14 month old won't drink milk...help please - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 24 Old 12-27-2007, 01:26 PM - Thread Starter
 
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My dd (14 months) stopped breast feeding about a month ago, she weaned herself and I am still a little sad about it. Before she weaned (and probably why she weaned from the breast) we were giving her goat milk in a bottle at night and maybe once during the day. She has also been drinking water out of a sigg water bottle for 6 months, and I have never given her juice.

But we recently stopped giving her the bottle on her own cues (she kept pushing it away). So I have been starting to put milk in her sigg and she won't have ANYTHING to do with it. So I broke down and got her a traditional "sippy cup" thinking that would convince her, but no. I have tried regular cow milk, and even toddler organic formula but all she will drink is water in her sigg.

I really feel like she should be getting some milk. Should I reintroduce the bottle ( I really don't want to)?? A friend recommended putting a little blackstrap molassas in the goat milk, but I really don't want to "sugar" it up.

She is a good eater but in general won't really eat cheese or yogurt, never has. I do feed her lots of broccoli so she is getting some calcium there, but that's about it. Should I just keep feeding her a well balanced diet and not worry about the milk thing, but keep offering it and hope that one day she will drink it. What else are my options??

Although I don't like using the word "should", what *should* I do??
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#2 of 24 Old 12-27-2007, 01:58 PM
 
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I hate should as well

What *I* would do is pull out all the stops and try everything under the sun to get her back on the breast. She is really far too young to be weaned.

best of luck,

-Angela
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#3 of 24 Old 12-27-2007, 06:08 PM
 
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What *I* would do is pull out all the stops and try everything under the sun to get her back on the breast.

That's what I was going to suggest.

Doing my best every day with DH , DD (11) , and DS (4)

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#4 of 24 Old 12-27-2007, 06:14 PM
 
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That would be the healthiest choice - if a little one is nursing even just 4x a day, they don't need any other milk. Will she still latch?

And really - entire cultures thrive without drinking milk. It's not a necessary part of the human diet.

You may consider looking into ways of preparing foods that increase the nutrient availability so that it makes the minerals more easily absorbed. That plus feeding nutrient-dense foods in general and I would not worry so much, especially if you can get some breastmilk into her.
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#5 of 24 Old 12-27-2007, 07:41 PM - Thread Starter
 
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She won't latch, I try every now and then. She was never a comfort nurser, and never once pulled on my shirt or gave signs that she wanted to nurse, it was always me who would put her on.

I totally appreicate your suggestions and I too agree that nursing would be the best option, but to be honest I am looking for other suggestions.

Do some kids just not like milk? Is milk really necessary?
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#6 of 24 Old 12-27-2007, 08:07 PM
 
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what about pumping your milk and giving her that? Even if she won't latch on, pumped breastmilk would be better than anything else you could give her!
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#7 of 24 Old 12-27-2007, 08:20 PM
 
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I have to agree with the pumping idea, but I also wanted to say that some kids just don't care for milk. My older dd breastfed for years, but she would spit out cows milk, and only drank goats milk for a small time. We tried rice "milk", and now she uses almond "milk".

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#8 of 24 Old 12-27-2007, 11:57 PM
 
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what about pumping your milk and giving her that? Even if she won't latch on, pumped breastmilk would be better than anything else you could give her!
A good idea, but I wouldn't choose it. I despise pumping and find it painful. But that's me...

At least she drinks a lot of water, right?

Doing my best every day with DH , DD (11) , and DS (4)

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#9 of 24 Old 12-28-2007, 12:47 AM
 
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If she weaned herself, perhaps she's ready. I wouldn't agonize over getting her nursing again, personally (fwiw, my 1st nursed for 32 months so it's not like I'm opposed to extended nursing-just don't think I'd try to force it).

Humans, once they give up human milk, don't need to drink animal milk, no matter what the dairy council says.

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#10 of 24 Old 12-28-2007, 12:52 AM
 
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I weaned at 12 months. To this day 31 years later, I will never drink milk. It is the most digusting thing to me to drink another mammals milk. I will never even offer it to ds. He eats his green and tofu and if want some rice milk then fine. I would pump if I were you and offer her that. Maybe she will want to hop back on. You never know. Sounds like she may of had a nursing strike.

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#11 of 24 Old 12-28-2007, 12:53 AM
 
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Milk is really just a source of protein and calcium. Surely you can find other ways to get these nutrients into her without milk. I wouldn't force the issue if she is so adamant.
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#12 of 24 Old 12-28-2007, 01:00 AM
 
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I third (or fourth or fifth) the pumped breastmilk. And if she only drink it out of a bottle and not the SIGG, then I'd put it in a bottle. I wouldn't worry at all about reintroducing a bottle if it got her to drink pumped breastmilk.

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#13 of 24 Old 12-28-2007, 01:03 AM
 
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If she weaned herself, perhaps she's ready.
She didn't wean herself. Mama said baby was given goat's milk bottles which likely contributed to her weaning.

Tofie ~ mama to DD1, DD2 and Pookie v3 debuting December 2011
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#14 of 24 Old 12-28-2007, 01:12 AM
 
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Dd drinks dramatically more milk when we have raw milk. It just tastes better.
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#15 of 24 Old 12-28-2007, 01:13 AM
 
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I was just thinking about cholesterol, does anyone recall at what age the body starts producing its own? A baby needs it to produce nerve tissue in the brain. In the case of a baby that weaned prematurely, I would think that baby would still need a form of cholesterol if they are not getting it from breastmilk. Off the top of my head, I don't know where else baby could get that cholesterol. Does anyone else know and can provide the info?

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#16 of 24 Old 12-28-2007, 11:20 AM
 
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egg yolks? I remember doing this with DD for cholesterol - raw egg yolks in her bottle.

I do not remember the facts off the top of my head but I'll try to post back later with the link about it!
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#17 of 24 Old 12-28-2007, 12:58 PM
 
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my kids have not ever been milk drinkers. never saw a need to push it on them, either. They have it with cereal at breakfast, and my toddler sometimes asks for a sippy cup of it, but my older 2 never wanted milk as a drink. Just wanted to let you know they are fine with not having been milk drinkers, hasnt contributed negatively to their development.
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#18 of 24 Old 12-28-2007, 01:42 PM
 
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Just wanted to echo the notion that your child does not actually need MILK to be healthy, just the essential nutrients in it which are found in other dietary items.

Also, I do agree that some babies do wean themselves quite early, despite our best intentions. Breastfeeding is wonderful, but re-lactating and forcing a kid to BF in many cases isn't possible, desireable, or IMO, worth the angst. The suggestion of this "remedy" to the OP's simple dietary question makes me want to defend her, and I'll probably go all tangential on here....

My son never really liked nursing, in fact went on a 5 week breast strike at 4mos. old, I fought that by pumping like crazy b/c he was so young, he finally went back to only nursing at night.
Now at 10 mos, he's adamantly done with it. Yes, I wanted to keep going, and tried my best, but he's also got his own mind about it. He still eats healthy food and is thriving, so we have chosen not to fight this battle.
(Oh, and he has a metabolic disorder. We didn't have the luxury of allowing him to wait till he was really hungry to enforce breastfeeding, so we use formula when needed. Formula actually saved his life, but that's for a different thread.)

Isn't a healthy, happy, thriving child, (no matter what they drank in infancy) a more tangible and valuable end result of being a good parent?

I think we all just want our kids to grow up with an healthy long-term relationship with food, so choose your battles carefully.
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#19 of 24 Old 12-28-2007, 01:53 PM
 
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She won't latch, I try every now and then. She was never a comfort nurser, and never once pulled on my shirt or gave signs that she wanted to nurse, it was always me who would put her on.

I totally appreicate your suggestions and I too agree that nursing would be the best option, but to be honest I am looking for other suggestions.

Do some kids just not like milk? Is milk really necessary?
none of my kids have liked dairy milk. My 3rd ds did have cow milk in 50/50 with breast milk in a bottle when I was working and pg with baby #4 when he was in daycare, but he stopped that pretty quick and chose to go milk free from ages 2-4 he'll have milk in cereal now, but won't just drink a cup same with all the rest of my kids
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#20 of 24 Old 12-28-2007, 02:36 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks everyone! IrisV, I love what you said, thanks. The thought of whipping out the breast pump made me want to cry. My dd has never been in to nursing either. I miss the closeness of it, holding her still and sweetly in my arms, but I am ok to be done. I nursed her for over 12 months and feel good about that.

It is good to hear that they don't really need milk, I myself can't stand it. We eat a diet of organic whole food and she eats tons. She does have lots of pee diapers so I know she is hydrated. I do wish she would drink goat milk though, since it is the closest to breast milk. I will keep offering it to her, but not forcing. Thanks for the piece of mind ladies!!

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#21 of 24 Old 12-28-2007, 02:48 PM
 
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Just wanted to echo the notion that your child does not actually need MILK to be healthy, just the essential nutrients in it which are found in other dietary items.
If I may, I would like to clarify that when you said "milk", I think you meant "another species milk"?

Quote:
Also, I do agree that some babies do wean themselves quite early, despite our best intentions. Breastfeeding is wonderful, but re-lactating and forcing a kid to BF in many cases isn't possible, desireable, or IMO, worth the angst. The suggestion of this "remedy" to the OP's simple dietary question makes me want to defend her, and I'll probably go all tangential on here....
I don't see where anyone has told her to FORCE her baby to breastfeed. People have suggested that she see if baby will return to the breast. If baby would, this would be the the easiest way to ensure baby is getting the nutrients needed at this age. Pumping milk has been an alternative suggestion.

Quote:
We didn't have the luxury of allowing him to wait till he was really hungry to enforce breastfeeding, so we use formula when needed.
I am getting off topic now, but I wondered if you could tell me more about the portion I bolded? I am not sure if I understand this technique and I don't think I've heard of it. It just seems to me that waiting until a baby is REALLY hungry before the baby is fed, would turn a baby off of breastfeeding rather than enforce it. But I may be misunderstanding the technique you are describing. And I am NOT questioning your formula use, I am only inquiring about the method you described to keep a baby on the breast.

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#22 of 24 Old 12-28-2007, 07:44 PM
 
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I didn't use the term FORCE either. Please put yourself in another person's position and understand why the mere suggestion that her baby is way to young to wean, depite her efforts, is quite hurtful.

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If I may, I would like to clarify that when I am only inquiring about the method you described to keep a baby on the breast.
There wasn't any method, other than keep offering and try to make it nice and cozy again. We can not afford to let eating turn into a battle. We just have to make sure he ate every few hours, and if he was screaming, biting, or otherwise freaking out at the idea of nursing, we couldn't just keep trying w/o offering him a bottle as well. The emphasis here was that he ate something, not what he ate.

The point is that some babies do not want to nurse, they do wean. The OP (and me) are sad about that but have come to terms, and we've moved on to parenting in a broader sense rather than fixate on breastmilk, cows milk, or any other type of milk. Suggesting that she try again, or work harder at pumping was not what she was looking for, or helpful.

Sucessful extended breastfeeders have plenty of support here. It's only fair to come to the defense to offer comisseration and validation to others who've hit some snags.
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#23 of 24 Old 12-28-2007, 07:48 PM
 
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have you tryed letting her choose her own sippy cup? even if its covered in characters and plastic?

it worked with ds, he picked out a spongebob one. we also took out the valve in it.

Also, i would try pediasure, ds refused all milks, juices etc and would only drink water, but we tryed vanilla pediasure and he LOVES it.
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#24 of 24 Old 12-28-2007, 08:57 PM
 
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I didn't use the term FORCE either. Please put yourself in another person's position and understand why the mere suggestion that her baby is way to young to wean, depite her efforts, is quite hurtful.
You did use the term "force", I got it from your quote, please see below.
Quote:
Originally Posted by IrisV View Post
Breastfeeding is wonderful, but re-lactating and forcing a kid to BF in many cases isn't possible, desireable, or IMO, worth the angst.
I repeat that nobody told her to FORCE baby to the breast. People were offering the suggestion because she might not have known it existed. The OP did not say it was something she had tried, so perhaps she didn't know it was an option. I don't believe that giving someone options so they can make a choice, is hurtful. Once she said that her baby wouldn't take the breast, people then suggested pumping.

Quote:
There wasn't any method, other than keep offering and try to make it nice and cozy again. We can not afford to let eating turn into a battle. We just have to make sure he ate every few hours, and if he was screaming, biting, or otherwise freaking out at the idea of nursing, we couldn't just keep trying w/o offering him a bottle as well. The emphasis here was that he ate something, not what he ate.
I wasn't questioning you, I was only asking about the method you referred to. It sounded like someone was telling you to wait until the baby was starving before you offered the breast, in hopes that baby would take it due to desperation and hunger. It didn't sound like a pleasant method so I was actually quite relieved when you had said it wasn't something you had done.

Quote:
Suggesting that she try again, or work harder at pumping was not what she was looking for, or helpful.
The OP did not state that she had tried offering the breast or pumping or that she had no desire to do so, so how were people to know? She also asked "What else are my options?". I will say again, that I don't think it is hurtful to offer her many suggestions. As the suggestions are made and the OP responds, we get to know more about what she has tried and what her goals are, and can tailor our suggestions to further help. I think we would be doing her a great disservice if we knew of possible options, but didn't share them with her.

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