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#1 of 8 Old 10-30-2005, 04:24 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I've been a pretty avid ebayer, buying and selling, for almost 2 1/2 years (since I found out I was pg with willem). And during that time I have had a couple of minor run ins with buyers and sellers due to misunderstandings that seemed to be a direct result of the nature of the online world... communication on a screen is not always as cut and clear as talking to a person face to face. Intonations and attitude can be added by the reader according to their particular emotional state at any particular time.

This especially seems to happen when a buyer assumes that they can change the terms of the sale after they've bid/after the end of the auction. I have had that happen 3 times so far. And each time, I have quoted what I wrote in the "fine print" part of my auction listing in my email explaining why I could or wouldn't do what they were asking me to do. I am never rude, but very to the point and very precise in what I'm communicating. It's my opinion that the buyers have gotten their feathers ruffled because I didn't do what they wanted/expected me to do and ended up calling me rude etc.

So here's my question: I sold an item and the item description states that I expect payment within 48 hours or the item would be relisted and negative feedback left on the bidders' account. Basically I didn't want to be waiting on payment and go into labor and have shipment delayed etc. So I sent the invoice out the buyer as soon as the auction ended and the next day I get an email saying "I'll pay on Thursday (auction ended on sat. morning)- if that's a problem let me know." Uh... yeah, it's a problem if you just go and assume that you can change the terms of the sale after the fact without so much as an explanation why. I'm very understanding that things come up and would have worked with the buyer had they explained themselves.

So here's my reply... do you think it's rude? (it's okay to tell me that you think it is... my only intention was to be very clear, and may I add this person has 3 feedbacks on their account so I didn't think they were very experienced at the whole ebay thing).

"Yes, this actually kind of is a problem... The auction clearly states that I expect to be paid within 48 hours of the auction end. The reason (in addition to needing the $$) is that I'm about to go into labor and need to get this shipped out asap. Next time you bid on something you really need to read the whole auction and make arrangements with the seller before you bid. I will accept a credit card Paypal payment if you add $3 to cover the fees.
Thanks, Monique"

So the buyer sends me an email back saying that I didn't need to be so rude, a simple yes would have sufficed. Then they mention that they are a pediatrician with 3 kids and will allow me to be rude because they are understanding of the hormones of impending labor.... what???

SO... what do you think... where my hormones playing tricks on my brain and making me rude? Because I really didn't think I was.
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#2 of 8 Old 10-30-2005, 04:31 PM
 
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oh please.

i dont think you were rude at all, i think you were polite but firm.

Sarah- following my bliss, mama to 3 :
Dd to Ds: "Let's have a snack party! I got us chips, and a hammer!"
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#3 of 8 Old 10-30-2005, 04:36 PM
 
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Feh! No. And what a typical doctor, she'll "allow" you to be rude. She's just embarrassed and is using "you're rude" as an excuse to save face. Dude, if she's a pediatrician, she definitely isn't in the poorhouse until Thursday. Like you thought, she's just inexperienced and not too humble about it.
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#4 of 8 Old 10-30-2005, 04:44 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by flyingspaghettimama
Feh! No. And what a typical doctor, she'll "allow" you to be rude. She's just embarrassed and is using "you're rude" as an excuse to save face. Dude, if she's a pediatrician, she definitely isn't in the poorhouse until Thursday. Like you thought, she's just inexperienced and not too humble about it.
That's exactly what dh said!
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#5 of 8 Old 10-30-2005, 04:49 PM
 
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I don't think you were rude at all!
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#6 of 8 Old 10-30-2005, 05:10 PM
 
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Um, no. You were not rude at all. What a jerk your buyer was!!

Ever-evolving mama to my beautiful Brynn, and my little dimple-face Noah .
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#7 of 8 Old 10-30-2005, 05:12 PM
 
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hee hee, as another avid Ebayer I agree with the others that you were polite but firm and that the buyer was likely embarrssed about not having read the terms thoroughly. Or maybe they read them but didn't take them seriously. Who knows? I have been guilty of being eager enough to buy an item that I scanned the terms instead of reading them thoroughly. For example last Monday I bought a dress on Ebay that will be perfect for Halloween but neglected to catch the part about it shipping from India. No way am I complaining to the seller about the slow shipping--it was my fault in the first place!

As a seller on Ebay also I know what you are saying about if they had just explained why and ASKED would it be okay if I paid on Thursday then I would be more understanding and flexible. It's not as if I'd go to the grocery store, fill my basket with groceries and then say, "I'll pay on Thursday, okay?" Good luck!
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#8 of 8 Old 10-30-2005, 05:18 PM
 
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Ok.... : I do not think you were rude, but I would have been a little hurt by your reply. I am a wimp though.

Recently, I accidently did something similar. I didn't realize one of my purchases were a money order/cashiers check only. I paid a few purchases together at one time. I did not realize that the one thing was left unpaid....as she did not accept paypal. :

She was great about it......I was

Mama to 9 so far:Mother of Joey (20), Dominick (13), Abigail (11), Angelo (8), Mylee (6), Delainey (3), Colton (2) and Baby 8 and Baby 9 coming sometime in July 2013.   If evolution were true, mothers would have three arms!

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