Hello everyone...how can I do this? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 3 Old 09-20-2005, 06:27 PM - Thread Starter
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We've been living solely off of dh's paycheck for more than three years, knowing I would someday become a SAHM. Unfortunately, as time goes by, his income keeps getting progressively reduced. It used to be that we had health insurance, cable television, monthly trips out of town to visit friends, eating out once or twice a week, and still a little bit extra left over in checking. Now we have NONE of those things and checking is a flat line.

Even that wouldn't bother me so much except that we're going to be hit with some big expenses over the next year or so, namely health insurance. It seems like we've already tightened our belts as much as we can--I don't see how we're going to squeeze out anything else. Both of us are committed to my staying at home for at least a year because we think it will be best for the baby--but how on Earth are we going to pull it off? I am so worried.

(And no, we don't qualify for social services. At all.)

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#2 of 3 Old 09-21-2005, 04:21 PM
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Hugs for you-I really feel like I understand your situation...unfortuantely I don't have any advice for you yet.
Dh and I are in the same boat. He knows how important it is for me to be home with our ds, I told him long before we decided to ttc, that I would be a sahm. Things are extremely tight-and I don't mean we cannot go out to dinner, movies, etc tight-we do not do any of those things, or go out or spend on anything but necessities, and we still barely scrape by.
It is a very tough situation to be in, and I know that I personally feel badly about it, because I know my dh worries all the time and doesn't enjoy living like this. I cannot imagine that anyone would, but I am honestly content-being with my ds is worth it.
Make sure that you take a good look at everything you're spending still-for a while dh and I thought we had cut out or cut down everything we could, then after breaking down a month, looking at every single dollar spent, we found more things that we didn't even realize.
Hopefully someone will have some good advice or ideas to pass along-there are a lot of very budget-wise, frugal mamas here...
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#3 of 3 Old 09-25-2005, 02:33 PM
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I really really like the siggie of the poster above me, KyleAnn. That's our motto. You'd be suprised how much you can save simply by using things up completely, wearing them out until you can't anymore, or by doing without. We live pretty frugally without a whole lotta nice extra's. I do have a nice car and dh just got a new truck but they were necessitities that we couldnt' find another way around. A lot of families go to one car(we couldn't) to save money or use public transportation. There's cd'ing(I know you plan on it since I know you from the cd board!), bf'ing, consignment shops for baby equipment(slings, blankets, clothing, etc), and thrift stores for everything you and your dh need. We are impulse buyers. We have recently curbed that by shopping together and making each other wait a week before buying anything to see if we really NEED it or we just want it. We line dry clothing and diapers to save on utilities. We reuse things as much as possible and buy in bulk(only when it's gonna save us money though, watch prices!). We buy off season things that we can't buy used. We do a lot of TP buys. Also, this may or may not help you but not only am I a sahm, but I'm a child care provider. I went through the air force's family child care program to become a provider to make extra money, stay at home iwth my girls, and use the things in the lending library for providers. My baby needed a high chair and we needed a double stroller for the daycare so we waited until I could get them from the lending library instead of buying new or used. They were free! Also, we avoid accumulating a lot of STUFF. We use the library for books and movies instead of buying our own. We dont' buy tons of toys for the kids that they won't end up playing with for long. We don't get tons of clothing because we know we will do fine with less anyway. We just get necessities. I knit and sew so that helps. Also, we always pack lunches or snacks when we go somewhere so that we dont' have to buy while we are out. We buy and make things from scratch most of the time so we can avoid expensive prepared foods. There are a ton of ways to cut back financially so you can stay at home with your kids and it's possible in MOST circumstances but not all. Maybe there's a job you can get that you can work from home(like a newspaper editor or such) or take baby to work with you for a while? Maybe you could babysit or be a nanny or do childcare? Be creative! There's gotta be something you could do!
Check the frugal living board and read the thread about what they all do to save a buck or two. It's pretty inspiring.



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