Baby won't take a pacifier, will only suck my finger - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 14 Old 05-26-2008, 08:16 PM - Thread Starter
 
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M baby is almost 7 weeks old. She is exclusively breastfed. I have overactive letdown, and she doesn't like to comfort nurse for long because she doesn't want the milk. So early on we started letting her suck on our pinky fingers when she wanted to suck for comfort.

At 3 weeks, we introduced a pacifier, but she didn't like it. Only occasionally would she suck on it. Over the past 4 weeks, we've tried 3 brands of pacifiers. Avent, Soothie, and Nuk. She doesn't like any of them, the Avent is the one she will sometimes use. Normally I'd be happy about her pacifier refusal, as I have no specific pacifier agenda. BUT, she wants to suck on my pinky finger constantly. It's driving me nuts. She spends hours each day sucking on my finger and it's becoming more important to her as the days go by.

What can I do? When I try to nurse her and she screams, I'll then offer the paci. She screams. I know what will calm her is my finger, so that's what I do. But I don't think I can continue much longer.

Advice/ideas?

Thanks!
Pruny-fingered,
Lora
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#2 of 14 Old 05-26-2008, 08:26 PM
 
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this was my ds to a T when he was that age. He still doesn't like to comfort nurse...once he is full that's it.

i tried 6 different paci's but he only liked the MAM pacifiers. and it took some convincing. I would put my finger in his mouth then switch sometimes it worked sometimes not.

man...I remember falling asleep in weird positions so that he could suck on my finger...I feel your pain.

Keep trying, but I would definently try the MAM paci

good luck

Allyn birthmom to S 3/12/03, placed in open adoption 4/06, married to W 6/22/07, mama to H 2/5/08, mama to M 8/26/12.
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#3 of 14 Old 05-26-2008, 08:26 PM
 
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My kids HATED all the binkey's out there - with the exception of my 2nd she was a binkey a-holic. I just found these binkeys and LOVE THEM. They are 1/2 the weight of regular ones. I have found LESS and LESS nipple confusion with them, and the baby is able to keep it their mouth because it's so light compared to all the others.

Gum Drop pacifiers

http://www.gumdroppacifiers.com/
http://www.gumdroppacifier.com/index.htm (two different companies, one with an s one with out on pacifierS)


I would REALLY try these. My kids all NEEDED a binkey for the first few months- NEEDED it like they NEEDED breastmilk. Seriously. This is the ONLY binkey I will ever buy again, and it's the only one that ever worked for us.

Married to Michael and Mother of Jake 9, Jillianne 7, Jensen 5, Jacen 4. I've got severe osteoporosis, a fractured hip and chronic pain-so please be patient with me! Pagan,Crocheter,Reader,Homeschooler- that's me in a nutshell.

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#4 of 14 Old 05-26-2008, 09:18 PM
 
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We used the playtex ones with a name that is something like Most Like Mom. Not the angled ones.

We had a similar situation, but he wouldn't even take the finger. He wouldn't suck for comfort on ANYTHING. He didn't know that sucking was what he needed to comfort himself.

So, we finally tried holding it in his mouth against his will. As he would get sleepy, he would stop fighting against it. After a few days of that, he started to realize it made him feel good.

Leigh, mama to Rostislav homeborn Aug 9 2007, and Oksana homeborn Feb 24 2011.
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#5 of 14 Old 05-26-2008, 09:31 PM
 
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My DS never did take one. Which now, I REALLY appreciate because I don't have to try to take it away from him.

Three boys.  jumpers.gif
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#6 of 14 Old 05-26-2008, 10:15 PM
 
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DD wouldn't take a pacifier either (until much older -- about 5 months), but loved sucking on our pinkies. I did figure out a really comfortable way to sleep with my pinky in her mouth. I'd be on my side (which is how I usually sleep), and use a pillow to support my "upper" arm. I'd rest my fist on the bed, pinky on the sheet. Then I'd use those baby support cushions to angle the baby at just the right angle -- arm's length away from me, head pointed somewhat toward me and body pointed somewhat away -- so my pinky would be at the correct angle in her mouth. I could sleep quite comfortably once I got this position figured out, and she could suck away contentedly. I kept thinking there should be diagrams in baby care books because it was such a breakthrough for me!

It doesn't solve your daytime problem, though...
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#7 of 14 Old 05-27-2008, 12:01 AM
 
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dd2 was the same way but when the first 2 teeth appeared she stopped using my pinky.....you name the paci out there, i bought it but the gumdrop one. didn't know about that...she was about 15wk when the teeth appeared so.....she started wanting the pinky less and less....

dd1 wanted a pacifier after she weaned around 2 1/2 (just over) and used it for a month at bedtime and that was that.
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#8 of 14 Old 05-27-2008, 12:18 AM
 
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My ds was the same way. we just gave him our fingers until he grew out of needing it so much. He still sucks our thumbs and knuckles now, and still doesnt do the pacifier. he was much happier when he started being able to get his own fingers in his mouth. I went through a phase where I bought all sorts of pacifiers, I still have a bunch, and he hated them all. He would suck the longest on Nuks, and then got sick of them too and would just spit them out. Occasionally, I can get him to suck on on ein the car when he is really tired.
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#9 of 14 Old 05-27-2008, 09:49 AM
 
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DD won't take a paci either. We have tried every brand out there! The only reason I wanted her to take one is she hates the car and I thought it might keep her happy in the car if she has something to suck on. If I try to give her a paci she usually gags and screams. Other times she just keeps pushing it out with her tongue. It's so foreign to me cause ds loved the paci. We had the hardest time getting him to give it up (which he didnt do till he was 3!)

Mother of 3, welcomed a new baby girl July 2011

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#10 of 14 Old 05-27-2008, 01:18 PM - Thread Starter
 
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[QUOTE=birthmommom;11320840]
man...I remember falling asleep in weird positions so that he could suck on my finger...I feel your pain.

Hahaha this made me laugh, because I'm totally doing that too. Although I've figured out a system, sort of what's suggested below, and I don't feel too uncomfortable while doing it. Her head is always turned the same way though so then I worry about causing a flat spot. I don't want to put her on the other side because my husband sleeps there and I don't really want her between us.

I will give the MAM a try, thanks!
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#11 of 14 Old 05-27-2008, 01:20 PM - Thread Starter
 
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[QUOTE=Lady Lilya;11321188]We used the playtex ones with a name that is something like Most Like Mom. Not the angled ones.

I looked up a picture of these, and they look promising. I'll pick some up along with the MAM. The gumdrop one is the same nipple design as the Soothie, which we tried, although the face shape is different.


Thanks everyone, glad to know I'm not alone, and also that most babies only needed it for the first few months.

-Lora
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#12 of 14 Old 05-27-2008, 02:42 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RLWS View Post
M baby is almost 7 weeks old. She is exclusively breastfed. I have overactive letdown, and she doesn't like to comfort nurse for long because she doesn't want the milk. So early on we started letting her suck on our pinky fingers when she wanted to suck for comfort.

At 3 weeks, we introduced a pacifier, but she didn't like it. Only occasionally would she suck on it. Over the past 4 weeks, we've tried 3 brands of pacifiers. Avent, Soothie, and Nuk. She doesn't like any of them, the Avent is the one she will sometimes use. Normally I'd be happy about her pacifier refusal, as I have no specific pacifier agenda. BUT, she wants to suck on my pinky finger constantly. It's driving me nuts. She spends hours each day sucking on my finger and it's becoming more important to her as the days go by.

What can I do? When I try to nurse her and she screams, I'll then offer the paci. She screams. I know what will calm her is my finger, so that's what I do. But I don't think I can continue much longer.

Advice/ideas?

Thanks!
Pruny-fingered,
Lora


we did finger sucking until my dd got teeth at 5.5 months. that was when she started only nursing to sleep, able to handle my overactive letdown, and accepting other sleep-inducing methods. we did have to wean her from it though... she kept biting!

it does get annoying! especially when no one else can do it right, so she needed me or dh to do it, when we were driving, or when i was trying to clean the house! ugh. i'm so glad that is over. but with her comfort reflex-sucking and her love of the taste of skin ... it was the only option.

Lindsay + Trev = DD RóisÃ*n (9/07) & DS Ãamonn (7/2010)
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#13 of 14 Old 05-27-2008, 03:00 PM
 
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my daughter NEVER took a pacifier. NEVER. She is 22 months old and now she has started to play with one.. Go figure...

Hang in there, it will pass!!!

gigi
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#14 of 14 Old 05-27-2008, 09:43 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jokerama View Post
DD won't take a paci either. We have tried every brand out there! The only reason I wanted her to take one is she hates the car and I thought it might keep her happy in the car if she has something to suck on. If I try to give her a paci she usually gags and screams. Other times she just keeps pushing it out with her tongue. It's so foreign to me cause ds loved the paci. We had the hardest time getting him to give it up (which he didnt do till he was 3!)
That is what happened when we tried to give him other kinds of pacifiers after he got used to the playtex most like mom type.

All the ones I tried and didn't end up using, I couldn't give away because they were used (I have plenty of un-used ones that i received as gifts that I will give away) so I gave them to him as toys. You can never have enough colorful small items to put in a clear plastic tub. He can spend a lot of time taking items out and examining them. I also give him the empty boxes of small things. Small kitchen items.

Leigh, mama to Rostislav homeborn Aug 9 2007, and Oksana homeborn Feb 24 2011.
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