How to change thinking that I have to be earning money to be of worth - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 4 Old 12-18-2011, 08:27 AM - Thread Starter
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I don't earn any money as a sahm of course. Before I had kids, I worked a ton, made good money working long hours and felt great about myself. Now that I don't make a penny, I feel like I never acomplish anything at the end of the day even though I am super busy taking care of the house and kids. And I never work on hobbies since I feel like I am wasting my time if they can't make me money. Like why would I make herbal salves in bulk- what just to give them away? Or knit, I think, can I make money off this some how? Now that I have been working on my psychic skills, and doing readings for free, I think that I have wasted my time all day since I didn't make any money. But then I want to help others out and do things for free. Still I feel like if I am not making money, I am not going to of worth and appreciated.
Is it normal to feel like this?
Perhaps I feel like this because we are broke?
For those who are well off financially, do you ever get these feelings?
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#2 of 4 Old 12-19-2011, 09:56 PM
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I have an 8 month old and am a SAHM at the moment. hated my last job and I was so glad to get out of there but in general I know what you mean. I have always worked since I was 14. I was a single mom with my first son until he was 6 (he's 12 now). I have always had my own money. It's hard to get used to not working. We are on 1 income and seriously budgeted but my husband tells me all the time how much he appreciates that I am taking care of our baby and the house. Do you feel like you're not appreciated by your partner? By society?

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#3 of 4 Old 12-20-2011, 05:47 AM
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We live in corrupted paradigm. My husband is the first to point out if we were getting paid for the work we do and the hours it takes to do it, we would be making over a hundred thousand a year! Most other cultures realize everything turns to *&^% if you don't invest in nurturing the young. I have spent the last few years happily weeding out allot of BS I "believe" in. The water, soil and air  also have no monetary value in the accepted economic view, either. How can we change our thinking? By taking out the subconscious trash we have been fed.

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#4 of 4 Old 12-20-2011, 06:09 AM
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I don't see it much with my parents or parents-in-law, but extended family sometimes makes comments. At a gathering this fall a distant relation asked if I was "still just staying home."  Well yes, I suppose I am. And eating bon-bons, too. 


With the shift of culture to two-earner families, it's just expected that mothers work. The price of goods kind of assumes two earner, also. It seems like the more money families make, the less that money actually buys.  I say to myself that the only solution is to buy less. Unfortunately, that mindset only seems to work when we don't "need" something.

Twin boys (2/05) and little sister (10/07)
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