Becca, you are so completely doing the right thing. It is SO HARD to have two like this and feel that way - especially when you know that deep down this is not how you want to feel. I do not have PPD, but I also feel the same way sometimes. It is just so stressful trying to deal with everything...
Can you call and talk to your midwife today (or a nurse if she has one) and tell her/them what you are feeling. They may be able to tell you to take some sort of supplement immediately, or? Calling your therapist is an excellent idea too.
In the meantime, is there anyway that you can get some help? Someone who could just take the heat off of you a little bit? I have had someone over almost everyday lately, and honestly, without that I think I would be a heck of a lot closer to your situation.
My doula is here right now, and these are her suggestions for things that might help immediately
1. Try to get some sleep. At least a 5 hour stretch of uninterrupted sleep can help the brain recover. Can you get a friend or someone who could help you with this.
2. Don't eat any sugar. Eat lots of whole vegetables.
3. Try to get some exercise - even a short outdoor walk.
4. Talk to someone.
5. Mother Balance is an Illinois organization dedicated to helping women with PPD. I realize that is a long way from you, but maybe you could call them to at least get some phone support or maybe they could refer you to someone nearby.http://motherbalancefoundation.org
630.605.5852 or 630.272.4636