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#1 of 19 Old 09-04-2007, 11:14 PM - Thread Starter
 
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nak........anyone have experience w mops? we just moved, and i met a mom at the market today who invited me to come to a meeting. i'm desparate for adult conversation and dd for other kids. i haven't left her much, but i think she'd do fine, and they would bring her to me asap if needed. i'm wondering if this organization tends to be ap/natural parenting tolerant, or if i'm wasting my time.

tia!

oh yea, i x posted this in toddlers.

mountain loving, nursing, homebirthing mama to beany (12.05), zoomy (4.09), and one more in january.
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#2 of 19 Old 09-04-2007, 11:56 PM
 
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#3 of 19 Old 09-04-2007, 11:59 PM
 
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MOPS is a evangelical Christian based organization. And while it's not as in your face as, say, a revival meeting--if you are not Christian and uncomfortable in a group where everyone is assumed to be Christian then you may be *at times* uncomfortable. (this probably depends on the sponsoring church) I think sometimes when recruiting MOPS is not as forthcoming about their affiliation as they perhaps should be.

That being said, if your area is not adverse to AP methods, you're likely to encounter other AP moms. And from what I've seen in general you will find people to be tolerant of it. On the flip side of the coin, it's very likely you will meet moms who practice non-AP methods.

I go to a MOPS meeting. I am not a Christian. I find the ladies there very sweet and kind, even if we are diametrically opposed in religious and often political viewpoints--but that's why I joined. I realized one time, in going on a full out frustrated rant about "the religious right" that I sounded just as angry and dehumanizing to "them" as I felt Bill O'Reilly or Rush Limbaugh was towards me. Spending time with folks that I DO have a least one thing in common (we're all moms, with kids about the same age) but who are very different than me has really given me more tolerance and compassion, it puts a face to the the "other", and has brought more diversity into my life than I would normally choose. So I went for the adult company as well, but I went with the mindset to be stretched out of my personal comfort zone, and have enjoyed the experience.

There's still an awkward silence when someone asks where I go to church, and I mention my Unitarian Universalist church, but now it's something that I think is kind of funny, not something I have to hide. I would say that the vast majority of speakers we've had over the 2 years I've gone (this is my 3rd) have been AP-friendly when the topic is parenting. But I think you can't go to something that's conservative evangelical based and expect that you'll not run into non-AP stuff, because the audience is going to tend to be more "Traditional" than AP, if that makes sense. But it doesn't mean that you won't be welcome. Each group can be so different, to me there's no harm in going and see if it piques your interest. And if it doesn't, you can always drop!

I just mention the religious thing, because if you were invited in a non-church setting the inviter may have forgotten to mention the religious affiliation and emphasis. Though by their own bylaws, MOPS is for everyone with preschool age children, regardless of religion. But the leadership committee must all sign statements of faith and be vetted by the sponsoring church, which must be evangelical Christian. It doesn't bother me, but I think it's better to know about that in advance so that you don't get an uncomfrotable surprise if that would bother you.
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#4 of 19 Old 09-05-2007, 03:01 AM
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We have MOPS at my Roman Catholic church; I'm going to try it out when it starts back up in a few weeks. I hope to meet the other crunchy-looking moms I've seen at mass! Though I know to expect all sorts, which is good too, since I never talk with any non-AP moms.
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#5 of 19 Old 09-05-2007, 04:47 AM
 
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I was in MOPS when we lived in Virginia, and loved it. And while it is an evangelical Christian group, it's not all about religion, either. We would always do crafts and just talk and hang out. Yes, we talked about God and the Bible, but it is a very laid-back group. Or well, our's was. I have not been to the one here in Wasilla because I do a Monday morning Bible study and MOPS in also on a weekday morning, and with homeschooling, I didn't want my kids to miss schoolwork twice a week. I have several friends, though who go and they really enjoy it.

I would say give it a go and, like was already mentioned, you can always stop going if you don't like it.

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#6 of 19 Old 09-05-2007, 12:53 PM
 
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I'm on the leadership team for my MOPs so obviously I very much enjoy it! I am very much Christian! I think the ladies here have painted a pretty fair picture. Every group will be different though so if you don't like one you may like another.

Some are probably more heavy on the religous stuff than others. Our group is open to ANYONE regardless of religion. But we do pray at every meeting, we pray for each other, our families, our kids etc. We do NOT expect you to pray but we do expect you to be respectful of our prayer. We do realize that the prayer alone might make you uncomfortable.

Just some things to keep in mind.
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#7 of 19 Old 09-05-2007, 11:35 PM
 
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I go and am mostly AP, there are others that aren't, but some are. It all depends on where you live and if that is the sort of thing people do. There are other mama with slings and nursing.

They do have child-care, so if you aren't into leaving your child I would check in to the rules about bringing them in the meeting, I aways brought my baby in the meeting (nurse during) last year but my older daughter goes in the childcare and has fun.
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#8 of 19 Old 09-05-2007, 11:41 PM
 
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I love my MOPs group. In my group, child care isn't even an option until after 6 months old. Everyone, except for one person, breastfeeds. And we all breastfeed out in the meeting. It's what helped me be more comfortable with nursing in public. several mamas use slings. We talk about using gentle discipline techniques.

It's a great, supportive group at a great church. (We meet at a vineyard church). This church tends to be conservative in theology, alternative/progrssive in lifestyle. A different church might be different.
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#9 of 19 Old 09-06-2007, 12:35 AM - Thread Starter
 
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thanks ladies! i am a liberal/progressive christian, and very much ap. i have no idea what the atmosphere will be like there, parenting-wise, but i'm not opposed to being around other parenting styles. while i of course think ap is best, i realize that i can't limit my sphere of people to ap sorts, because i'd have very few people in my sphere, where we live now (a little different in nj, where we lived before). i just wanted to hear that i wouldn't be evangelized to. i'm very much a christian, and catholic, and am very happy with where i am, and can't stand being pushed to become a "real" christian. i AM one! thanks for the reassurance. this just sounds like a great way to connect with other moms.

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#10 of 19 Old 09-06-2007, 03:07 AM
 
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Originally Posted by smellyann82 View Post
nak........anyone have experience w mops? we just moved, and i met a mom at the market today who invited me to come to a meeting. i'm desparate for adult conversation and dd for other kids. i haven't left her much, but i think she'd do fine, and they would bring her to me asap if needed. i'm wondering if this organization tends to be ap/natural parenting tolerant, or if i'm wasting my time.

tia!

oh yea, i x posted this in toddlers.
Yes, I have experience with MOPS but they weren't good ones. I don't like it as an organization nationally and my three experiences with local groups in different regions of the us were just depressing. Isolation was more honest than MOPS at times. JME.
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#11 of 19 Old 09-06-2007, 11:21 AM
 
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I'm going on my 4th year attending MOPS. We have all sorts of mamas there, from various backgrounds, etc. Its nice to just sit and talk with other moms, even if we don't have *everything* in common. I am definitely more AP than most of the other mamas there, and it doesn't seem like homeschooling is all that prevalent either, but at the end of the day its nice to just sit and have breakfast with other adults, knowing that the kids are having a blast not too far away. I say give it a shot.
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#12 of 19 Old 09-06-2007, 12:09 PM
 
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I was excited to see this post when I thought it was about floor mops-I need a new one and was just thinking of you ladies at MDC and wondering what to get.

Sorry, I don't have any input on MOPS at all. Looked into it for a while, but never joined for a variety of reasons.

addicted, homeschooling, freelancing mama to DS 8. Pet mama to Harvey the Wonder Mutt :, Pnut: and Autumn : Oh, yeah, and
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#13 of 19 Old 09-06-2007, 01:22 PM
 
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I was excited to see this post when I thought it was about floor mops-I need a new one and was just thinking of you ladies at MDC and wondering what to get.

Sorry, I don't have any input on MOPS at all. Looked into it for a while, but never joined for a variety of reasons.

How funny. I like the older type where you wring it out by hang. I prefer it when the loops are cut but it doesn't really matter I suppose. But you know, my floor looks best when I get down on my hands and knees with a thick terry rag and scrub and clean it. Ask me how many times I do that though.....

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#14 of 19 Old 09-06-2007, 06:24 PM
 
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I went to our local mops ONCE and only once. It was not what I was looking for. Ours was a big tea party with some kind of preaching. And you either put your kids in the church daycare or they had to sit quietly (my kids don't do that).
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#15 of 19 Old 09-07-2007, 02:43 PM
 
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Nope. I couldn't join. I am adamantly un-christian.
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#16 of 19 Old 09-09-2007, 01:00 AM
 
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Thats the thing I found with MOPS that the women are cliquish and some are just downright mean behind the sweet 'christian' speak. If you aren't Christian or aren't the type they judge you to be, then you are out of luck and ignored or gossiped about.

I think it would be great for MOPS to really truly minister to overwhelmed moms with preschoolers (regardless of income, appearance, faith or lack thereof) but it just seems, nationally imo, to be an extension of certain church membership.

Although Christ was talked about and preached at times, it wasn't very Christ-like and I stopped going. I had other things more important to deal with.
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#17 of 19 Old 09-17-2007, 01:28 PM
 
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I'm one of the sitters during a MOPS meeting. I'm very AP. The babies are with the moms. Toddlers and up were with us next door. On the rare occasion we had a crying child we got the mom immediately.

Our group all planned get togethers during the summer.

We have school age children too. I have them do their schoolwork.

Give it a try.
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#18 of 19 Old 09-17-2007, 03:01 PM
 
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You can always give it a try.

I went to one this past week and did not have a good experience, and I won't be going back to that group, but, when we move, I might try out the next group.
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#19 of 19 Old 09-17-2007, 04:05 PM
 
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Thats the thing I found with MOPS that the women are cliquish and some are just downright mean behind the sweet 'christian' speak. If you aren't Christian or aren't the type they judge you to be, then you are out of luck and ignored or gossiped about.

I think it would be great for MOPS to really truly minister to overwhelmed moms with preschoolers (regardless of income, appearance, faith or lack thereof) but it just seems, nationally imo, to be an extension of certain church membership.

Although Christ was talked about and preached at times, it wasn't very Christ-like and I stopped going. I had other things more important to deal with.


I am sorry that would've happened. I have never been in a church like that. It's crazy that a church that professes to have Christ's love for others would treat people so terribly.
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