats with their kids, but.........
:
I'm more relaxed about safety than a lot of people here, but that's awful! I also tend to keep my mouth shut in situations like that, but I would have been tempted to install it correctly when she wasn't looking. Those snap-in carriers are so easy! :
ecoteat is offline  
#3690 of 5048 Old 02-14-2007, 01:10 AM
 
Scrubsjm's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Martinsburg, WV
Posts: 315
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I finished the whole thread!

I've had some real doozies said to me so here goes.

*When I was about 30 weeks pregnant with my first dd I was measuring small. I mentioned it my office manager at the time who is/was a child hating , because I had to go back for another u/s the following week. She began laughing hysterically saying she could just imagine my baby being born with a tiny shrunken head like something you would see on National Geographic. Real nice to say to the worried pregnant mom, I had to go on bedrest the following week for the remainder of my pregnancy, served her right.

*When I saw dh's grandma sometime during my pregnancy she said, now you be sure and take good care of OUR baby. Now that could have been taken in a nice way if the first time I met her she didn't make a comment about how WHEN dh and I got divorced the china belonged to him.

*In the hospital after I had dd a nurse came in and asked who would be helping me with the baby when I got home because she just didn't think I could take care of her by myself. Um, maybe my husband, you know the guy with the matching wedding band who's been here with me the whole time?

* FIL always asks if dd has a "social problem" when she needs a diaper change. No FIL it's called a dirty diaper, don't you ever go to the bathroom?

* When we had just bought our first house and I was pregnant with dd #2 FIL takes dh aside and says "you're really in the trap now aren't you?"

* When we lost dd #2 one of my Aunts said you know my SDIL had a miscarriage at 6 weeks it was really hard on her to, but you'll be fine, you can always have another. Um #1 I didn't have a miscarriage dd was born severely premature and died that's different, and #2 who says I can have more? Even if I can they won't replace her.

* Another Aunt same night, asks how I'm doing. Not well I say, but I'll make it. She says you know it was for the best, there was probably something wrong with it, and it would have died anyway. No I say, she was fine just born to soon, and SHE wasn't an it, she was a girl and her name is Kira.

(Is it any wonder I didn't even tell these people about dd #3 until she was born?)

*FIL says, I wonder what sort of psychological damage children today will have from being confined to carseats and not allowed to interact with the family in the car. Better that then dead from not being safely in a carseat I reply. Oh but look at our kids they're fine and they used to ride in the front seat with a toy steering wheel and pretend to drive. Pretty lucky he survived that dangerous of a situation isn't it FIL?

(Oh and pysch damage from being kept safe in the car, but it's fine to confine kids to cribs and playpens all day long right? FIL tells a lovely story all the frickin time about how he would put SIL in her crib and sit on the front porch and listen to her scream herself to sleep while he chanted "go to sleep Tracy, just go to sleep"

* FIL again! You know when I was born the only thing I could tolerate was mashed bananas. That's all I ate, and see I turned about fine. Just fine expect for your horrible weight problem and atrocious eating habits. The man puts extra butter and mayo on everything!

* A LLL leader the first time I met her and I was 8 months pregnant, oh wow you're tiny, what are you having a peanut?

* FIL Can we give 6 mo old, 9 mo old, 12 mo old dd soda yet? I just love the first time they get soda their eyes water and they gasp and sputter and cough, it's so funny!

* MIL this time, to my crying dd, I love you when you cry, Grandma still loves you when you cry. I'm so glad you love her even when she cries, but how about trying to comfort her or giving her back to me.

* FIL everytime we changed our ebf dd's. Does she have diarrhea, why does her poop look like that, what's wrong with them. Dh finally said "dad for the 50th time this is what breastmilk poop looks like. It's great, it doesn't smell, they aren't constipated, this is how it's supposed to be, stop asking! There is nothing wrong with her poop!"

* FIL after I leave the room to nurse because I know it offends him and I don't want to rock the boat. First he goes as many rooms away from me as he can, and takes dh aside, you know I'm just uncomfortable when she does that, I can only see breasts as a sexual thing. Dh was very good about saying, look we know you are uncomfortable, she left the room to help you feel at ease, so you don't need to say anything. Also you are really stepping over some lines when you make comments like that about my wifes breasts. She is feeding your grandkids the most perfect food possible and you need to get over it. The kicker? SIL walked in the room not a minute later as I'm still nursing and asks to hold the baby. So obviously you couldn't even tell I was nursing.

* Just this week MIL sends my dd's a valentines gift. Dd #3 is allergic to dairy and only 13 months old. The gift includes 2 bears each with a bag of chocolate, 2 king size chocolate bars, a bag of chocolate mini's, yogurt covered raisins, lollipops and a card game. Tell me what out of that can a dairy allergic 13 month old have? That's right the stuffed bear, that's it. No fun taking each of those gifts away from her. Dh asks MIL about it, and she says well I couldn't send just dd #1 the chocolate and not dd #3, sure you could have that would have been appropriate, much better then prying the gifts out of her fingers.

* MIL at Thanksgiving, can we give 9 mo old dd ice cream for dessert? Now dh says, it's dairy she's to young for dairy. How about just a little whipped cream then? asks MIL

* And finally of course it's FIL again. He has the most obnoxious habit of making up things he thinks are kids are saying. So dd was learning to pull up, and his little commentary went something like this. Now, I'll just get my feet under me here, hold on with my hands and wait till the nerves grow in my feet so I know where they are. Then I'll really be able to stand.

(Uh she is standing, and I'm pretty sure she has NERVES IN HER FEET!)

It reminds me of a time my friend was told babies don't have bones in their feet until they are two, so it doesn't matter if you put them in shoes that are to small.

Julia- wife to Tom since 3/01 mom to three girls- A Dancer 9/02, An Angel 11/04 and A Gymnast 1/06 + one on the way EDD 1/10
Scrubsjm is offline  
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Drag and Drop File Upload
Drag files here to attach!
Upload Progress: 0
Options

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Mothering Forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Password:
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:

Log-in

Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off