I am becoming a grouch...... - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 2 Old 01-10-2006, 02:50 PM - Thread Starter
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First some background--

I'm pg and have placenta previa, which means my activities have to be somewhat restricted--no lifting anything more than 5 pounds (!), and resting a bit midday, no exercise, etc. Because I can't lift my daughter, I can't load the kids in the car and go out and about on my own. Also I can't go skating, sledding, running, etc. I'm actually cool with all this in the big picture--a few months of dropping back a bit is a small price to pay for a healthy baby. But in the day-to-day it is difficult because I often exersize when I need a lift, and I keep the kids busy with at least one good physical activity almost every day. This keeps them busy and happy--and it keeps me busy and happy too. (We are city dwellers so thay can't play outside by themselves).

Also, my DH travels constantly and is out of town again until Friday (he left last Friday). And my 5 year old is a very independent, loving, smart and ornery fellow.

So this brings me to my current state of mind, which is not a good one. I;ve noticed (and so have my two oldest dcs) that in the last few days I have become increasingly grumpy and ill-tempered. My two older boys don't listen--they really seem to care only what the other guy thinks and if the other guy wants to ignore mom and keep jumping on the bed or playing when it's time for dinner or wrestling on the living room floor on top of their sister's puzzles, then great! So I let them know what's next in a cheerful tone, then I bark at them, then I shout, then I whisper, then I try to talk to one or the other. When I finally get them to do what needs to be done, I spend that time bitterly complaining about their behavior.

Obviously it's not working. Does anyone have any advice? I've read most of the usual books--playful parenting, how to talk so kids will listen, raising your spirited child, etc. But I'll read them again or any others you suggest. Thanks for bearing with me through this screed. Hope someone can help. I'm not usually like this, and I miss my cheerful home!!!

Happy mom to DS2000, DS2002, DD2004, DS2006 and DS 10/2009:
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#2 of 2 Old 01-14-2006, 05:03 PM
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I am sorry you are going through this! I don't blame you for snapping some- I'm sure I would. If your dh has to be out of town a lot in the future, I'd see if you have a friend or family member that can come over and break things up for you- who can take the kids to the park or stay with you to help with everything. I know when my dh has to be out of town for a week, I need to make sure I have adult company or I'd go crazy.

I also suggest you find a hobby that you can do while your activities are restricted. Knitting is a nice one- it supposedly releases the same hormones as meditation, and you get a cool something you made. If that or another craft interests you, the crafts forums here are great.

Laura, Mama to Mya 7/02, Ian 6/07 and Anna 8/09
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