Originally Posted by charmarty
so it can be a little more clear...what constitutes as a major illness in your oponion? I am asking everyone.
I do remember a time when I only had one child, she was abount 6 months and I had terrible food poisoning. She spent most of the day in a play yard, I felt horrible about it later but I was so freaking sick.
I think if dh's are able to take a day off if needed it would really help out sick sahm's. But we all know that doesn't always happen
My DH has NEVER stayed home from work, but then like a PP said, he'd just make it all the more stressful and more work for me anyways.
With that said, I hardly ever get sick. I haven't been sick since the babe was born *knock on wood*, and before that when I did get sick I'd just loosen up a bit and let the kids veg in front of the tv. :
I figure it is better to have him stay home and keep me from getting so bogged down that I can't keep up for the next week...let alone this week.
Kust my $.02.
I've also called him home in the middle of the day when I was very sick and couldn't handle ds anymore alone.
I like how UUMom put it (as usual).
DH's job is very flexable, so he can work from home for a few days if need be. Basically I know myself and I know him. If he hangs around at home and I am not on death's doorstep, he will just annoy me.
If I am sick, but ok to get up, shower, play and take care of the kids, but need to take it easy, play inside and quiet games, watch movies and have a nap....he goes to work.
If I am sick, can get up for 10 minute periods and have to lay down alot, he better be home early, but I can suck up and deal (and build lego while laying down).
If the only reason I get out of bed is to run to the bathroom (to do violent bodily actions) his butt better be home and it better keep the kids from jumping on me. I do the same for him.
If both kids are sick, he runs to the drugstore/grocery store before work, and comes home early. If they are both really sick, he stays home to help me out.
He doesn't have sick days at work. They have holiday time that they use as well as "discressionary days off". Basically a manager gives them a day off if they are sick....unless they are hungover
IE, like other moms I'll suck it up if I have to (especially if he asks me to!), but there are times I just can't deal with any human contact!
I often encourage him to take "well days" too, which he does when he is not pressed for time/working on a big project.
I am lucky in that he feels it is important to be here with the kids. He did a few years of that whole working with his nose to the grindstone/late nights/etc., but it wasn't worth it in either of our opinions.
His job is closeby and he works 9-5, so there is lunchtime, going in a bit late and eating at his desk for lunch, taking a "half" day, etc.
We are fortunate that he has such a good job, and that I can stay home.
When the new babe comes he'll have 2 weeks off and then he'll "pace" himself by going back to work with half days, or a little late, or coming home at lunch, etc.
But yeah, to answer the q, I think it's reasonable -- but my dh is salaried and some weeks puts in 80 hours. So for that reason, I think it's fair.
He was like this before we had kids though. Once I had the flu and he stayed home for 3 days because he was afraid to leave me alone. I was super sick. We're really lucky that he has the type of job that allows him to put him family first.
I better be on deaths door before I ask
This year he actually got to use his sick days for himself for a change -not that that was a good thing but its a first around here)
If dd and ds are going to be home though we got it covered ( it is nice when they get older sometimes!)
I did however make him buck up and handle the kids some while sick so he has some sympathy this time- we hadn't done any of our gift shopping and I wasn't going to show up empty handed!
I am dreading tomorrow, when I am feeling feverish and my kids are over it and want to get out and run around after days being too sick to do anything but lay on the couch!
Mama to DS (8) and DD (7) Aristotle was not Belgian. The central message of Buddhism is not "Every man for himself." And the London Underground is not a political movement.
I usually just pop in a movie and let the kids eat junk and get through a crummy time the best we can.
The truest answer to violence is love. The truest answer to death is life. The only prevention for violence is for the heart to have no violence within it. We cannot prevent evil through any system devised by mankind. But we can grapple with evil and defeat it, but only with love—real love.
That being said, I had a bone mass removed from my jaw a few weeks ago and he took off a day to take me for the surgery and another to take care of the kids while I recovered.
Barney & Ben
I asked him to help out when I got mastitis really bad a few times, the flu, and things like that. When dd2 was in the hospital for 6 days he took off all 6 days b/c we didn't have any childcare for dd1 and someone had to care for her so dd2 wouldn't be alone in the hospital.
mama to a sweet girl , & 4 silly boys