In our 30s with Our First Babe - December - Page 17 - Mothering Forums

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#481 of 528 Old 12-28-2007, 03:26 PM
 
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Yeah, I hear that. I would be really frustrated too. Seems like it's especially hard to pump since she only wants to sleep ON you.

I wonder if going back to work might help with the mastitis issue since you can pump without distraction. Hopefully that will be your silver lining.

Good luck. So sorry.
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#482 of 528 Old 12-28-2007, 03:30 PM
 
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Hi, everyone.
I've been lurking and thought I'd say hello.

I was on MDC a lot before I had my babe in June, but since then have not been on at all! I'm finally getting back into it, and I'm glad I found this thread.

I'm 35 and had my first Babe in June. A little girl. She is the best - very easy going, happy, healthy. I couldn't ask for more. I had planned on staying home with her after she was born, but I haven't yet been able to quit my job. We have the best nanny, and we don't have any family around, so it is such a relief to have someone I can rely on. I guess I'm thinking that if I quit my job (and therefore we wouldn't have the nanny), then if we needed someone to take care of her, we wouldn't have that. So, I'm sort of floating in between somewhere right now of "I'm a working mother, trying to AP in the evening and on weekends," and "I'm quitting my job tomorrow." :

Since going back to work (when LO was 4-1/2 mos. old), my milk supply decreased drastically (I had also gone on the South Beach Diet at that time. I lost a lot of weight in 6 weeks, but also lost most of my milk. ) So, we've been struggling with that. I still pump and nurse her, but I'd say she only gets a total of 4-6 oz. from me a day, the rest is formula. I've had a hard time dealing with that.

And, we're starting to think of TTC #2, and with that comes thinking about VBAC, since I had to have an unplanned c/s with my DD. I'm not ready to put the research time into it yet, but I also don't think I'm emotionally ready for a VBAC (or a birth in any way, to be honest.)

Lots of other stories, too, but those are my big ones in a nutshell!

Happy New Year to you all.
Jen

PS - LipGloss Mama - I'm in Long Island, too! Where are you?
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#483 of 528 Old 12-28-2007, 03:33 PM
 
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Hi Jen!

I had a c/s too, and at 4.5 mos there was no way I could have thought about having another.

I am looking into VBAC's now and we are planning on TTC sometime in the next 9 mos or so. (We change our minds a lot)

We'll see what happens.

Just wanted to welcome you!
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#484 of 528 Old 12-28-2007, 03:48 PM
 
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Jen! I had an unplanned (but NOT emergency) C-section too, baby flipped to frank breech during our homebirth. I'll research VBAC someday but it's too soon to even think about it!

Haven't been on as much lately, my mom's here visiting which has been really nice. She's really good with him and having lots of fun. DH is also back to work so that leaves me with less online time

Baby's waking up, bye!
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#485 of 528 Old 12-28-2007, 04:43 PM
 
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CJ... I'm with ya! I'm starting my Bikram yoga again New Year's Day (a girlfriend is going with me so I can't chicken out). I was a total yoga addict before pregnancy but the heat was too much after that, so it's been a long time. The McD's runs need to stop, it's just that it's so convenient, YK? I cut myself some slack during pregnancy and after babe came (so did DH actually) but I'm tired of being... um... well, bigger. (I resolved to stop calling myself fat cuz it's just not nice and my body just did this amazing thing for me, having a baby, so I have to be nice to it ) I'm so tempted every time I see a diet ad but the thing is, ever since I started just eating what my body wanted (during pregnancy and after) my tastes have become quit healthy and I no longer binge at all. So I'm afraid to "diet" per se because I feel like I'll create the diet/binge weight gain/loss cycle all over again. But, I'm all for avoiding junk more and increasing exercise now that I'm feeling more healed from my c-section (it'll be 5 weeks tomorrow). So yeah, I'm with you on that!

Elizabeth I'm so sorry, it's just not fair. I love BFing too. DH gave Ollie his first bottle (first since those chumps at the hospital convinced me to formula feed him anyhow) this a.m. so I could sleep longer, and he drank it down and was able to latch no problem after that, but I still felt a little sad to miss the bonding time, and that was just one feeding, YK? I hope it clears up again and you get some answers.

Pie... mothers! Augh! I'm glad you got to ski though. I used to cc ski as a kid in MT. Such great exercise!

We're meeting a babysitter tomorrow who might be able to come around for a few hours a day next week to help me out so I can nap, and practice, once mom leaves and DH is at work 40 hours/week. She has a family of her own too, so isn't looking for evenings but at least there's a solution for next week, if she agrees and we like her. $17 an hour, yowza!
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#486 of 528 Old 12-28-2007, 05:55 PM
 
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s s s Elizabeth
I totally understand what you're going through! My supply is all over the place. I can't pump enough. DS isn't patient, it's either too fast or too slow. Today my left breast really hurts and DS was all fussy with it and the pump can't drain it
The only saving grace for the day is DS gained 9 ounces in 10 days which puts him at 11 lbs. 3 ounces! Yee Haw! Of course, the ped wants me to keep doing what I'm doing which includes supplimentation with the Nutramigen and half the day at the pump. But whatever keeps the weight up and the spirits high.
Again more s Eilzabeth. Hang in there mama!

SAHM and loving it with DH, DS (8/4/2007) and DS (10/10/2010)
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#487 of 528 Old 12-28-2007, 06:18 PM
 
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17 an hour, yowza!
more thsan manhattan!!
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#488 of 528 Old 12-28-2007, 06:20 PM
 
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Seems like it's especially hard to pump since she only wants to sleep ON you.
my problem
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#489 of 528 Old 12-28-2007, 06:24 PM
 
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elizabeth, u r doing great! don't quit! last night i was dying of another plugged duct, dh had to tell me over and over that i was a great mommy, i swear the pain was worse than labor bc it was in the aereola again. today fine. my mw says i'm jusy one of those women who r prone 2 plugged ducts/mastitis. my aunt had lots too. i take soya lecithin to prevent per lll, not helping tho.
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#490 of 528 Old 12-28-2007, 08:11 PM
 
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CJ... I'm with ya! I'm starting my Bikram yoga again New Year's Day (a girlfriend is going with me so I can't chicken out).
Please move to Sacramento so I can start Bikram again? I need to get back into yoga, especially bikram, but I make excuse after excuse after excuse.

My entire back and neck were doing so great when I did Bikram. (Not to mention how strong the rest of me was)

Good for you. Maybe I'll be your virtual bikram buddy. We can talk about poses and stuff.
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#491 of 528 Old 12-28-2007, 08:50 PM
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Hi Jen! I had a June baby too, and she's also happy, healthy, and easy going. And she just keeps getting more fun every day - she crawled (really crawled, not just belly scooted or lunged) yesterday, which was exciting! And a little terrifying, since we're not so much with the babyproofing yet.
I also went back to work at 4 1/2 months, and so far it's been going ok, though I'm lucky in that I work from home a lot with my job.

Elizabeth, . I'm so sorry to hear about your BFing issues! I had one friend who finally had to stop BFing because of repeated mastitis. It just doesn't seem fair, when you work and try so hard to make it work. I think you just have to know that whatever you decide, your LO will be fine. Even if it means that breastfeeding isn't the right thing at this point. And she'll benefit so much from the milk you've already given her.

Pie, I'm so glad you got to ski at least a little bit! That would drive me nuts if I were in a beautiful place with snow and couldn't get out to x-country. I'm hoping to go tomorrow, in fact... My mom is the opposite - always encouraging me to get out, and to get Willa used to being with other people. It also helps I think that she's as comfortable with DH as she is with me (he's home a lot since he's an actor, and is REALLy good with babies), so while we're out in Colorado, for instance, we've been swapping baby-watching duties and letting each other get out to ski or enjoy the mountains. Tomorrow I'm hoping the two of us can maybe get out for a x-country or downhill ski together while my mom watches Willa.
My mom is so into natural parenting in some ways - she had natural home births with my brother and me in the 70s, did babywearing with her own homemade backpack, cloth diapered, did all homemade babyfood and was into organic before most people knew what it was, breastfed both of us, etc. But she is definitely into the importance of the mother being able to have a life and get other things done while looking after kids, and tends to be an advocate of playpen time, a sleep schedule, occasional CIO if the baby is waking up too much, etc. We don't agree on everything, but I like that there's so much she does understand about my parenting. She's also the opposite of MIL when it comes to giving "things' to the baby. She's anti all plastic, annoying, loud baby toys, and at this age, really doesn't think many toys are necessary at all - she's way more into cardboard boxes, measuring spoons, homemade things with pockets, found items, etc. For Christmas she gave Willa a couple books and a couple cute finger puppets of realistic field mouse and owl, and that's it - she did a lot to try and avoid "stuff" overload with us, and feels the same way with her granddaughter - she's more into just having good, creative interaction with her.

We finally made it through the trip from hell - we got to the house in Colorado after 3 am (5 am the time we were coming from). Willa did great, all things considered - she slept on me in the ergo, in the carseat on the drive here - but she REALLy wanted to be in a bed, and she kept waking up and having a hard time getting back to sleep. And DH and I were wiped the next day, since, of course, Willa woke up ready for play at 6:30 am. But she's adjusted, as have we, and it's fun being out here. Back home, and back to work, on Monday....
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#492 of 528 Old 12-28-2007, 10:11 PM
 
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Nylecoj... you do Bikram too? Are there classes near you? I am in love with that yoga, it helped me so much when my body felt so broken down from old injuries that I couldn't do any other exercise... when I'm not doing it I have to take ibuprofen for my back all the time. Did you know Bikram now has an advanced series? They teach it at my old studio, but you have to be able to do every expression of every pose in the original series to be admitted, so I have to work on my standing head-to-knee (I look down at my knee and just fall over), and toe stand which is hard cuz I have bad knees and toes. Sigh... maybe someday...
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#493 of 528 Old 12-28-2007, 10:32 PM
 
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Thanks for the support. you guys are awesome. typing 1 handed - dd is nap/nursing on my lap. i'm so glad she can nurse with me just holding her on my lap with one arm finally!

saw the np today - she's doing a milk sample and suspects a lingering mastitis and something other than candida. she suspects switching to mostly bottles when i go back to work may help, too, since i'll pump longer at regular intervals vs. dd snacking all day. i have thyriod issues that are minor, but may also be contributing to the crazy supply issues. she basically promised me that we'll figure this out - i'm SO happy we found her since she's basically my doctor and dd's ped at this point!

she was horrified our ped wanted to put dd on reglan - she upped our zantac and will call in prilosec if that doesn't work.

the good news is that dd's poop was blood free and looked much healthier to her! i'm relieved, but freaked about the possibility of a gluten-intolerance. That would be so hard long-term...
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#494 of 528 Old 12-28-2007, 10:49 PM
 
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s s s Elizabeth
I totally understand what you're going through! My supply is all over the place. I can't pump enough. DS isn't patient, it's either too fast or too slow. Today my left breast really hurts and DS was all fussy with it and the pump can't drain it
The only saving grace for the day is DS gained 9 ounces in 10 days which puts him at 11 lbs. 3 ounces! Yee Haw! Of course, the ped wants me to keep doing what I'm doing which includes supplimentation with the Nutramigen and half the day at the pump. But whatever keeps the weight up and the spirits high.
Again more s Eilzabeth. Hang in there mama!
great job on the weight gain! nylecoj was so right about how hard pumping is with a baby who wants to be held... if it makes you feel any better we were able to stop supplementing after a few weeks. your lo is almost as big as dd!
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#495 of 528 Old 12-29-2007, 01:11 AM
 
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great job on the weight gain! nylecoj was so right about how hard pumping is with a baby who wants to be held... if it makes you feel any better we were able to stop supplementing after a few weeks. your lo is almost as big as dd!
Thanks!
Although, DS was born Aug.4 due Sept. 1st, it's crazy to think he'll be 5 months and is just getting to be 11 lbs. BUT I say to myself, he's gaining and after trying Sooooo hard to ebf, I was thinking that maybe this is everyone's happy medium. Some nursing, some pumping and some supplement. Not the perfect serniero but if it keeps DS gaining, happy and at the breast half the time... The other combos didn't seem to work and exclusively pumping isn't nessary since DS can suck better (and I can't even pump what he needs now, part time). So yes, perhaps this will be the road, not perfect but better than not bfing at all.
By the time all of this works out, he'll probably start grabbing for our food. He's already watching us closely when we eat:

SAHM and loving it with DH, DS (8/4/2007) and DS (10/10/2010)
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#496 of 528 Old 12-29-2007, 01:23 AM
 
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Hi! I'm new. I'm not a mom yet, but will be next month. I'm 31.5 years old and my first baby (a boy) is due 1/26.

Have you seen the updated user agreement yet?
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#497 of 528 Old 12-29-2007, 01:48 PM
 
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Hi! I'm new. I'm not a mom yet, but will be next month. I'm 31.5 years old and my first baby (a boy) is due 1/26.
Welcome and congrats! Did you also check out the pregnant in our 30s thread? Several of us "graduated" from that one and ended up here! Don't let us scare you - motherhood is wonderful!
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#498 of 528 Old 12-29-2007, 01:51 PM
 
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Thanks!
Although, DS was born Aug.4 due Sept. 1st, it's crazy to think he'll be 5 months and is just getting to be 11 lbs. BUT I say to myself, he's gaining and after trying Sooooo hard to ebf, I was thinking that maybe this is everyone's happy medium. eat:
Whatever works!!! And doh - how did I forget that you were here first?! What is it with the near-term babies and eating??? It's like the one thing that they seem to have in common - they just don't get bfing! DD still has a horribly weak suck, which seems to be why she's refusing to eat once the foremilk stops pouring into her mouth and she won't keep working for the hindmilk.

Guess my overactive letdown is why she liked mommy better than bottles, so maybe it's not an all around bad thing...
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#499 of 528 Old 12-29-2007, 03:45 PM
 
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Question to all of you who have crossed this bridge before me: How much breastmilk do you give to a baby for a missed feeding? We've introduced a bottle and it seemed like 2 oz. wasn't much but 4 oz. was a lot... it held him for a few hours (and I slept! )

How much do you give your baby?
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#500 of 528 Old 12-29-2007, 04:33 PM
 
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Question to all of you who have crossed this bridge before me: How much breastmilk do you give to a baby for a missed feeding? We've introduced a bottle and it seemed like 2 oz. wasn't much but 4 oz. was a lot... it held him for a few hours (and I slept! )

How much do you give your baby?
generally, my DS only takes about 3 oz max EBM, and he's 5.5 months old. He'll eat every 2-3 hours, though, so I think it's more akin to directly BF that way. He's taken as much as 5 oz if it's a sleep feed (I try to feed him before we go to bed on work nights so he doesn't wake up at 4 when we need up at 5), and when he's feeling well, sometimes he'll take 4 oz.

I read about FF babies taking 6-7 oz bottles (or more) at my son's age and wonder if I'm doing something wrong, but since he's a refluxer, I don't like for his belly to spend any time empty- it hurts him.
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#501 of 528 Old 12-29-2007, 04:45 PM
 
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Elizabeth- so sorry about the continued breast woes! I really hope this new doc is able to help. You're such an awesome mama for being this dedicated to BF through all of this! Think about how many mamas would have thrown in the towel after just a day of what you've been suffering through, KWIM?

You're doing a fantastic job!
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#502 of 528 Old 12-30-2007, 12:39 PM
 
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Well our babysitter never came! Just didn't show. : So it looks like it's just me next week. I got spoiled with Paul being home for so long and then with Mom being here, now it's just all me. .....sigh.... I'll never sleep again....
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#503 of 528 Old 12-30-2007, 01:24 PM
 
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Julia - whoa, $17/hr and she doesn't even show up?? I hope you find someone soon...

This may sound weird but I am ready to go back to work! Our dual nannies start next week and I am kind of looking forward to the routine. I have to start teaching again though, am a little afraid of that.
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#504 of 528 Old 12-30-2007, 02:40 PM
 
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Hello!

A quick post to say will my hair EVER STOP FALLING OUT? I'm in no danger of going bald as I have the thickest hair ever, but you should see the GIANT hairballs after each shower... the tumbleweeds of my hair around the house... the hair always curled around the baby's little fingers... I got it cut above my shoulders but obviously that was not short enough. Anyone else having this problem? CJ, when you cut your hair did it stop falling out?

We had a very fussy Christmas -- teething, we think? -- and were double glad not to have gone anywhere, even though we're totally in hot water with MIL and SIL now. Also, baby didn't poop for 5 days, but was in a great mood after she did! Also: I have never been skiing. Ever. Except for water. And am jealous.

I'm so impressed by the commitment of all you mamas with feeding issues! You rock! Also, you help me to be SLIGHTLY less whiney about my mundanely sore nipples.
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#505 of 528 Old 12-30-2007, 05:13 PM
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Also, baby didn't poop for 5 days, but was in a great mood after she did!
Man, we're having the opposite issue here. For the last two weeks, Willa has been pooping 7-8 times a day, sometimes more, including in the middle of the night. It's hard to remember the last time I changed a diaper that was just wet, not poopy. As a result, she got her first bad diaper rash, though it seems to be clearing up now. We've stopped doing any solid foods since we thought that might be contributing, but it's still going on.... Guess we just have a poop machine! I'm looking forward to her getting back to a more normal 1-3 poops a day, though....
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#506 of 528 Old 12-30-2007, 05:18 PM
 
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i want to brag that i signed up for a week (free) gym membership. now to get there!

julia, omg i hate that babysitter for standing you up! we are in desperate need of some babysitting here too.
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#507 of 528 Old 12-31-2007, 12:28 AM
 
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Nylecoj... you do Bikram too? Are there classes near you? I am in love with that yoga, it helped me so much when my body felt so broken down from old injuries that I couldn't do any other exercise... when I'm not doing it I have to take ibuprofen for my back all the time. Did you know Bikram now has an advanced series? They teach it at my old studio, but you have to be able to do every expression of every pose in the original series to be admitted, so I have to work on my standing head-to-knee (I look down at my knee and just fall over), and toe stand which is hard cuz I have bad knees and toes. Sigh... maybe someday...
I haven't gone to classes in probably 2 years.

I was doing the poses for a couple of months after dd was born, but then sleep deprivation kicked in bad-like and I'm just starting to feel like getting back into it again.

My back and neck hurt every day though and I always feel so much better doing it, even if it's just practicing the poses at home. I cannot do the first part of toe stand (blanking on what it's called) because one my hips is really tight and just will not open up.

That advanced series sounds really neat. Someday I'd like to get my sheeit together and take a weekend retreat. They do have classes here too, about 15 minutes away from me ....

I need to start going again.

Also, I can't believe your babysitter didn't show up! Bad Bad Sitter!!!

Elizabeth -I'm so glad to hear about your NP. She sounds wonderful!

Minnow - You are funny. Cutting my hair made no difference whatsoever with it falling out. Also, dd went from pooping like 8 times a day to not going for 6 days without any warning on a camping trip. It slowly regulated after that, but it was very weird at first.

UGH. She is screaming right now. I'd better get upstairs and offer her some boobie.
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#508 of 528 Old 12-31-2007, 02:19 AM
 
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Julia- that sitter sucks! I worry about the same thing happening- living around here has totally eroded my trust in people (I'm a southern girl by birth and upbringing).

We should definitely try to get together for coffee sometime- I actually work in ballston, but I'm putting in my 2 weeks' notice Thursday. Yay! We're moving to CO at the end of the month, but I'd love to try to meet before then.

Speaking of CO- acp, I know you're from that area (those posts were amillion years ago, and life has been a mess here)- but which part? DH is working on Ft. Carson, and we're hoping to rent a house further out around Divide/Woodland Park. He doesn't want to live too close to the base, as he hates military towns (after being stuck in them while he was in the military).

Any good colorado advice would be most welcome!!

So- we decided to take the plunge. We're going to be living off of my husband's income at first, and hopefully for a while. It'll take some convincing to get him to sign on to me being a SAHM for anything beyond RSV season, but I think I can make the numbers work. If not, I'm going to try to get something either part- time, or a WAH job doing case management or utilization review (I'm an RN).

Life with Lucien has been a bit rough. Friday before Christmas, we had another followup at the pediatrician, and saw a new doctor. He decided Lucien's ears looked fine, but his severe torticollis had reappeared, and he still had a fever. This new doc freaked a bit and sent us to the hospital for a stat ultrasound of DS's neck and more bloodwork. I'll spare you the details, but we were there all day and lots of screaming was involved.

The reason he freaked out, I think, is that he was worried there might be a tumor in DS's neck causing the fever and head tilt, along with his feeding difficulties. He never said this, but that's what I gathered from the ordered tests. We found that he has 8 enlarged lymph nodes now (instead of the 1 that the CT a few weeks ago showed), and his labs were relatively normal. Dunno if I mentioned this before, but one of his immunology labs came back abnormal, so it's looking like his immune system could be the culprit in all of this. Whether it's an actual immunodeficiency or just another result of prematurity has yet to be seen. I have a follow-up with the immunologist on the 7th, which the regular pedi is routinely calling to make sure I know about. I'm a mite worried about lymphoma, but his white count isn't nearly low enough.

His anemia is getting worse, which prompted me to start giving him cereal, which I swore I'd never do. But if ever a kid was to benefit from it, it's him. The only good thing about the stuff is that it's iron-fortified. We're doing the disgusting poly-vi-sol with iron, too, but he manages to spew that out every time, and won't take a thing if I mix it in something. I'd love to do the more natural BLW, but it's not in the cards for us right now, I think.

Anyway- with a week off from day care, he's been feeling better, at least. He still has the torticollis, but the only thing left (and this will probably happen next week) is putting him in the hospital to start over finding out what's wrong. Ugh. Lucky for me that I'm giving notice at my job, as missing that last day before Christmas infuriated my boss. (she didn't even ask why we had to take him to the hospital. lovely.) Oh, we did 3 days of IM antibiotics, which didn't clear up the infection- it just gave him diarrhea (12 times a day, what fun).

I'm working tomorrow, although I expect they'll let us out early. DH is staying home to take DS to his follow-up appointment (let's hope they don't send him straight to the hospital). I'm tired, I hate my stupid breast pump, and I find myself getting frustrated with DS sometimes- I'm hardcore stressing about moving with him, especially the idea of flying with his ear issues and infection susceptibility. At least he's eating more, although we used the last of our frozen stash and may need to dip into a little formula tomorrow (if he'll even take it, which I doubt).

I *so* love being his mama, I really do. But I'm also really, really tired.

Sorry to pop in and rant so much, y'all.
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#509 of 528 Old 12-31-2007, 10:59 AM
 
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Oh! Rachel! s s s

SAHM and loving it with DH, DS (8/4/2007) and DS (10/10/2010)
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#510 of 528 Old 12-31-2007, 11:12 AM
 
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Rachel, my goodness! How very scary and frustrating and sad. I'll PM you my phone number and if and when you get a chance please call, and if there's anything I can do to help, since I'm in the area, please ask! Congrats on giving 2 weeks notice, how cool Your boss sounds lovely

Lane... my Bradley teacher told me her babe didn't poop for 17 days once, she freaked out but the docs were like, no biggie ??

So I was on deck again last night and took over DH's normal job of putting Ollie to bed. I suck at it. It seems like the only way he'll go to bed for any length of time is if he has a good long cry first, and I keep soothing him and nursing him all night so he doesn't cry, so when I put him to bed then he wakes up every hour or two all night, so that by 3:30 a.m. I was shaking DH awake, crying, saying "I can't do this". Man I suck. I can't even handle one night putting him to bed. But now I'm reading all these things about how babies NEED to cry and I should just hold him while he cries and let him get it out, but I'm not sure what's worse... waking up constantly or listening to him scream for 20 minutes at a time. Is this normal? Jeez!

Yes it sucks about the sitter, I think I'll give my friend Catherine a call. She has an au pair (ours doesn't come for two months) who is willing to do extra babysitting, except I'd have to bring him to her house. Maybe she'd let me bring him and then take a nap at her house? I think I'll ask if we can't find anyone else. I'm so sleep deprived and I don't hold up well like this... I get very cranky! I mean beyond cranky.. non-functioning, I-can't-do-this cranky. Bah.
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