totally thinking ahead but... *and more* - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 8 Old 06-08-2006, 02:08 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Tonight I went to a birthday party for the two-year-old son of a mama friend of mine.... and there were quite a few other moms there as well and 16 kids in all between us -- one was eight, two were five and the rest were four-and-under (including a one month old, three month old, five month old -- Lucy -- , seven month old and nine month old!)!

Anyway (yeah, the above really had nothing to do with my story).... we were discussing children in some way (can you believe it?!), then got to talking about births and/or having more children and I brought up how I do want more and that I want a homebirth next time but couldn't find midwives because while it's not illegal to birth at home, I don't think it's legal to have a midwife-attended homebirth (for the midwife, not the mom)... anyway....

a mom there says, 'oh yeah? my SIL has had homebirths for her three kids..' ... and I ask where this midwife lives .... and it's just 90 miles from here -- which means it's still in-state!!!!!! You do not even KNOW how much that just made my night (well, maybe you do you're the kind of ladies that can appreciate that kind of stuff!).... Gosh, even to just call up that lady and see if she knows of other midwives in the state... and maybe find out from her the exactly legality of it all....

AF (and the fertility that comes along with it) has not returned (whoo hoo!) so no use for calling her up yet... but gosh it's good to know that I can when needed!! I'd *almost* celebrate with dh over this news.... but... Lucy is sleeping in my arms, Katherine is here on the floor beside the computer chair sleeping ... and I might just sew instead...

(ooh... and just one fun sidenote that I'll x-post in Lactivism.... I found it wonderfully exciting that ALL SEVEN of us moms there had breastfed and/or were breastfeeding our kids!!!)

Judy, wife to my Catholic deacon husband ... homeschooling mother to my four girls and now a rainbow1284.gif BOY!!! Forever remembering our loss (8/11) angel3.gif .

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#2 of 8 Old 06-08-2006, 02:56 AM
 
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That's WONDERFUL news!!!
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#3 of 8 Old 06-08-2006, 09:49 AM
 
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: Yay!!!

And to all the bf'ing mamas!!

Bethany, mama to M (9), J (7), S (4), and baby BOY 9/13/10!!
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#4 of 8 Old 06-08-2006, 03:15 PM - Thread Starter
 
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and here's more!

I was telling dh this story at lunch (about the midwife thing) and (this is where things get good ) .... .... he was .... EXCITED about that! I mean really... or at least as excited as he gets over stuff like that..... and then he mentioned something about talking with a guy at work about it... or, how did it come up... I'm not sure, but I thought it was funny he'd even talk about it with any guys he works with (he works at a correctional facility for troubled boys ... and he certainly wasn't anywhere near where he is now even at the beginning of my pregnancy with Lucy!).

I was totally stoked though! Gosh, I remember the first time I had even *mentioned* that people have homebirths (um, not even that I wanted one), he got this weird almost grossed-out look on his face... and now? gosh, he talks with co-workers about it and gets excited when I mention it ... I him

Judy, wife to my Catholic deacon husband ... homeschooling mother to my four girls and now a rainbow1284.gif BOY!!! Forever remembering our loss (8/11) angel3.gif .

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#5 of 8 Old 06-08-2006, 06:34 PM
 
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Judy, I totally understand how you're feeling. I remember deciding to go HB after DD, and DH's first reaction wasn't exactly all I'd hoped, although he was open to it. By the time I did all my research and presented him with the facts about it, he was as excited as I was. Now, he loves to tell people about my HB with Will - all the benefits of HBing, how misunderstood HBing is, etc...

I'm so glad you found a MW who might be the first piece to your puzzle of figuring out your HB. What an exciting adventure you're about to embark on!

Oh, and HBing with MWs is illegal where I live, too. :
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#6 of 8 Old 06-09-2006, 12:56 AM
 
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Oh, Judy! That's SO exciting!!!

My DH wasn't really on board when I was pregnant with out oldest and I said I wanted a HB. He went along grudgingly to interview the MW I liked the best. She looked at him and said, "Listen, it's a smart man who listens to his wife about where she wants to give birth." He did. All our kids were born at home. ANd, he's one of the biggest homebirth supporters I know!

May your husband listen to his wife when she tells him where she wants to birth,. .

Spark and her four firecrackers.
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#7 of 8 Old 06-09-2006, 02:43 AM
 
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very cool judy

my dh now thinks that anyone who doesnt bf all the time, sleep with baby when they want and homebirth is completely nuts!

its nice when they are supportive
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#8 of 8 Old 06-09-2006, 02:56 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by oliversmum2000
my dh now thinks that anyone who doesnt bf all the time, sleep with baby when they want and homebirth is completely nuts!

its nice when they are supportive
dh has 'come around' on So Many Things!!!! The first time I even barely mentioned NIP he said I was NEVER going to do that.... I simply rolled my eyes, gave him the 'yeah right' nod and went on with my business. When I told him that for this most recent birth I didn't want any pain medication he game *me* the 'yeah right' look, rolled his eyes and went on.... ... when I talked about the importance of bfing (the older two were not bf'd) and how I was completely determined this time, he basically said it was good I was going to try and give it my best effort, but maybe should have some formula on hand (because he saw the trials and the rough time when I 'tried' bf the first two for a couple days) .. you know, just to 'help me'.. .... I told him No Way! .... ooh, I can go back even farther to when I was pregnant with Katherine and I told him I wanted to use cloth diapers. He looked at me like I had suddenly sprouted another head. I gave him the, 'yes, I am serious about this,' look... he looked puzzled but said, "we'll see how long this lasts"... (um, two+ years later we're still at it! and now I'm making my own ) ...

so maybe I just finally wore him down .... when I bring up homebirthing and a midwife, he smiles, nods and ends up talking about it with guys at work

I think I picked a good one

Judy, wife to my Catholic deacon husband ... homeschooling mother to my four girls and now a rainbow1284.gif BOY!!! Forever remembering our loss (8/11) angel3.gif .

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