I Want A Night Off! - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 28 Old 05-23-2013, 05:33 PM - Thread Starter
 
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For one night I don't want to cook or even serve dinner! I don't want to clean up the kitchen or load the dishwasher.  I don't want to bathe the children, dress them, or brush their teeth.  I don't want to read stories or fight to get anyone in bed.  I don't want to get you a glass of water or take you potty.  I don't want to have to keep turning around and coming back to kiss you because you didn't kiss me.  

 

I want to come home tired after a long day and sit in front of the TV.  Grab myself something like to eat (no cooking) and eat it on the couch.  Maybe move to my bed and watch more TV.  Maybe take a hot shower or bath.  Put on comfortable cloths and go to sleep when I'm ready.  Ooh maybe watch a movie!

 

I LOVE my children but gosh would I LOVE just one night off! You can see I wouldn't even know what to do with myself?! For almost 9 years I've nursed, cooked, fed,changed, bathed, dressed, brushed, read, kissed, soothed, etc, etc. I've never had a night off, EVER.  I wonder what it's like????


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#2 of 28 Old 05-23-2013, 05:41 PM
 
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hug.gif Let's split a hotel room! I'll give you full reign on the remote wink1.gif I'm only 2 years in, expecting baby #2 so I imagine your need to unwind is about 5 times as intense as mine. All I got for you is hugs!

ETA: I would add "use the toilet in privacy" to your list wink1.gif
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#3 of 28 Old 05-23-2013, 08:31 PM
 
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I'll split it with you guys three ways.  I'm almost 18 years in... could we keep the tv volume on low...?


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#4 of 28 Old 05-24-2013, 12:13 PM
 
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My stbx thought he have me time off all the time.

But no making dinner and doing dishes while the kids regular come in to me for things they think only I can do or hang crying from me is not time off!

Yes dinner made would be lovely too!
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#5 of 28 Old 05-26-2013, 07:50 AM - Thread Starter
 
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All right I'm in on the hotel.  Years back I really wanted to stay at a casino.  I never had anyone to go with me or the money.greensad.gif

 

I was telling the kids last night when I was putting them in bed Mommy was going to a hotel ALONE.  They were all screaming and crying. "I can't sleep without a Mommy kiss!!" "You can't I'll die!" "I'm going too! I'll sneak in the car with you!" SIGH!!

 

I don't know if I could really do it? I would miss their sweet little faces and worry about them all night.  The idea/dream of it seems so wonderful, but the reality...?

 

Baby 4 is due in Sept.  I may have one or two more...so I should get a night off in um 15-20 years from now???? Then again my middle is already telling me she is going to live next door to me so I can help her with her babies everyday so she won't be so stressed out. (lol she's 5)

 

SIGH


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#6 of 28 Old 05-30-2013, 09:14 PM
 
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#7 of 28 Old 05-30-2013, 10:04 PM
 
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Ladies, I am going to charter a plane. Go ahead and sneak out of your bedroom window at 10:30pm. I'll meet you outside your place. We are flying to Fiji...

Or maybe we could just go to the Subway down the street so we can poop without someone coming in to beg to sit on our lap?????
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#8 of 28 Old 05-30-2013, 10:16 PM
 
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i did that when DD1 was about 7 and DS about 5 & got DH to drive me to the next town over and stayed alone in a hotel room for 2 nights and 2 full days ... just to be able to do what i wanted (= not much, reading & following my own time table for eating and sleeping) when i wanted ... it was BLISS, best birthday present to myself ever ....

When DD2 was 3 (and the older kids 12 and 10) i went away alone for 9 days spending the time with a relative (whose own children are grown up, so everybody would eat whenever they felt like it all 3 adults having some sort of food intolerance or allergies and taking care of their own eating in the same kitchen so still in a friendly atmosphere, it was brilliant !!!!)  not sure when i can next fit another of these "holidays" ....

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#9 of 28 Old 05-30-2013, 10:21 PM
 
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Rent a hotel room for a night, with room service and in room massage and have a night to yourself. Why wonder about it?

 

I would go insane if I had no break for 9 years.

 

I had evening out once a week as soon as baby was not nursing every 3 hours and a week alone vacation every year. It energized me to care for my family in better ways.

 

Breaks are important.

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#10 of 28 Old 06-23-2013, 02:00 PM
 
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That sounds lovely, although I would like to add that I would like to come home and not find a huge pile of dishes, huge piles of laundry, and the house in shambles.  My DH and I try to take off at least 1 day a year (in a hotel in town) just for a break.  Although to be honest, i would really like 2 days & nights all to myself.

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#11 of 28 Old 06-23-2013, 03:17 PM
 
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My sister and I have a dream of a weekend away at a spa. In a year or so I hope to make it happen but we shall see. Before kids I had no idea how busy things could get!
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#12 of 28 Old 06-23-2013, 07:10 PM
 
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Call me crazy, but my fantasy these days is a week, alone, in my house.  I feel like I could solve allllllllll our family's problems with a week alone in the house. 
 

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#13 of 28 Old 06-23-2013, 08:04 PM
 
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I'm with newmamalizzy. Home alone in the house?! It would be so great. I tell my self I would clean and organize, but really I would lay in bed and read. And it would be awesome.
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#14 of 28 Old 06-25-2013, 07:08 PM
 
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Either an empty house or a hotel room sounds soooo deliciously wonderful. Room service or take out, a whole bed to myself, hours to read or sleep or watch a movie (I don't think I've made it through a whole one since DS was born...) Sigh. Sometimes I use creative visualization to take myself to the spa. I imagine and try to feel each treatment I would get, the meal I'd order afterwards, and the marathon nap I'd take at the end. Is that too pathetic??

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#15 of 28 Old 06-25-2013, 07:25 PM
 
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I so needed this thread tonight. smile.gif  Ahhhh...just the thought of it....

Quote:
Originally Posted by gitanamama View Post

Either an empty house or a hotel room sounds soooo deliciously wonderful. Room service or take out, a whole bed to myself, hours to read or sleep or watch a movie (I don't think I've made it through a whole one since DS was born...) Sigh. Sometimes I use creative visualization to take myself to the spa. I imagine and try to feel each treatment I would get, the meal I'd order afterwards, and the marathon nap I'd take at the end. Is that too pathetic??

 

No way!  It's essential to my sanity - only I imagine myself, alone, in some tiny loft in an old building - filled with bookshelves.  Having a cup of coffee.  In the quiet.  Sun streaming in through the windows.  And reading - lots of reading, writing, or maybe even painting!  love.gif  Solitude.


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#16 of 28 Old 06-27-2013, 01:03 PM
 
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Such a lovely, funny, sad (because many of us can only fantasise for now) and sweet thread. :-D One day ... perhaps in about 3 years ... Hotel Room for one here I come. I never would have even thought about how wonderful the solitude would be until I read this thread. Amazing idea! :-D
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#17 of 28 Old 06-27-2013, 01:36 PM
 
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Susanmary, I think that'll be my wish for mother's day 2015 or 2016, depending on how our new arrival sleeps. One blissful night away... Sleep and room service wink1.gif
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#18 of 28 Old 06-27-2013, 02:55 PM
 
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Ahhhh! Love the idea of this! I am also in the group who wants a week home alone. Sometimes I think about that and how much work AND relaxing I could do!

With a 7 mo, I've still got a little while to wait but when DS2 is about 2, DH and I are going on our only second trip away from kids. Maybe I can squeeze in a trip by myself too.

Anyone else sometimes look forward to the kids growing up? I've never been a person to mourn my kids growing, I love to see them learn and change and get older. My sister is so sad when her kids celebrate another birthday. I just think "yep, DS1 will be three this year and it's been three long and amazing years. Glad we're here finally."

I love my boys more than anything but also long for ME again. Time off would be nice!

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#19 of 28 Old 06-27-2013, 03:10 PM
 
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Originally Posted by sere234 View Post

Ahhhh! Love the idea of this! I am also in the group who wants a week home alone. Sometimes I think about that and how much work AND relaxing I could do!

With a 7 mo, I've still got a little while to wait but when DS2 is about 2, DH and I are going on our only second trip away from kids. Maybe I can squeeze in a trip by myself too.

Anyone else sometimes look forward to the kids growing up? I've never been a person to mourn my kids growing, I love to see them learn and change and get older. My sister is so sad when her kids celebrate another birthday. I just think "yep, DS1 will be three this year and it's been three long and amazing years. Glad we're here finally."

I love my boys more than anything but also long for ME again. Time off would be nice!

 

nod.gif  I strive to be present and engaged, through the ups and downs, soak it all up - and then I don't feel any longing for the past.  I feel much more satisfied - like "yup, did that, lived it, moving on to the next cool, exciting thing!" (and a little, gradual liberation is nice)


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#20 of 28 Old 06-28-2013, 01:24 AM
 
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smile.gif I can so relate!
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#21 of 28 Old 06-28-2013, 04:40 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by skycheattraffic View Post

Susanmary, I think that'll be my wish for mother's day 2015 or 2016, depending on how our new arrival sleeps. One blissful night away... Sleep and room service wink1.gif

SCT- :-D Sleep and room service and a huge bath tub and soft robe .... :-D

2015 or 2016 will be my aim too... maybe we'll still be hanging around here and I check back on you (and this thread) to see how we are doing :-D
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#22 of 28 Old 06-28-2013, 04:53 AM
 
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Sounds good, Susanmary! We'll have a virtual girls' night out wink1.gif
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#23 of 28 Old 07-01-2013, 08:06 AM
 
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I get time away regularly -- I've done a weekend trip once a year with my mom or a girlfriend since the kids were done nursing.

But time at HOME alone would be lovely!! My DH gets a full week home alone every summer when I take the kids to visit my mom, and I'm jealous! He usually gets a big project done (builds a planter, or organizes the garage), but he also gets LOTS of time to just do whatever the heck he wants, when he wants, with no outside demands -- sounds like heaven to me!!

Now that the kids are getting bigger (they're 8 and 5), he's thinking about doing a dad-and-kids camping trip with one of his friends and all the kids, and I'm so hoping that comes to pass!

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#24 of 28 Old 07-02-2013, 07:52 PM
 
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I'm with you.  I have no advice or words of encouragement because I'm in a very similar boat... dinner, bath, bedtime, etc. EVERY FREAKING NIGHT.  No village, no family, no help. DH works long hours and is a wonderful daddy but is gone more often than home.  

 

I just want to go somewhere and read a book.  As in, the whole darn thing in one sitting. 

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#25 of 28 Old 07-02-2013, 08:06 PM
 
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Can I chime in on all this fantasy? I would love to buy a duplex someday, with one side for family, and one for adults only. Then DH and I could take turns having friends over for occasional adult socializing, and other times just be alone, relaxing or getting into a creative project. I could do all this and know I'm close enough to be there if family really needed me. Just having a kid free zone without any commuting or too much planning would be so dreamy! AND we could use it as a money-making vacation rental once in awhile. Brilliant? I think it might be!
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#26 of 28 Old 07-03-2013, 05:31 AM
 
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:-D Mama Amie... Adding to the fantasy theme... It would have to be invisible to kids too... As I know my son would be banging on the doors and walls calling "mama" if he knew I was close :-D
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#27 of 28 Old 07-03-2013, 05:32 AM
 
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Skycheattraffic ... Yay! :-)
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#28 of 28 Old 07-03-2013, 07:51 AM
 
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Originally Posted by susanmary View Post

:-D Mama Amie... Adding to the fantasy theme... It would have to be invisible to kids too... As I know my son would be banging on the doors and walls calling "mama" if he knew I was close :-D

LOL!!!

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