Perfect analogy of SAHM - Mothering Forums

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Old 10-14-2010, 12:19 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I was thinking about the thread....whether you prefer to be called a SAHM or homemaker.

I think I may have thought of the best job description for my life as a stay at home mom.

A hamster on a wheel. Not ever allowed to get off, rest, nothing....just keep running and running and running.

I do stuff all day. Clean up.....lasts 2-5 minutes before there is another mess, I break up fights between siblings, cook, clean, read, bath, scrub, I am just a hamster running on a wheel. No one notices or cares that I might need a rest or even deserve a rest. I get no sick days, no vacation time, no girls night.....I just have to keep running on that wheel. I do a tonne of stuff, but never ever look around feeling like I have accomplished anything....because if I clean up it only lasts until I turn around again.

I am just a hamster on a wheel. I just wish I could get off and have a little break.
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Old 10-14-2010, 03:32 PM
 
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I feel ya.

---feeling like an emu on acid---
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Old 10-14-2010, 03:37 PM
 
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I feel completely the same way. I prefer to be called a SAHM. I try to explain to my husband that my job is in place of a daycare provider or a babysitter and that when he gets off HIS job, then I get off as well and we do evening parenting and housecare TOGETHER. So far he doesn't 'get' it because 'well you are HOME all day so why CAN'T you keep the house clean and get dinner started?'

He even refers to leave time as HIS vacation... and doesn't understand that I shouldn't have to do the exact same thing I do when he isn't on leave... but with him napping during it.
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Old 10-14-2010, 04:03 PM
 
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Wow, that sure does describe it.
I still say though, I cant stand the title stay at home mom!
It sounds so lazy.
This is the only job I've ever had where I dont get a lunch break, or ANY break. If I do get one, it's because I force myself to and then who pays for it later?

Here is the classified add for my SAHM position:

Full time, double shift child care and wetnurse with midnight and early am hours.
Must also do all housework and cooking. No break unless willing to work the next few hours until extreme physical exhaustion.
Happily direct DH to his meal so he can sitdown and eat it while you wear baby and start laundry every evening at 9pm.
Possibility of a tv show and chocolate at 11pm. 5 hour maximum for sleep priveleges.

It's fun to complain, but I have to say this is the best time of my life.
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Old 10-14-2010, 04:28 PM
 
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mom2happy, can I steal that for a FB status?

I'm a hamster on a wheel, too. It's not fair sometimes, but what can I do? Getting a job is not an option and not what I want to do. Though people might actually appreciate me then or treat me with respect instead of assuming I'm a lazy freeloader since I don't bring in a paycheck.

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Old 10-14-2010, 04:49 PM
 
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Me too. It's still shocking to me how burnt out I am from life as a SAHM, compared with life ever before. *sigh*

Oh, and vacations: At least Dh is willing to help out with the kids equally on vacations, but he likes the "go somewhere else and just sit" kind of vacation... which I hate because it's basically my normal daily life (not a lot of sitting - more chasing kids, etc), but in another location. *I* want to go DO something DIFFERENT than normal... like go to museums, window shop, go out to eat, find cool parks, etc...

Jenna ~ mommy to Sophia Elise idea.gif  (1/06), Oliver Matthew  blahblah.gif (7/07) and Avery Michael fly-by-nursing1.gif(3/10)

 

dizzy.gif Wading slowly and nervously into this homeschooling thing.

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Old 10-15-2010, 03:42 AM
 
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Yes!! though i have to say that i do feel it's important for me to be here, and also that i don't feel like that every day. like when the kids happily pull out their workbooks and ask me to help them, meanwhile the baby is content to sit on my lap. or the mornings that i get to snuggle with my baby and little girl. or when we go out somewhere fun, like the park, on a beautifully ideal day and we just have a blast. there certainly are perks, but a hamster on a wheel succinctly describes how i feel on the icky days. thanks for putting words to it!
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Old 10-15-2010, 01:54 PM
 
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Yes, this is definately how I feel! That's part of why my heart just isn't in cooking and cleaning-I have to do it over and over and over again. Sure my living room looks great, but give it a half hour and it'll look like I never clean. Why bother?!? Of course, if I never clean it will get nasty and unlivable. Hamster wheel. I think part of why I like laundry so much is because things get clean with limited interaction from me. And I get to sit while I fold. It is important for me to be here for my kiddos while they are young. But I constantly have this little cloud hanging over me telling me to go clean. Bah!

 read.gif Rachael~~SAHM to fairy.gif (4/27/06), diaper.gif (11/18/09) and babyf.gif (1/29/11); married to a fabulous man! flowersforyou.gif  intactlact.gif cd.gif    caffix.gif )O(

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Old 10-18-2010, 10:57 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 3xMama View Post
It is important for me to be here for my kiddos while they are young. But I constantly have this little cloud hanging over me telling me to go clean. Bah!



I have that cloud at my house too!

fly-by-nursing1.gifSAHM living on the beautiful Eastern Shore with my husband the car nut banghead.gif, and bebe Eleanor, born 9/16/09 luxlove.gif plus two kitties! cat.gif
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Old 10-19-2010, 02:31 AM
 
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Hugs. I have found a rythm mostly, but there are still periods where I wonder if my life will ever make sense again.
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