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i would definitely look into counseling for the boy. His behavior isn't really that surprising (and please don't take this the wrong way - i understand that you need to also look out for the other children) - the parental figures in his life have effectively washed their hands of him, and he's trying to get someone's attention.
In addition to counseling (which you and dad should be involved in), dad needs to rethink his hands-off stance wrt parenting/disciplining his son because he lives with grandma. The boy needs his dad more - not less. Imo, of course.
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