How often do you get out of the house?? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 2 Old 03-11-2013, 10:30 PM - Thread Starter
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I'm naturally a very active person. I like my down time but prefer to be busy during the day. We have a 4 year old and a 22 month old. For awhile there there would rarely be two days in a row that we would be at home. I'd always friend a reason to leave the house. The problem is that we are at least a 20 minute drive from anything besides parks or a Walgreens. So I'd think, hm... I want to make cookies, and have no chocolate chips, and I only buy organic, so Id load the kids up and head to the nearest Kroger(20 minutes away) and buy 1 or two items, usually more, and then oh hey, let's get some Starbucks while we're here. Our trip to the grocery store that would have cost only 5.00 ends up in a thirty dollar trip and fuel round trip and time away from home. This happened all the time. We had the money to blow and I took advantage of the "reasons to leave the house." Now DH had a different job, lower pay and I'm having to get used to staying at home more, planning my grocery trips and not going out just to go out. Here are the perks though, we are eating healthier, and the kids are more well behaved since I'm spending more time with them. I'm not so focused on getting the chores done so we can leave, like I was before. but I feel more disconnected from the outside world. I love my kids, currently homeschooling and will continue to for as long as possible, and we have lots of fun, but I always feel this tug to get out of the house to go do something. Any homeschoolers out there? When will I expect it to become more of a necessary priority to have the kids involved with activities and socialization? They do play with friends maybe once, twice a week and see their cousins at least once a week, but most of the time is spent with me and daddy. Does that sound about right for this age?

DH(9/04) DS(12/08) and DD(5/11)

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#2 of 2 Old 03-11-2013, 11:20 PM
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I too have been transitioning from a pretty active out-and-about style of parenting/life to a more home-bodied one.  Six months ago we moved to a completely different state, where we know no one and are now a one income family.  So, no more trips to the co-op and then out for coffee for me either!


I started looking at the Waldorf philosophy and homeschooling 'techniques'.  They really emphasize a strong rhythm to one's day, and although I thought I would never be a person with a strong rhythm to my day, I had to start somewhere!  It isn't set in stone, but we kind of have a flow to things that we didn't have before.  I think I was more apt to get bored than my 3yo DS, and say "C'mon, let's go ___!"  But I am finding myself actually wanting to stay home (or close to home) more and just BE. 


The Waldorf philosophy also talks about the first cycle of people's life (approx the first 7 years) as a sort of dream time, where the child is not fully into themselves yet and is still completely open to the world.  This is a time of imitation (as I am sure you have figured out!).  I think that it is totally fine that your kids are home with you and daddy, what better role models could they have?


I was feeling stir crazy at first being home all of the time, and kind of feeling like I wasn't doing enough or it wasn't showing when I tallied up 'what-was-done' at the end of the day.  When we started trying to have a rhythm/flow to our days I started taking it a lot easier.  I stopped counting tasks or accomplishments.  For instance, before at the beginning of a day I might have said to myself:  I need to do laundry, the bathroom needs cleaning -especially the tub, I gotta remember to soak beans and make tortillas, and I should totally vacuum since I am going to be in cleaning mode...  I didn't necessarily believe I would get everything done that day, but I still had it in my head as Needs To Happen!  Now, I prioritize:  Today we will do laundry.  The end.  We start laundry, we do some other stuff, maybe play, maybe clean the bathroom... we just see where the day leads us, but laundry is the only thing on my list.  At the end of the day when the laundry is done, I feel good about our day!  And usually because I am so much mellower about the day DS helps and we both have a great day and do MORE than what I "plan" (like, "hey, while the clothes are washing let's make lunch and have a backyard picnic!")


I hope this makes some sort of sense... it is kind of a rant.

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