Tell me this is normal - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 11 Old 09-12-2003, 08:47 AM - Thread Starter
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Oka,y so my baby is only one week old but for the last two nights, she has been basically inconsolable for 3 or 4 entire hours leading up til 1 a.m., at which point she finally crashes and stays asleep until 7 a.m. or longer.

My first baby, though needy, was always comforted by nursing or just being held, so this whole crying thing is new for me and I am losing heart. I have tried the sling (walking my enighborhood at midnight w/ a screaming infant is bound to make me a very unpopular neighbor?!?!?!?) and it doesn't really do the trick -- sometimes even upsets her more. She wants to nurse but I don't have an endless milk supply and she seems to get frustrated by that. The binky, which occasionally works during the day, upsets her even more.

I am so sad for her -- she is PERFECT all day long until this meltdown period.

Any thoughts?
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#2 of 11 Old 09-12-2003, 09:01 AM
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This sounds like my DD when she was 4 weeks old up until she was 3 months old. It was very unexplainable. We walked with DD, held her, sometimes if we needed a break she'd go in the swing. Also try white noises. DD loved the sound of the shower and would stop crying for a little bit.

It's only temporary.
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#3 of 11 Old 09-12-2003, 09:40 AM
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Indeed it is only temporary, but even one night of it can feel like an eternity while you're going through it.

There is always a reason for a baby crying, but unfortunately we aren't always able to determine what it is.

If you are drinking or eating ANY dairy, quit!!! That can make a new baby (really up to 4 months or so) VERY uncomfortable.

Let her nurse whenever she wants and for however long. This will increase your milk supply. Also, the binki at her young age can actually interfere with establishing nursing.

Buy a yoga ball (a great big ball) ASAP!!! I've never heard of one baby who didn't love being bounced lightly on the ball. You just sit on the ball and hold your baby---while nursing or just holding---and then bounce lightly up and down. It works wonders!! You'll get tired of bouncing, but it's much better than the alternative.
I bought my at Walmart, but they're also at sporting goods stores. WELL WORTH the time and money (mine was only $15).

If you're washing her clothes or bed sheets in your laundry detergent then stop. You can use vinager or a very mild baby soap. The regular ones can make a baby itch all over.

Hang in there and seek support!!! It does pass, but I know it can be VERY hard for you and your sweet baby while it's going on.
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#4 of 11 Old 09-12-2003, 10:12 AM
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hang in there

have you tried


white noise -- vacuum, dryer, fan? -- my dd LOVED the vacuum noise from about 2 days till about 4 months.

swaddling her up? especially keeping her little hands and head all wrapped up. some babies really like having their hands held close to their bodies. it keeps the "startle reflex" from waking them up

unswaddling her?

motion of any on the yoga ball, mom walking (sounds like you tried this), swing, stroller, sling

some babies REALLY like motion when they are on their sides. Hold her on her side and bounce.

and maybe try several at the same time (and be persistent with trying)....meaning try
swaddling, bouncing and saying SHHHHH in her ear.

I agree with the above poster about nursing, nursing and more nursing. At this point the fact that she doesn't seem to like the binky CAN be a MAJOR positive toward developing a good milk supply...more sucking on you means more milk production. something that will help in the long run.

and maybe my final suggestion, is to find someone you can call in the middle of the night....your mom, your best friend, whoever. It can help (you) to have someone else to help you make it through the dark hours of the night.

Kristin -- mom of Erin (11/5/02) and Leah (9/29/05)
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#5 of 11 Old 09-12-2003, 02:26 PM
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Mine did that, too! But she at least had the "sense" to wait until she was 4 weeks old to start - it was really hard & I think I cried as much as she did! Swaddle! Or, if you can't make it work (I was terrible at it) order a miracle blanket on-line. They're kinda expensive, but totally worth it! We would also cradle her on her side, "shhhh" her & bounce her till she fell asleep & also turned on the white noise machine all night long for a few weeks. It took her about a month to work thru it completely and finally at 11 weeks she began sleeping right thru the night. Not even waking up to nurse at night, so we gave up on co-sleeping & put her in her own crib (in our room). She sleeps like a champ now! I went over to daycare to nurse her today & she was sound asleep as 2 SCREAMING babies were just waking up right next to her. She didn't move a muscle.
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#6 of 11 Old 09-12-2003, 04:14 PM
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Check out from the library or buy the book and/or video of The Happiest Baby on the Block by Dr. Harvey Karp. He puts together the 5 Ss like the posters above are describing:

Side-lying (turning baby sideways)
SHHHHing (white noise)
Sucking (on a breast or a thumb)

And it really does work!

I agree with the above posters esp. about breastfeeding. Your baby needs to nurse, even if you don't think she's getting anything, for comfort and to build up your supply!

Hang in there, it really does pass.

Come visit the NEW QuirkyBaby website -- earn QB Bucks rewards points for purchases, reviews, referrals, and more! Free US shipping on great brands of baby slings and carriers and FREE BabyLegs or babywearing mirror on orders of $100+. Take the QB Quiz for personalized advice!

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#7 of 11 Old 09-12-2003, 05:12 PM
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I just wanted to say... "Hang in there Mama!"
My ds had a period of crying inconsolably that lasted about a month (he was older than yours, about 3-4 months old) and it really wore me down. I felt so helpless and I wanted to help my little guy feel better and tried everything I could think of to no avail. He eventually stopped but I can remember how it made me feel. Try to get yourself some mental health time every once in awhile... even if it is just a walk around the block by yourself for 10 minutes. It helps. I always knew it was "temporary" but it felt like forever while it was going on.
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#8 of 11 Old 09-12-2003, 05:32 PM
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Um, this is probably colic. NAK, so soory if this is choppy.

ITA get dairy right out! There are lots of other food irritants, ie broccoli, anything acidic.

Read the colic chapter in the Baby Book. Good ideas, there. There is a great article on this website on colic, too, under crying.

Homeopathic colic remedies can help.

Honestly, for us our solution to the inconsolable crying, was

1 eliminate irritants from my diet--This was the only long-term solution that addressed the root cause of the crying.

2 walking/bath if weather didn't permit

3 natural colic remedy

4 I LOVE U tummy rub (see the colic chapter in the baby book--if you don't have it I will gladly describe.)

5 Last resort, and we pretty much had to resort to it every night for a few weeks, was mylicon drops. Helped sooo much.

Ball helped too, and lots of nursing. I cried a lot as well.

One mom I knew said the only thing that helped her ds was chiropractic.

Hope something helps! hang in there~

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#9 of 11 Old 09-12-2003, 06:27 PM
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Those evening melt-downs are the worst! It will get better, I promise!

For us, just walking/bouncing with him over one shoulder worked well. He also would stop crying in the swing or the bouncy seat, so he spent some time there too. I honestly think that even holding him was contributing to the end-of-day overstimulation, and he appreciated having some space of his own!

My babe wouldn't comfort nurse at all, so we used a pacifier and it did help at times. If he wasn't hungry and just wanted to suck, he would get mad when milk would come out. So for us the pacifier was a life-saver. Not every family will be the same, just offering my experience.

and remember that it will pass!
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#10 of 11 Old 09-12-2003, 10:40 PM
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The thing that worked for ds was putting him in his infabt carrier and rocking it on the floor. He had mild reflux and would scream after nursing unless he was upright and the carrier was the best thing
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#11 of 11 Old 09-13-2003, 11:32 AM - Thread Starter
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I can't tell you ladies how important all your wisdom was to me.

I might be getting lucky -- we had a great night last night, thanks to all your support and advice.

I made some changes in our bedtime style, and I went to bed at 8 p.m. so that I was with her when and if the episode began, but I took her first for a long sling walk and then laid her in our bed in the quiet darkness, swaddled and on her side.

She slept almost all night -- I woke her twice to nurse. I have also started waking her during the day to nurse to build up my supply, and we ditched the binky.

We'll see how this all plays out, but it seems like her crying was telling me that she wasn't groovy with her routine. Tonight will be a new experience from the last, I am sure. This baby keeps me guessing.

It's funny how we expect our old tricks to work on a new puppy.

thanks a million to all who responded -- your words were like big hugs.
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