I recently found out through amnio that our baby carries a chromosomal abnormality, and I have to tell you, knowing has been the best decision for us. Yes, we were stressed out when we first learned the news. Devastated, in fact. But we've come to terms with our diagnosis and are prepared to greet our son with joyful hearts and happiness. I would much prefer to know about his problems and deal with the news now, before his birth, than to be faced with the news after he's here.
|Keep in mind you were blessed with this child for a reason, regardless of why. YOU HAVE BEEN BLESSED!
Tummy, I think every mother feels blessed by her child. But as the prospective mother of a special needs child, I have to tell you that I get a little annoyed by everyone reminding me of how "blessed" we are that our son has problems. NOBODY wants their child to have problems. EVERYONE wants a healthy baby. And to imply that a woman who might grieve because her child isn't healthy isn't appreciating her "blessing"....well, I kind of resent that.
|If you have been blessed with a child whom has special needs it is not a curse, but a true blessing!
It's not a matter of feeling cursed. It's a matter of grieving for the child you thought you were going to have....for the life you thought you were going to live. Every mother who is faced with the news that her child is "different" is entitled to that grief. No, I don't think I have been "cursed" because my child will have special needs, but I will tell you that I wish with all my heart that he could be a "normal" child. I wish I could spare him the struggles he is sure to face because of his disabilities.
dogmama, only you can make the decision about amnio. It was a very scary procedure for me, as I was terrified of miscarriage. But I am so glad we went through with it, and I'm glad I'm armed with the knowledge about my son's possible disabilities. I'm glad I have the chance to prepare for him. And FWIW, my anxiety about the amnio was 1,000 times worse than the actual procedure.
Good luck to you.