Independent napping - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 16 Old 07-19-2007, 04:57 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I hold dd (7mo) for all her naps. I love it.
...
But when, oh when will I be able to get stuff (non-computer/knitting stuff) done while she's asleep? Yes, I do wear her in a carrier, all.the.time. but she's heavy. 25lbs of chunky goodness heavy. And sometimes she nurses to sleep. And sometimes she stays asleep an extra hour if she nurses in the middle, which is kinda hard if she's on my back...

I have no intention of encouraging her to nap on her own - she sleeps great and I don't feel like messing with it - but I know in her own time, she'll be ready. I don't want to miss that!

How will I know when we've reached that point?
How did you know?

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#2 of 16 Old 07-19-2007, 05:01 PM
 
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For us, it was obvious at cruising age, around 10 months, that it was time for DD1 to nap down on the bed. Up until then the only way she'd nap down was if I spent an enormous amount of time rocking her to sleep beforehand, like an hour or more. Mostly she just slept on me in the glider. I had only her then so I could do that. But around 10 months, she started to sleep more soundly, more like the way toddlers sleep when you can carry them in from the car and they never wake up. It happened all by itself that I could put her down and she'd stay asleep. One day I tried it because I had something I HAD to deal with, and she stayed asleep-- like WOW.

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#3 of 16 Old 07-19-2007, 05:10 PM
 
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My dd has been independent napping since birth, so I think its just something that any baby can do any time, it's just what they have been exposed to.
She goes through nap changes, like right now waking every so often, because she is more alert so I'm trying more independant napping in a quieter place. That way I can do things without her, like more time on my treadmill, etc.

Good luck! I glad you're enjoying your dd's naps with you, I love it when she naps in her mei tai.
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#4 of 16 Old 07-19-2007, 05:17 PM
 
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My dd has been independent napping since birth, so I think its just something that any baby can do any time, it's just what they have been exposed to.
Respectfully disagreeing, I tried to put both my babies down to nap independently at birth, and they just weren't having it : - I tried periodically, and my son wasn't ready to independently nap for more than 30 min until he was about 13 months; my daughter seems to be getting to that point right around the same time. I will respectfully submit that it is just as much their individual temperament and sleep needs as it is what they are exposed to as their 'routine'.

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#5 of 16 Old 07-19-2007, 05:40 PM
 
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Respectfully disagreeing, I tried to put both my babies down to nap independently at birth, and they just weren't having it : - I tried periodically, and my son wasn't ready to independently nap for more than 30 min until he was about 13 months; my daughter seems to be getting to that point right around the same time. I will respectfully submit that it is just as much their individual temperament and sleep needs as it is what they are exposed to as their 'routine'.

Oh yes I agree, I should have added "depending on their temperament".

I know plenty of babies who won't nap independently even at one or two years of age. Just different sleep habits.
I meant, I think there is no one time to try it, kwim? You can try it from birth, or three months, or any age really, they can be ready any time and there may not be any hints. That's what it was like when dd started STTN too, no hints or anything. Babies surprise us!
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#6 of 16 Old 07-19-2007, 05:52 PM
 
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Respectfully disagreeing, I tried to put both my babies down to nap independently at birth, and they just weren't having it : - I tried periodically, and my son wasn't ready to independently nap for more than 30 min until he was about 13 months; my daughter seems to be getting to that point right around the same time. I will respectfully submit that it is just as much their individual temperament and sleep needs as it is what they are exposed to as their 'routine'.
Yeah, I'm respectfully disagreeing too. I tried for ages to push it, but my DD wouldn't sleep more than 10 minutes if she wasn't being held. It's pure biology.

I was able to lay her down for a nap around 9-10 months. But, I still had to nurse her back to sleep a few times if I wanted her to sleep longer than 30 minutes. That wore off around 15 months or so, and she didn't need any help.

I'm SOOOO thankful I learned about babywearing--I've heard so many horror stories from mainstream friends about babies that couldn't get past that 10 minute or 30 minute mark and how difficult it makes it for mama and baby.
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#7 of 16 Old 07-19-2007, 06:46 PM
 
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I let Trixie fall asleep with me then I just move her to her crib, she does great with this she will start to babble when she wakes and I go get her
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#8 of 16 Old 07-19-2007, 10:49 PM
 
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[QUOTE=blue-eden;8682009]My dd has been independent napping since birth, so I think its just something that any baby can do any time, it's just what they have been exposed to.
She goes through nap changes, like right now waking every so often, because she is more alert so I'm trying more independant napping in a quieter place. That way I can do things without her, like more time on my treadmill, etc.
QUOTE]


"can do" ... hrm so would that mean that my baby chooses not to? ya, i disagree with this post. i usually hold my baby if i want her to take a good nap and not be cranky the rest of the day. about 90% of the time within 10 mins of laying her down (anywhere, crib, my bed, etc) she wakes up and that is it for that nap. i think you just have to take ques from your baby. try it out a couple times a week maybe and see if it works...

Mama to Amelia - age 6

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#9 of 16 Old 07-19-2007, 11:48 PM
 
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My ten-month-old has probably taken 6 'independent' naps, other than falling asleep in the car, in his whole life! He nurses down on my lap & conks out, but if I nurse him down in bed and then move him to his crib in our room (which works at night), he's usually up immediately.

We finally broke down and got an Ergobaby carrier so I could have him on my back and get some things done (he grabs EVERYTHING in a hip carry sling or frontpack!) He'll conk out in it, but then I can't put him down, and he's 23 pounds!

I've decided to just surrender to it. A few weeks ago, after going on a trip and getting all the concerned relatives and friends giving advice, I started feeling like I HAD to try to get him to nap in his crib. I got extremely type A about the whole thing and decided to try it for a week... the first day it worked for half an hour. The second day, he woke up immediately, then wouldn't fall asleep again, even nursing, and we were both cranky and exhausted. By the middle of the week, I decided I kind of liked having the cuddling time anyway, and decided to just stop worrying about it.

Sorry, that wasn't an answer to the original question... it's just nice to hear from other people with lap-nappers! sometimes I feel like the only person whose baby missed the memo about drifting off to sleep while staring at their hands.

doula mom to a fantastic 3-year-old dirt-lover , Yeshuel, m/c at 10wks 10/6/08 , and Alan born 10/7/09
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#10 of 16 Old 07-20-2007, 12:58 AM
 
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It took us 12 months. I just changed things up. By then she had started sleeping a little better at night. I just lay her down, nurse her (I usually break suction after her swallows minimize, this sometimes takes a few times) and sneak off. I can't nurse her then lay her down bc the process of laying her down will wake her up. *Also* since she is able to sleep on her tummy now she sleeps a lot better, too. If my next kiddo is a tough sleeper, I might try that earlier on :. I usually have to go in there and nurse her again after an hour. I think she goes into another phase of sleep and needs me for transitioning then. I loved that first year and all the cuddle time we got. But I am definitley glad to have some time to myself now!!!

It will come with time. Just try not to worry about it, or let what other people say get to you!
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#11 of 16 Old 07-20-2007, 09:52 AM
 
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Well, my 2-3 month old baby could do it, but apparently that baby is long gone. She is now 8 months and hasn't napped well on her own in quite a while. I'm hoping by the time she's 12 or so she won't need to be held.
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#12 of 16 Old 07-20-2007, 11:41 AM
 
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Originally Posted by The4OfUs View Post
Respectfully disagreeing, I tried to put both my babies down to nap independently at birth, and they just weren't having it : - <snip> I will respectfully submit that it is just as much their individual temperament and sleep needs as it is what they are exposed to as their 'routine'.
:

we've tried drowsy but awake, not because i am committed to getting an independent sleeper anytime soon, but because i figured it was worth a shot to see if she would. nope. no way.

it's not just what you do from birth; it's the child you have. mine is high-energy and needs lots of help winding down for sleep. there is no drowsy--just asleep and awake

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#13 of 16 Old 07-20-2007, 11:44 AM
 
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How will I know when we've reached that point?
How did you know?
Just try every so often and see what happens. With DS, sometimes he's at that point and sometimes not; it even varies from one nap to another on a single day. So, who knows....
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#14 of 16 Old 07-23-2007, 06:36 PM
 
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My 8 mos. DD will also quickly awaken if put down or left alone to nap.

Sometimes I find this frustrating but most of the time I appreciate it.

It is my only time to have a break. I have rediscovered my joy of reading. I have read more books in the past 8 mos. than I had read in the past 8 years. This has inspired DH to do the same and we cancelled the cable completely.

I keep the computer by the bed and pay bills, surf etc.

Sometimes I do sneak away when I wouldn't mind if she awoke. Other times, like today when she's suffering teething pain, I daren't move an inch.

Sometimes it's a nice excuse to get away...

Sometimes I nap.

Sure, I could persist at trying to get all that cleaning and cooking done when she sleeps but lets face it, there's never enough time to get it all the way you want it. Better to direct your energy towards positive feelings about how you're parenting than getting stressed about the kitchen floor. (easier said than done).

Take the time. Claim it. You deserve it.

and
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#15 of 16 Old 07-23-2007, 06:39 PM
 
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4 month old dd prefers to nap stretched out on our bed. if your dd seems really squirmy or uncomfortable then maybe she wants to lay down. sounds like u are havin fun holdin her, so keep it up

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#16 of 16 Old 07-23-2007, 06:50 PM
 
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How will I know when we've reached that point?
How did you know?
We knew we had reached the point when life interfered - my two older stepsons were home for summer vacation. I didn't have the luxury of holding her for a few hours every day in a quiet room.

What worked for us was putting her on her tummy (since she could roll over anyway). I still have to nurse her to sleep, and lie with her on the futon before I can transfer her to her crib. But I've discovered she sleeps better in her dark, quiet room than in the chaos of the family room, where she used to nap on me.

While I miss the quiet times of having her nap on me, I am now able to play games and spend quality "baby sister free" time with my older two. I plan to continue using the crib for naps when school starts again.

If it doesn't bother you and she's sleeping well, do what you're doing. If you're starting to resent it or if she's not sleeping as well as she used to, try something different.
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