Hi; I'm joining in the discussion although I am a WAHM - I work 20 hours a week out of my home, ten of which I have covered by childcare and the other ten get fit in at night and on weekends, etc. But I feel that my primary role is being the go-to, at home parent. And except for those 10 hrs I have childcare I am definitely a SAHP.
I think it's comparing apples to oranges in some ways because (in my perspective anyway) being a parent is WORK but it is not really a job.
A job comes with (usually) financial compensation, responsibilities on the part of the employer to provide a certain kind of environment and a lot of supports - but in return the employee gives up his or her time and energy to meet goals that are for the benefit of the organization. (Of course it is fuzzier than that, especially with self-employed people.)
Being a parent is for me not a job - it's a mode of being. I don't stop being a parent at any time. I can't quit being a parent. I can't demand that my child provide me with regular breaks.
And I think WOHPs are exactly the same. Even if they are at work, they're parents. They're just working at that moment.
So FOR ME the question about staying home or going out to work really is about family resources. In our family when one person works less than full time, our family dynamics are in fact easier, and we are fortunate to have the financial resources to do that.
So I could say that being at home is easier for me, and that would be totally true. I do feel less rushed and frantic; I have a sense of flow in my days (not all of them!) that I am not sure I would feel if I were working 40+ hours a week.
At the same time on an hourly basis I don't always feel like it is easier. I recently was at my office for a two hour meeting - coffee was provided and I could finish a thought and I was thanked for my time. That felt refreshingly 'easy' in comparison to the two hours I spent a week later teaching my son NOT to climb up on the counters. (With considerably less success I might add
Just my experience and thoughts about it.