Who have you told so far and how long do plan to wait to make it public knowledge?
We are waiting until second trimester to tell my parents as like your husband's parents, they are likely to be less than supportive.
I told a good friend of my husband's ( a restaurant owner we hang with) and he said "you are an asshole". I smiled and said "thanks, but we are happy". He apologized and later said "I am an asshole, so don't expect anything less from me" I wouldn't and told him so! :LOL He said "I guess I should say congratulations!". Yes, you should. I don't know why people have such a negative opinion about large families. As long as we can take care of them and they are wanted, who cares?? : Whateva'!!
As for me, I only told DH. We told everyone right away last time, had a Blog where we shared every detail of our pregnancy, and let my entire family in the room during labor. My dad kept taking group shots of me with various family members. What a nightmare. This time we're keeping it as much about Us (Dh, DS, and me) as possible. We're telling our parents and then everyone else in late May. DH's parents will think we're crazy. I'm a little worried about it because they pay our mortgage for us and I'm afraid they'll freak out and cut us off or something. They won't, they're very calm Chinese people. But they only have one child and I know they'll think it's crazy to have the kids so close together.
I really like this keeping it to myself thing. I was busting at the seams to tell everyone last time. The only people I'll tell this week are my Chemistry classmates: I have to tell the lab instructor in case we do an experiment with something a baby shouldn't be exposed to.
And of course I've told all of you!
If it's a boy DH's grandfather will be extremely happy, he wants to pass on his name. So that would be nice, but I get the feeling I'm going to have another little girl!
I totally agree, though, it's nice to keep it just between you, your partner, and your children. I felt so poked and prodded the last time.
Jenn<>< crunchy conservative mama to 6
and my way through my stash.
We're waiting to tell his parents and his entire family. His parents are of the very loud and vocal opinion that we are far too young for children. (we're 27 and 26. They had DH when they were 22 and 19. In my opinion, this is more about them being too young to be grandparents than us being too young to be parents, but I'll kepe my mouth shut about that one!) They're also pretty open about the fact that they think that having my DH and his brother ruined their 'happy gypsy lifestyle' and that kids are only a bother and a burden. Needless to say, we don't agree... but I see no sense in telling them until later anyway.
Spending all of my money and time on this wild, wild life.
It's really frustrating to hear about unsupportive family. I can relate in a way. All of our family live hours away, or days away, so their support is... well... we sort of operate in our own zone. My inlaws have never been down to visit my daughter (sore point) and no one will come to help with the birth of our second... My dh and I both left home at 18 to forge our own lives and can't say we're really close to family. So.... the only person who knows I am expecting again is the man responsible, and DD, but every time I say "Mama's having a baby" she yells "Nooooooooooo". Hope she doesn't know something I don't.
I figure, I will tell them if they come for a visit, or when I have to explain why we aren't going to visit them. As far as local friends (and even far ones) I plan to wait until late May. And if they figure it out (say, I get sick every time we visit) I guess I'll be ready to tell them. I just want to keep it to myself for a while--it feels like my special secret and it gives me reason to smile that no one knows about. Maybe they think I am on happy pills, but I don't care!
My MIL has just come home from travelling for three months and we're trying to get her to come and visit next weekend so we can tell her in person. We'll let my sister-who-can-keep-a-secret and my BILs know soon, too. My non-secret-keeping-sister and the rest of the family (FIL, grandparents, aunts, uncles, etc.) will all have to wait until later.
My husband has a book launch at the end of next month, and he really wants to tell everyone at the launch- most of our friends and lots of family will probably be there. It's kind of strange, but okay with me. I'm keeping it secret at work as long as I can, because gossip spreads really quickly there.
"Guess what? It's a magical world. And when I sing, my songs are in it."
Madly in love with my 7 and 4 year old daughters
We'll see a lot of family at graduation (IN 17 DAYS!!!!) and hopefully they won't notice my belly. I'll tell you what though... these past three days that belly of mine has really been popping out. I can squeeze it back to fit into my jeans but it is UNcomfortable! That and I get short of breath from the sqeezing. I wouldn't be suprised if I'll be wearing maternity clothes by then. My brother's wife is due in May and my husband's brother's fiancee is due in Aug (?) and I can't help but feel they might think that we're competing.
Other than that, most of our friends know. Got all positive feedback. I was the only one that had a little hesitation about the spacing. But now I think it is perfect.
We have told the very close friends that we are staying with right now in Florida, it was fun to be here when we found out, as we were a big part of the pregnancy and birth of their son. I've also told one of my closest friends back in Ga, she is a birth person, and I knew she would be excited.
I am going to send my Mom and Dad a package to let them know, they live about 1000 miles away from where DH and I live, my Mom needs to know as soon as possible, because this will be the first grandchild, and I know she will want to be really involved, and we are close. I am less excited about telling my in-laws and extended family. Like you, Belleweather, my Mom and Dad-in-law feel like they are too young to be grandparents (they are 51 and 56) but I am hoping they will really jump on the band wagon once they realize that this is a done deal.
I think telling people will help make it more real for me - so I will probably tell all of the people that I would tell if I had a m/c when I get back to Ga on Tuesday. I will want support either way!
I am debating telling my boss sooner or not. I have my first MW appt next week and need to get off early. But I also dont want to start answering questions about what I plan to do after the baby is born just yet (I'm quitting), so I might keep that one to myself a little longer.
DH's family will leanr in May, since they are such busybodies. I just want to delay the amount of time I have to listen to their advice. And since we are planning a homebirth, its gonna be interesting!
Everyone else, I am going to wait til May or so, if I can. I am already overweight, so unless I have ot start wearing maternity clothes soon, I won't be obvious right away.
Originally Posted by sarahcecile
Like you, Belleweather, my Mom and Dad-in-law feel like they are too young to be grandparents (they are 51 and 56) but I am hoping they will really jump on the band wagon once they realize that this is a done deal.
I think it's great when grandparents are young cuz they can really keep up w/ the kids then, :LOL. My grandparents on my mom's side were MUCH older when I was born so as I got older, they couldn't "play" w/ me as much b/c I was too active for them.
Jenn<>< crunchy conservative mama to 6
and my way through my stash.
I am freeking about telling my mum, she will think I am mad...my MIL will be over the moon, she has 7 kids and this will be the 13th granchild.
North Idaho rural living mama to: 23 yo DD, 17 yo DS, 9 yo DS, 7 yo DS, 5 yr old DS, 3 yo DD, 2 yo DS, and our newest family member, a boy born December 2014!
THankfully, we have very supportive friends and family, so no negative vibes to worry about.