Violent 5 month old! - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 10 Old 07-08-2003, 07:48 AM - Thread Starter
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#2 of 10 Old 07-08-2003, 10:43 AM
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My 5 mo old is the same way, but not as bad. Sometimes I do get very angry, but as you said- she doesn't know she is hurting you and she wouldn't understand any form of discipline anyway. I am thinking it might be a phase. My dd seems to want to do so much (stand, walk, ect) but her muscles aren't developed enough, so it frusterates her. This, too, shall pass.

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#3 of 10 Old 07-08-2003, 04:34 PM
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I have to agree with emily. my kiddo is 5 months and he's the same way. with the painful grabbing i do take his hands away and give him a finger to hold on to instead. sometimes i say ouch that hurts mommy quietly.
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#4 of 10 Old 07-09-2003, 11:24 AM
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with all 3 kiddos (5 yr old dd, 4 yr old dd & 7 mo old ds) I've found the 4 mo - 7 mo age to be tough because babe wants to do so much, but can't! once babe is mobile, they seemed to get easier (of course, then you have the issue of trying to keep them safe. some babes are easy to distract & others just get mad.)

I also found 18 mos - about 2 1/2 yrs another tough period because babe's verbal skills do not match his comprehension skills.

also, if you're nursing you should try to see if there is some food reaction that may be aggravating the babe. if you've started solids, also watch (my 7 mo old really is not much into solids yet. I've tried a few plain cheerios a few times to keep him busy, but have just noticed a kind of 'hyper' reaction if he actually eats them.) dairy was/is a big aggression trigger for my 5 yr old (big problem if babe is on formula)

hth a little & keep us posted!
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#5 of 10 Old 07-09-2003, 11:29 PM
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From my experience with one babe (but a feisty little guy!), I would agree that the 4 - 7 month period is a difficult one. Ezra's behavior during that time was almost precisely like your DD's, and I also found the "breast grabbing" to be the most difficult. I always envisioned breastfeeding to be a relaxing and comforting experience (for both mom and babe), but even with my best attempts to hold his hands, I would often end up with bruises. Sometimes giving him fabric to hold or singing lullabies to distract would help. Generally speaking, he was most animated while around me and DH. So, taking him out for walks or trips around town would often calm him for a time. While at home, I would keep him in a constant rotation -- from sling, to crib, to exersaucer, to pack and play, etc -- about every 20 minutes or so.

Ezra just turned 8 months a few days ago, and he has begun moving everywhere. Just today, I realized how much calmer he has become, even when we are holding him. He still screeches very loudly at times (out of happiness or sometimes annoyance), but he doesn't seem nearly as "grabby" or hyper. So, perhaps you can find some comfort in the "phase" idea. We've moved on to the "restless sleep" phase, so I'm trying to have hope myself. If you can't connect your DD's behavior to any food (a definite consideration), perhaps all of her pent-up energy will be released once she can get her little limbs moving around!
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#6 of 10 Old 07-10-2003, 08:33 AM - Thread Starter
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#7 of 10 Old 07-10-2003, 10:44 PM
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My dd (8 months) also grabs at the boob hile she's eating and Ywch!!! those little nails right on the nipple...I almost wish she'd bit me instead!

What has worked for me: putting her hand in my mouth (weird, I know, I got the idea from a mom here), giving her a toy (like a small stuffed animal) to hold. It's crazy though how intent she is on grabbing me sometimes. i wonder if it's something they're hard wired to do? 'cause it seems like so many of them do it!

(other times she pulls my armpit hair, like when I nurse her lying down )

As far as the screaming, my dd is also a screamer. although less so now. Here's a suggestion i read, and which seems to help a little: rather than hushing her, I justr espond in a very very quiet voice, like saying "that's very loud" in an almost whisper.

ggod luck to you!
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#8 of 10 Old 07-12-2003, 03:15 PM
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I've got a dd just like yours. I have bruises and scratches on my arms and breasts. She also tries to give me hickeys on my neck and arms if I take her off the breast. I try to hold her arm down while we're nursing, but she insists on flayling it around. This also happens when I'm trying to calm her to sleep (she's never been good at nursing to sleep). The last couple of days I've just put her down finally, and twice she's just gone to sleep!!
One thing I never let her do is play with my other nipple while she's nursing. I've read lots of posts from moms whose babes are driving them crazy doing this, so I either wear a bra while nursing or cover my other breast with my hand.
I'm glad to hear from other mom's that this may just be a phase. Hopefully your dd will pass through this phase quickly.
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#9 of 10 Old 07-12-2003, 04:27 PM
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Do you have a jumper thing. sometimes Ava just has to jump. she is perfectly happy to be in there and gets her jumpies out. If I ahad to take all that on my lap i would go crazy. Another thing that helps her get it out of her system is tofill the tub with about an inch or two of water and let he go crazy splashing. First she sits and splashes then lays on her backs and kicks and then over to her tummy. the whole bath lasts about 45 minutes and she never stopps moving. She really likes the walker in our church nursery (too many stairs in our house) and will scoot all over the place. for the full hour and half that we are there. she is so desperate to move but can't even figure out crawling (she is 7 months old) It just helps her to be mobile. she likes her exersaucer. gives her something push up and down on without falling over or having an upset mom.

Other times if she is hurting me she just gets put down. You simply cannot hurt me and still nurse. I try holing her hands and tucking her legs under my arms but if she just insistes that she must squeeze twist, bite and kick then I end the feeding. She is usualy more than willing to sit still and eat when she gets hungry enough. I don't do it in a vengful way. More of a "hey that hurts. when you are ready to eat let me know" sometimes it is down up down up and then on the third or fouth try she will settle down a nurse.

The truest answer to violence is love. The truest answer to death is life. The only prevention for violence is for the heart to have no violence within it.  We cannot prevent evil through any system devised by mankind. But we can grapple with evil and defeat it, but only with love—real love.

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#10 of 10 Old 07-12-2003, 09:23 PM
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My dd is 9 mo and can pull up and almost stand by herself but she is also v into grabbing. I think its definitely a developmental skill they need to practice, so what better time than when they're still and nursing - in their eyes at least. with my dd it's not the breast she pulls, thank god, but my hair. i know one loses hair after giving birth but this is ridiculous! she loves to wind it round her hand and pull while nursing, occasionally tensing her foot against it to give added leverage to pull it out by the roots. if i take it away she cries. so i now tie my hair back before starting nursing and wear a pendant she can yank on. another idea is to wear a string of wooden beads while nursing for baby to grab. she has shown interest in grabbing my nipples but i quickly cover them with my hand - it's a definite no go. I've contemplated cutting my hair short but i think this will pass soon, hopefully.
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