Do you have a house cleaner? - Page 4 - Mothering Forums

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#91 of 107 Old 07-02-2010, 08:56 PM
 
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i have someone every other week, to do all the big stuff... wash the floors, scrub the kitchen and bathroom fixtures well, etc. i can keep my house straightened, and the kitchen is always clean, laundry no problem but would not be able to keep it really clean, the way it should be, with two 17-month-olds unless that was all i did and just did the necessary things w/my kids. i think it's really important to take them out to do nice things (playground, hang with friends, explore in the backyard, library, whatever). i wouldn't be able to do that if i had to scrub the tub and wash the windows. well worth the expense.

when my housekeeper is here i'm not hanging out and watching tv. i'm going grocery shopping, organizing one of the 100000 things that needs organizing, cooking, reading to the kids, etc.... i grew up in a nice clean house and i want the same for my kids. i could not do it myself.
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#92 of 107 Old 07-02-2010, 09:22 PM
 
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Originally Posted by momasana View Post
Lately it seems like I'm one of the only SAHM's I know who doesn't have a house cleaner. Even families who I know are living on a tight budget have paid help come in at least twice a month to clean house.

It's not something I can fit in my budget. I admit that it would be nice, but even if I had the extra money there are a bunch of other ways I'd prefer to spend it.

Mostly I'm just curious to know if this is common for SAHM's everywhere or if it is just a trend here in my area.
Although I certainly need the help, we do not have someone else come in to clean our house. We have not had the money for the longest time and now that we have some wiggle room in our finances.... I admit that I feel odd about asking another woman to clean my toilets, scrub my floors, etc.
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#93 of 107 Old 07-02-2010, 09:24 PM
 
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Originally Posted by dividedsky View Post
when my housekeeper is here i'm not hanging out and watching tv. i'm going grocery shopping, organizing one of the 100000 things that needs organizing, cooking, reading to the kids, etc.... i grew up in a nice clean house and i want the same for my kids. i could not do it myself.
We have someone who comes weekly and I'm usually cleaning out the fridge, decluttering, washing clothes, etc. before they come. Then I really get my money's worth and our home is sparkling.

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#94 of 107 Old 07-06-2010, 11:00 PM
 
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I swear I'm not being snarky, but how do you not stress, give up some sleep, or lower your standards and do EVERYTHING when you have four kids? I am baking our fourth, and the oldest is six years old. So while they do help with unloading the dishwasher and picking up toys, they really aren't capable of doing "bigger" cleaning/cooking/household chores.

I am a pretty hard worker, but I'm still human, and I maybe *could* do it all if I sacrificed somewhere else--family time when dh comes home, sleep, or sanity--but I certainly don't want to live that way. Up until the last fifty or so years, at least in the United States, it was quite common for SAHM's to have even daily help cleaning or cooking or caretaking, and we also had, in some cases, tighter SAHM "networks" to help each other out. I don't mean that these mothers had it "easy," but they weren't expected to do everything alone, either.

Really I'm not trying to argue or be preachy. I just genuinely would love to be able to do it all, and I'm not sure how I could.
I could not. I had four under four. I loved them, played with them, fed them, cared for them and did what other things I could. My house was a wreck but never filthy. My clothes were clean but wrinkled or stained at times. I was tired all the time. I did not sleep well or much. I tried to stay kind, engaged, involved, and playful while feeding, changing diapers, etc.

The house did not matter. I do not regret not keeping a cleaner house.
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#95 of 107 Old 07-08-2010, 12:01 PM
 
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I have a cleanish home, good dinners every night, 4 good kids, and I don't neglect my kids or marriage too much. I don't think this makes me amazing or perfect. Maybe I have lower standards because my baseboards aren't spotless, but I think some people can stay on top of the house, generally, without help.

Of course if I could afford a cleaner I wouldn't pass one up!
Here's the thing: I DO think this makes you amazing. Routines and discipline really help, but you accomplish a lot more than some women can. I swear, some people are just gifted and others were raised in such a way that the habits and skills to be a good homemaker become second nature. For those of us who didn't...accomplishing what you do seems miraculous
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#96 of 107 Old 07-08-2010, 02:51 PM
 
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I totally want a cleaner. But I'm shocked by how many SAHMs have one! How do you all afford that? It would be the equivalent of another car payment for bare bones one from what I've seen. Is it really worth that much money? I guess we are barely middle class (finally after barely making rent for years and years) and just can not imagine having enough money for a cleaner.

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#97 of 107 Old 07-08-2010, 08:53 PM
 
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I totally want a cleaner. But I'm shocked by how many SAHMs have one! How do you all afford that? It would be the equivalent of another car payment for bare bones one from what I've seen. Is it really worth that much money? I guess we are barely middle class (finally after barely making rent for years and years) and just can not imagine having enough money for a cleaner.
I found my gal on Craigslist. She's a SAHM, too, just looking for a bit of extra income. I pay her $50 for 2.5 hours (she charges $25/hr, now, but started me at $20, and I needed that extra half hour so she went agreed to it...) every two weeks. It's not *necessary*, but MAN, it is SO nice. I like a CLEAN, organized house. I homeschool & do all of that other typical SAHM stuff. Having someone deep clean the bathrooms, dust, clean the windows and glass, clean the microwave, vacuum the stairs, change the sheets... it makes me such a happier, more relaxed mama.

$100 a month is totally worth it and swingable, especially since I cut the big cable package down to local only...
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#98 of 107 Old 07-09-2010, 11:29 PM
 
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Not unless you count DH! He does a lot to keep up with the day to day clutter, and I do the actual cleaning (mopping, bathrooms, etc.) I think it works because all the cleaning doesn't fall on me, otherwise I would feel overwhelmed. He is more concerned about mess than I am, and I care more about things being actually clean (like the toilets being scrubbed, and floor mopped). I probably have lower standards than many, but our house almost always looks presentable.

My kids are involved too -- no, they're not really helping, but swishing around the toilet brush sure keeps my 2 yo busy. And my 5 yo is obsessed with mopping. My best time to clean the bathroom is when the kids are taking a bath, I get it all shiny and wipe out the tub as soon as they get out. I am always trying to work on my organizational skills to get the house clean without a lot of stress.

I would say that none of my SAHM friends have house cleaners (we frequently talk about strategies for getting hosework done with young kids around) but this probably has more to do with the fact that we're all living on tight budgets than on any particular conviction.

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#99 of 107 Old 07-13-2010, 01:26 AM
 
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Originally Posted by azgirl View Post
Here's the thing: I DO think this makes you amazing. Routines and discipline really help, but you accomplish a lot more than some women can. I swear, some people are just gifted and others were raised in such a way that the habits and skills to be a good homemaker become second nature. For those of us who didn't...accomplishing what you do seems miraculous


this is how i feel. my mom kept a very clean house when i was little, but we moved when i was 13, then she and my dad got divorced, and she just really didn't care anymore. i got used to navigating the house through the stacks of laundry baskets and boxes of books and so on, and it seemed fairly normal to me.

so now, i keep trying to get myself on task and keep up with stuff, but, man, i'm so tired all the time (hubby works third and i hardly sleep when he's gone), just keeping up with the kids is hard sometimes, let alone the house!

i wish i had the money for a cleaning lady. that day would be like heaven to me.

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#100 of 107 Old 07-13-2010, 11:25 AM
 
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No, but I would like it. Maybe someone every other week to do the deep down stuff and I could just maintain in between. But, we can't afford it, and really that's ok. What I need is a good routine. And to stick with it!
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#101 of 107 Old 07-13-2010, 12:04 PM
 
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We don't, but we might someday, and I don't begrudge anyone who does. The big, deep cleaning projects have been totally neglected since DS came along eight months ago. Thankfully dh and I have a very similar level of tolerance for filth.

DH helps a lot, but he works all week and misses his babe, so I hate setting aside the weekends for cleaning projects.
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#102 of 107 Old 07-13-2010, 11:06 PM
 
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We do, once every two weeks. I'm a first-time mom, and after having had an emergency c-section, there's no way I could have handled the stairs and the cleaning in the first few weeks. It's totally worth the expense so I can let some of the little things go and concentrate on my new role.

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#103 of 107 Old 07-14-2010, 04:15 PM
 
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I grew up in a very messy house -- there were three kids, my mom struggled with depression and my dad became an alcoholic, and she just didn't do the things most moms do to keep the place clean -- she felt it was oppressive to women to clean and she didn't believe in maids. So I didn't develop the habits of house cleaning and also am used to clutter, so it's hard for me even to think of how others keep their homes looking so beautiful. I'm a lousy housekeeper and it often makes me think I should be WOHming so I could justify the expense of a housecleaner. Beyond just clean, though, I have no spacial sense and can't create a nice looking home, cluttered or not. How does one learn such things anyway?

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#104 of 107 Old 07-16-2010, 11:41 AM
 
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Pookietooth -I look at magazines for organization ideas.

When my children were small I had a housecleaner. By the time I had second baby crawling on the floor I had been in 3 car accidents and my back just could not take the work. Now I have a big strong teen who mows the lawn and mops the floor. I also bought a Roomba a couple years ago. Our floors are mostly hardwood and linoleum. It works great on them I used the real vac with HEPA filter on the carpet in our bedroom. I try and run the Roomba in the kitchen every night. It really seems to cut down on the dust that migrates to the other rooms.

My bathrooms are not very clean. I keep the half bath near the door clean. That is the one that friends and family use. I don't let the baby play in the bathroom. He doesn't like the bath. He gets a wash down in the sink.
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#105 of 107 Old 07-17-2010, 11:15 PM
 
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I'm coming to this thread late but wanted to mention what I did.
We are on a tight budget like so many of others but I hated spending my very little free time on deep cleaning.

I figured out what were the hardest things to keep clean/biggest stressors and for me that was the bathrooms and the kitchen.

I had the realization that a cleaner does not need to come and clean the *entire* house. If I could get someone to only clean the above I would be happy.

So I placed an ad in Craigslist looking for someone for 2 hours every other week. *I also posted how much I was willing to pay* - this is key. I knew I couldn't afford more than a certain amount. It was much less than the typical going rate but I thought someone out there would appreciate the money regardless.

I got several replies and now have a housecleaner come 2 x week for 2 hours. I do pick up tons before she comes but she does the cleaning work. She is very efficient and actually does a few extra things if she gets done.

It has made a huge difference to my stress level and mental wellness.
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#106 of 107 Old 07-21-2010, 09:51 PM
 
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We do. I'm 27 weeks pregnant and utterly fatigued and DS is a very high needs 21-month-old who is incredibly sweet and easygoing but very, very active and energetic. DH is gone most of the time and his current project will have him out of town for the entire month of August. We just moved across the country and have no friends or family in our new town, so we hired a mother's helper/housekeeper to come to the house for a few hours every day so I can get some rest and decompress a little bit. Her main duty is playing with DS but when he naps, she cleans. She's been a total blessing and I feel incredibly lucky that we found her. Most housekeepers won't do childcare, and most childcare workers won't do housework. To find someone happy and willing to do both was huge and I can't recommend it highly enough.

I don't know if most women of the past had housekeepers and paid help, but I do know that intergenerational households were much more common back in the day. SAHMs had mothers, grandmothers, sisters, aunties, cousins, and others who lived with or near them and could pitch in on childcare duties and chores. I don't think human beings were designed to try to do it all with no help. Not that I think it's not possible--I mean, I did it for quite awhile...but there's no shame in getting help if you can. Self-care is so important and I think we women sometimes sell ourselves short in that regard. At least, I know I have in the past. It's taken me a lot of hard experiences to finally admit that I have needs, too.

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#107 of 107 Old 07-27-2010, 01:23 AM
 
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We have a house cleaner who comes once a month and LOVE her! She is super thorough and takes her 6 hours to clean hour house top to bottom and does an amazing job. Obviously I clean around the house all the time, but she does a ton of deep cleansing that I don't get around to do, such as 1)de-webbing (OMG we have like 100 spiders in the house plus high ceilings), 2)move all the furnitures & rugs to clean the floor underneath (really she moves all the futons, sofas, tables, etc.), 3)ovens/stoves/fridge shelves, 4)blinds/glass doors/windows, etc, etc. If she didn't do them, they will never get done in like 10 years, so definitely worth it!

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