Proto's thread recalled some recent things with my DSD and the ever evolving/figuring out of a stepparents role in their DSC's life.
Over the weekend DSD's homework page was a special homework for parents to go over "safe touch" and "bad touch" and privacy, etc.
Poor DH was a little shocked that DSD was getting something this in depth at her age. (She is 5 and in kindergarten). He asked me to help chime in on the subject as a trusted female to DSD.
At first I was a little, "um, not sure, I think this should soley come from her parent..." But DH has been pretty adamant that DSD's parents are just as important in her life and we have a right to be active in parenting her.
We let DSD's Mom know of the homework at pick up and that we went over it with DSD. She wasn't surprised and seemed okay that I was a part of it.
I guess a lot of factors play a role in how invovled a step parent is with some of these things... But I guess the more I think on it the open communication is, I think, a pretty good approach to take. It can't hurt for DSD to have more trusted adults in her life.
It kind of reminds me when I was a teenager... I was very close to my friend's Mom and I went to her to ask/talk about a lot of sex type questions and I told her how I went to Planned Parenthood on my own and got birth control. My Mom found out later that I had talked about a lot of this stuff with my friend's Mom and was really hurt and I think she was even upset at my friend's Mom for never telling her about it.
She got over it pretty quickly though and later told me that she was happy that I was able to have someone I felt comfortable enough talking to about that sort of thing, even if it wasn't her.
I'm not really sure where I'm going with this... but I think it's to say... I sometimes feel people overthink stepparents and their roles and what they should or shouldn't do.
Like discipline... Any care provider a child will have, be at daycare, at church, at school, etc has the right to guide the child away from a dangerous situation, as well as enforce that particular places rules.
A child is able to talk to their teacher, counselor, favorite Aunt/Uncle, family friend, etc about whatever they feel comfortable talking to them about...
So why does a step parent always feel that they have no place/right to do some of these things when everyone else is okay with no questions, no gasps of only a bio parent should do xyz...
Just some food for thought this morning. lol