how blended is your family??? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 21 Old 11-19-2009, 08:43 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Sometimes I feel like a walking Jerry Springer show, I was married twice with children from both marriages, my partner has a child from a previous relationship and now we are having one together. I know I am not alone these days in this extreme version of the Brady bunch, so how blended is your family?

Nursing student, (LAST SEMESTER!!!)Cloth diapering, cosleeping, breastfeeding mama to 4!!!
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#2 of 21 Old 11-20-2009, 02:40 AM
 
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Well, it's not quite that extensive (for me, personally) but:

I have 1 DS from my 1st marriage. My first husband has 2 children (ds and dd) from his 1st marriage. I now have a 2nd DS from my new marriage. And my xh's girlfriend is due in January with his 4th child, who will be like 4 months younger than my new DS, so DS#1 is getting 2 little brothers within a few months of each other!

Whew. Did you get all that. :-)

lol

Mom, wife, full-time student.  And tired.  DH, DS#1 (9/99) and DS#2 (9/09), and 2 dogs.

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#3 of 21 Old 11-20-2009, 02:41 AM
 
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Oh, and frolick, congrats on the new baby coming!

Mom, wife, full-time student.  And tired.  DH, DS#1 (9/99) and DS#2 (9/09), and 2 dogs.

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#4 of 21 Old 11-20-2009, 10:18 AM
 
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I had twins with my high school sweetheart shortly out of college (we weren't married). Now my husband (different guy) and I have a baby together. My ex and his new wife are about to have a baby, so the twins will have half-siblings in both homes.

Furthermore, my husband has custody of his son from a previous marriage, so the twins have a step-sibling at home, too. My husband and I get along so well with my ex and his wife that she acted as godmother for my step-son when he was baptized (obviously not as a baby). My step-son refers to my ex and his wife as his godmother and "step-dad" (which is puzzling to people who know that his actual mother is not remarried...;-) )

Additionally, my husband was married before, in college. It was kind of a sweet, idealistic thing that didn't last, where to some extent he felt he was rescuing a childhood friend, whose young son's dad wasn't in the picture. So, my husband ALSO has that step-son (for whom he's been the only father) and a biological child, with that first wife. Both of them were college-age by the time we got married.

Also, my ex's parents were divorced, so the twins have his dad and step-mom as one set of grandparents, and his mom, as well.

I have long ago accepted how "normal" a lot of this stuff is today and I spend my time trying to make the relationships civil and functional, rather than feeling guilty about te "broken homes". Yet, I still hope to raise my kids to have one marriage that lasts.

One woman in a house full of men:  my soul mate:    or... twin sons:(HS seniors) ... step-son:  (a sophomore) ... our little man:   (a first grader) ... and there is another female in the house, after all:  our
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#5 of 21 Old 11-20-2009, 10:27 AM
 
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Just one stepdaughter. I've been married before, but we had no kids together. Our respective stepchildren (my ex's and mine) are best friends now, though, and they are convinced that they are "ex stepsisters in law." (Dunno who told them that.)

Oh.

And, assuming this sticks:


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Spouse (the political geek) * Stepdaughter (the artist) * and introducing...the Baby (um, he's a baby? He likes shiny things).
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#6 of 21 Old 11-20-2009, 10:28 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I always say, let me draw you a diagram. The other funny part is that sometimes we all hang out (exes, new kids, ex step grandparents) one big happy family.

Nursing student, (LAST SEMESTER!!!)Cloth diapering, cosleeping, breastfeeding mama to 4!!!
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#7 of 21 Old 11-20-2009, 10:31 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ProtoLawyer View Post
Oh.

And, assuming this sticks:


love.gif

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#8 of 21 Old 11-20-2009, 01:17 PM
 
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Haha! I like how you just slipped that one in , ProtoLawyer! Congrats!!!


I had a boy with my ex and my husband had two kids(a boy and a girl)from his previous marriage. Together we had two boys(in two years, WHEW!)so now we have 5 together!!!

We don't call them half anything. They are all brothers and sisters, no matter WHAT my husband's ex says about it!!!
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#9 of 21 Old 11-20-2009, 05:14 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ProtoLawyer View Post
Oh.

And, assuming this sticks:

Congratulations!!

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#10 of 21 Old 11-20-2009, 05:55 PM
 
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Wow - it's difficult enough for us, I can't imagine juggling everything some of you do!! My kids' dad is totally not in the picture, hubby has no bio kids. My kids do have siblings through their dad but they are also not in the picture.
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#11 of 21 Old 11-20-2009, 06:08 PM
 
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Yeah it's crazy for some of us. DSD#1 from DH's ex #1, DSD#2 from DH ex#2, DSS#3 and DSD#4 (I number per birth order, not gender order) from Ex #3 and then we had DD. Oh if this counts DSD#1 has 1 kid and one on the way...

Congrats ProtoLawyer!!

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#12 of 21 Old 11-20-2009, 08:45 PM
 
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DH and I both have 2 children each from our first marriages. We're having 1 together and my ex-husband has 2 more children.

Our rainbow baby, Anna Beatrice was born April 11/2010 after 4 m/c. She joins 4 brothers and sisters.
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#13 of 21 Old 11-21-2009, 11:27 AM
 
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Originally Posted by nicoolmama View Post
We don't call them half anything. They are all brothers and sisters, no matter WHAT my husband's ex says about it!!!
Same here!

One woman in a house full of men:  my soul mate:    or... twin sons:(HS seniors) ... step-son:  (a sophomore) ... our little man:   (a first grader) ... and there is another female in the house, after all:  our
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#14 of 21 Old 11-21-2009, 11:36 AM
 
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Super simple over here (for now )
Just DP and I, raising DSD (16 y.o.)
She has two siblings on her mom's side. Hopefully, we can add a couple over here as the time goes by.

New endeavor coming soon...
Raising Alice in Wonderland (DSD, 17), and in love with a Superman
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#15 of 21 Old 12-03-2009, 09:21 AM
 
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HMMM.
Our first daughter was a product of me and DH fighting and me getting pg after a one night slip up with my best friend (I was on bc, got pg anyway) The said best friend took his life nine days later before he knew I was pregnant. As far as DH is concerned (he knows her paternity) she is his daughter, end of story. The bio father's family want nothing to do with her, end of story. (very sad).
DH and I went on to have three children together...we split a few years ago for a little over a year and I was with the ex-he beat me up one night and raped me, I got pg from that night and he promptly left (a blessing). Dh and I got back together and had the baby (he's almost 2, now) and again, as far as DH is concerned, that is his child.
The ex has nothing to do with the little guy, I don't see him or talk to him at all. The ex's mom has random contact. The ex also got another girl pg while he and I were together, and he has a young daughter from a previous relationship. I don't see those two very often. I don't know that our little guy will have much contact in the future with them.
I have family members who are horrified at me for all this (???) and think that DH is king of the universe for loving two children that aren't 'his'. DH's family ranges from absolutely refusing to even look at me to loving the kids. As far as the kids are concerned they are all siblings and there is no such thing as 'half this' or 'half that'.

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#16 of 21 Old 12-03-2009, 10:50 AM
 
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I have 3 DSs from my first marriage, DH has a DD from his first marriage, and we have a DS together. My ex has a DD from his first marriage but he has not been involved in her life for years and my DSs have never met her. DH's ex has 3 children besides DSD, two older and one younger. The youngest is just a little younger than my youngest DS (got all that?) and we babysit her frequently. I never know what to call her- Sissy's sissy?

I guess it's just the norm these days. My parents are divorced and remarried, so my kids have 3 sets of grandparents. Actually my older kids have 4 sets because they have their dad's parents as well as DH's mom. Okkay, too confusing for this early in the morning!
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#17 of 21 Old 12-04-2009, 01:43 PM
 
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To the OP: You aren't even CLOSE to being a Jerry Springer show lol! I have two children from a previous fiance/relationship. My DH has two children, both from separate GF relationships. He is adopting my two children (their father walked out of their life and signed them over), so technically they all have the same last name and same father. AND we are expecting our first (and last!) baby together, due July 1st!

Mommy to four under age 4!
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#18 of 21 Old 12-05-2009, 09:51 PM
 
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Married twice, a baby from each one. Pretty tame considering I came from the following:

My mother has three children from two partners.
My father has three children from two partners.
My stepmother has two children from two partners.
My brother has two children from two partners (that we know of, anyway lol).

But we're all one big happy family as far as anyone else is concerned! It gets confusing sometimes, but it's how it goes. I don't think you should worry about something like that, though. You're not alone. Blended families are pretty normal these days.

Mom to Marc (11/10/01) and Charlotte (9/30/09). Cloth diapering, baby-wearing, tree hugging hippy mama. I had a natural VBAC in 2009! Just wanted to brag...!
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#19 of 21 Old 12-06-2009, 01:41 AM
 
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Haha, these are fun.

I have 2 daughters with my ex-husband. I have 1 son with my current fiance. My ex-husband is engaged to a woman who has 1 son and they are having twins together. Lots of sudden new siblings for my girlies. Craziness.

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#20 of 21 Old 12-08-2009, 05:11 AM
 
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Let's see.....


In our household we have my DH and our kids..."my" DS (13), "his" DD (8) and "our" DD (5 months)

In DS's father's house (my ex-husband) there is a step-brother and a step-sister, who also has a 9 month old DD.
In DSD's mother's (his ex-wife) house there is a older "half" brother (12), a step-brother (11) and a new "half" brother (6 months)
So..DSD has a baby sister at her dad's and a baby brother at her mom's who are only 3 wks apart.

I also still have a relationship with my deceased fiance's 2 son's who are 6 and 5 yrs old. As well as with his side of the family (parents and sister & her kids)


Needless to say, holidays around here are kind of crazy sometimes!

DS-(1996), DSD-(2001), and our miracle baby girl-(7/7/09) and Always remembering my 3 brokenheart.gif angel babies
and cautiously due May 12, 2011!
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#21 of 21 Old 12-08-2009, 01:44 PM
 
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LOL How blended is there?


I have 2 children from a previous marriage, He has one child from a previous relationship and another from a previous.. um.. night of indescresion.
We also have one together, and we also have children for couples who can't (surrogacy) We consider them our family as well.


So yeah, how blended is there lol

Loving Dh, Mama x 4, Surrogate mother to 5. A born 2003, M and R girl/girl twins 2006, S and C boy/girl twins born 2010. Processing/healing.
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