Free time before baby arrives - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 21 Old 07-31-2003, 09:47 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm due in about 2 weeks and I feel like we're more or less ready for the baby to arrive. For the last couple days, I've found myself not quite knowing what to do with myself. (sounds crazy, I know!!) I need some suggestions for what to do to get my mind off of every little twinge in my body. So...what would you mamas do if you had some free time with no kids around? No house cleaning suggestions, please! We moved recently and I've spent the last month unpacking and cleaning. I'm done for awhile! Anything that you wished you had done before the baby arrived that you didn't get done?
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#2 of 21 Old 07-31-2003, 10:28 PM
 
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Hi Sharon. I think i may have been feeling similar to you. I had my baby (1st one) on May 28 and found the last month or so I was really feeling ready. There is nothing really I wish I had done differently - I had to go pee every 5 minutes and had trouble walking for very long so I couldn't go very far from home or a bathroom. I spent a lot of time just vegging - I would sit with a book and a cup of tea and just stare at the cat. Actually, I spent a lot of time just hanging out with the cat and listening to silence. I also spent a lot of time reading. And, I started my maternity leave several weeks before my due date so I had time to adjust to being at home. I went through shell shock after having the baby and coming home to a new life as it was - it would have been worse had I just stopped my work and had the baby a day later!

I'd say just do things you enjoy and you may not get the chance to do once all your energies are absorbed by a newborn. Going to movies is a big one that springs to mind for me!

Good luck Sharon and whatever you do - enjoy your last few weeks.
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#3 of 21 Old 07-31-2003, 10:48 PM
 
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I wrote letters to my babies in the final weeks -- I was feeling so many things at once....

You could start filling out a baby book -- there are places for things like the family tree, and where you live, and stuff that you could put in ahead of time. Its really hard to find time to write these things in afterwards.

You could read a book on breastfeeding.

Or just rest a lot, and take long slow walks.
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#4 of 21 Old 07-31-2003, 11:01 PM
 
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i relaxed a lot... nice warm baths and payed a lot of attention to my cat (our first baby )
one thing i wished i did was make food for the freezer!!! and stock up on easy to make nutritional things. when my dh went back to work after 2 weeks i couldn't figure out how to feed myself!! making something to eat was just too complicated while trying to hold the baby or nurse the babe.

maybe play around with your sling so you kinda know how to work it before you have to try it the first time with the babe

have a great birth
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#5 of 21 Old 08-01-2003, 12:11 AM
 
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It's so great that you're taking this time to ready yourself for your babe. I worked up until 1 week before my due date, and (of course) went into labor at 4 am that next morning. : I ended up with a c-section cause my lil was transverse. I didn't have a particularly painful recovery, I was just REALLY, REALLY tired & weak! So kudos to you for thinking ahead!

Here are some of the things I wish I'd done:

1. Research: look into vaxing now & decide; look into circumcision & decide now -- I regret both now...

2. Prepare & buy yourself easy to grab snacks. I lived on granola bars & fresh fruit & veggies quite often. *Assuming* you're breastfeeding, find what the best method of water is for you. I used to buy water (in personal sized bottles), then reuse them many times before recycling them so I didn't feel quite so guilty. Then I found out about the possible (& probable) harm of reusing these one-time use bottles. I am currently looking for a "permanent" re-usable water bottle that is the size I want.

3. Set yourself up with lots of magazines or books, etc. that you can read one handed -- once you get the bfing thing down, that is -- to start it will probably be a two handed, shirt around your neck, & 15 pillow affair! :LOL

4. Read up on how NOT to rest & sit. I believe that sitting in the wrong position so often when I did get to rest was part of the reason Ian was in the wrong position. I read up a lot on that...afterwards. :

5. Any interest in knitting, sewing, or quilting? Those are all things you can do if you want to do "baby" stuff...

Good Luck!
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#6 of 21 Old 08-01-2003, 01:33 AM
 
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Do a belly mask, pamper yourself, & go to the movies or see theatre show.

Those are my plans that I can think of right now
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#7 of 21 Old 08-01-2003, 08:03 AM
 
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Sharon, I know how you feel. I thought I was going to go insane waiting the last few weeks. I had false labor 2 weeks before I actually delivered and after that I was climbing the walls. I spent my time sewing, sewing, sewing. The day before I went in to labor the needle shank broke off my sewing machine so I couldn't sew anymore! My dh is convinced this is why I started labor.
The suggestion someone made of writing letters to the babe is a good one: we (my dh and I) kept a journal all during my pregnancy about our feelings, hopes and dreams and it is amazing to look back on it now. You quickly forget all of the pre-delivery feelings once the babe arrives. My other thought is to rent movies... that's something I enjoy doing that is much harder to do now that the babe is here. Good luck!
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#8 of 21 Old 08-01-2003, 12:31 PM
 
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Sharon,

I have been making a webpage announcing DS's birth, and preparing a list of email addresses of all relevant people, so that when he is born, we can just slap some pictures on the website, and send out an email to the pre-prepared list.

I also want to get a book on photography and practice my photography skills so I don't butcher our newborn pictures!

Hypatia
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#9 of 21 Old 08-01-2003, 01:00 PM - Thread Starter
 
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thanks everyone! These are great suggestions. I think I'll definitely rent a bunch of movies...that's about all I have energy for in the evenings! I don't have a baby book yet, so maybe I'll go hunt one down (hey, that means a trip to the bookstore! )
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#10 of 21 Old 08-01-2003, 02:37 PM
 
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Those last weeks of waiting are so intense! I spent as much quality time with DH as possible. You will both be devoting so much time to the new babe that getting a little extra time together now will be great.

Also, if you are feeling particuarly sexual right now take advantage of it because after the baby comes that may or may not be the case.

I wrote letters to my baby. I triple checked that I had everything that I needed. I went out to eat and to the movies. I had my hair cut. I relaxed. GOOD LUCK!
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#11 of 21 Old 08-01-2003, 04:40 PM
 
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The one thing I really miss is being able to lie down and go to sleep whenever I feel the urge, and know nothing was going to interrupt me.

I would suggest you nap whenever you want to, and let out a great appreciative sigh as you sink into the pillows. Ah, I miss that.
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#12 of 21 Old 08-01-2003, 06:29 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally posted by nataliekat
and let out a great appreciative sigh as you sink into the pillows. Ah, I miss that.

Now NatalieKat...don't exaggerate & scare Sharon -- I've been able to do this since Ian has been born -- twice! :LOL
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#13 of 21 Old 08-01-2003, 07:10 PM
 
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Sharon -- I don't know if you might appreciate baby book suggestions -- but this is the one I bought and I loved it with my first babe. So much, in fact -- that I bought it again for my 2nd!

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg...books&n=507846
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#14 of 21 Old 08-01-2003, 09:02 PM
 
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Great suggestions here. I too had a few extra "what now?"days before my baby was born since he was late.

My boyfriend and I went out to the movies a lot and made sure to get in a few nice dinners - alone and with friends. I got my hair cut and got massaged by my doula, who also does prenatal massage. I also hung out a bit in bookstores since this is one of my favorite activities and a place I go for comfort. I shopped for a very special blank journal book to use as a diary after the baby's birth - since I am a big-time diary keeper and having a special new book seemed like a good way to mark an occasion and create a caesura after my 'old life' pre-motherhood. (I ended up finding a beautiful hand-tooled leather book at B&N with an intricate Celtic/Arabic-style design.) I also tended to and maintained my online diary since I figured there might not be much time for that later.

I started sorting photos for the baby book my good friend is making me (not done yet, so I couldn't do more on that).

I read about breastfeeding, read as far in The Baby Book as I could stand to go (it's a bit daunting to a not-yet-parent) and I made sure my boyfriend and I got some really good late-stage belly pics taken.

I was impatient too, but it was a really good time, those last few days before I went into labor. My boyfriend and I spent a lot of time sitting around and musing that our lives would soon change and simply enjoying one another's company. I feel a bit nostalgic now for the end of pregnancy (sounds crazy, I know!), uncomfortable though it could be. I'm glad I took the opportunity to savor that special time.
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#15 of 21 Old 08-02-2003, 12:39 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I did get a haircut the other day and WOW that was great!

Cinnamonamon, you're too funny!

I think the hardest part is getting my mind off of all the changes my body is going through and just getting on with my day. Part of me wants to just sit at home all day and rest and wait, but I know I need to keep up some kind of normal routine or else I'll drive myself crazy...especially if the baby decides to stay put past my due date!
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#16 of 21 Old 08-02-2003, 01:19 AM
 
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Thanks Sharon! I love coming here -- IRL my dh is the funny one...

I think we've all forgotten the most important thing you can do, though.. COME HERE! :LOL Your idea for the schedule is a great idea.

If you like to cook maybe you could plan some slightly more complex meals that you won't have a chance to cook afterwards. Then you can go to a nice grocery store (as opposed to the nearest one that doesn't smell bad!), and buy uber-fresh ingredients & just wander amongst all that yummy-ness.

Oh, & do this -- just for me: remember something you want, grab your wallet, sunglasses & keys, jump in the car & run to the store. Get what you need & be back home in 10 minutes.

Do not spend 20 minutes making a list to make sure you'll get everything. Do not spend 5 minutes making sure you have everything in the diaper bag you need. Do not get your child into the carseat only to find (after getting those @##$*%$ straps untwisted & correctly attached) that (s)he needs a diaper change. After changing said diaper & re-securing baby in seat, do not spend 2 minutes lugging it outside while trying not to bang your precious cargo against every doorway & corner all the way out to & into the car. After arriving at the store, do not spend 3 minutes struggling to pull your child out of the seat & get him/her situated in the sling. Do not watch your child grab your wallet & dump everything onto the floor while the clerk & next customer stand & stare at you trying to bend over to pick everything up. Lastly, when you are about to go back out to the car, (through the now pouring rain with no umbrella & only the tail of your sling to protect your child) do not feel compelled to hold back on the owner of the the stupid $100,000 tricked out Avalanche who feels the need to choose THAT moment to pull away from the next door liquor store (where it's been illegally parked for 15 minutes) & almost run you over, 'cause hey -- you're just a women with a big bag & small infant in your arms wearing BRIGHT WHITE with a BRIGHT WHITE sling DIRECTLY in your headlights -- why should that be noticed? Oh yea -- and when getting back in the car, do not worry about your little hairs at the base of your neck being pulled out by your child who wants to be held & not strapped into a seat again -- then make sure not to almost tip your child's seat upside down (child still inside it of course) when trying to lean over to lock your vehicle door once you get home while also trying to shield your child from the rain & not drop your bag & purse & diaper bag...

Hmmm... see what a trip to the store for popcorn will turn into -- see? Okay, it isn't that bad all the time. And for the record, my ds has been peacefully sleeping by himself for about an hour now & I don't expect him to wake for another 5 hours, when he'll go right back to sleep after a quick nursing.

Still -- make that popcorn run -- enjoy it.
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#17 of 21 Old 08-02-2003, 02:04 AM
 
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I have been making a webpage announcing DS's birth, and preparing a list of email addresses of all relevant people, so that when he is born, we can just slap some pictures on the website, and send out an email to the pre-prepared list.
2nd this! We were overwhelmed by reqests for pics (why can't people bring their own cameras & then email *me* the pics. ) Anyway, if i would have known, we could have taken a web page design class instead of the Bradley class!

best wishes! maria
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#18 of 21 Old 08-02-2003, 09:35 AM
 
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We were overwhelmed by reqests for pics
Especially if you live out of state! We have gone through $150 in print cartridges & photo paper in less than 6 months sending pics to my mom, his mom, his dad, his ex-stepmom, my gparents, his gparents, his aunt, my sibs, etc. etc. etc.

And the worst part is -- he has a website with 100 odd pics on it! Only a couple of the people actually are internet saavy. So be ready for that one -- I'm stuck in a rut where I send 20-some pics out every 2 months to all those people!

How're you feelin?
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#19 of 21 Old 08-02-2003, 04:39 PM
 
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I assembled, addressed and stamped my birth annoucements. All I need to do post baby was insert the relevent data and a photo and mail

I have 5 weeks pre due date and my dd was 10 days late...I was SOOO BOARD/Organized


Amy
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#20 of 21 Old 08-03-2003, 06:25 PM
 
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Coming from a very sleep deprived SAH mommy of two very busy boys, I would suggest a ton of rest and pampering (and doing all the things that would be tough to do with a baby). Go get a massage, see movies at the theater, go to dinner with friends at a very baby unfriendly quiet restaurant, take long baths, get a pedicure, lounge around, NAP, sleep through the night and stretch (something with four in a bed I don't get to do much!), enjoy you time. I remember someone telling me once that having a child was life changing not because it was hard work but because for the first time your heart is in someone else's body. And the worry begins. Take advantage of the few days you have left to worry about only yourself.

Did that make sense? Did I mention how sleep deprived I am? LOL!
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#21 of 21 Old 08-03-2003, 07:37 PM
 
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Ohhh yes a pedicure. This will make you smile at your toes as you bring your knees up to your chin during delivery.
Organize all your photos in chronilogical order in albums. Go to the library and check out cd's you have never heard of, but might be interested in. And just do what you are doing. Go within. Be still. Welcoming thoughts. It sounds lovely!!!
But I know how hard that waiting can be. I carry children to 42 weeks and beyond. The gestational period of an elephant....
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