The week before mother's day, DSD and DGD were over (so was SS, and the other DGD) Well, as SD was leaving, she said that she would see us the next Sat afternoon, they stay with us because they are 2 hours away. Well, as she was leaving I let her know that we were supposed to go to my parents house for a Mother's day dinner on that Sat evening, and of course everyone was welcome, but apparently, all she heard was me saying that we had plans, and she just left
Well, DH tells me today that she told him that she felt unwelcome over here, because of what I said (that was misheard, I assume) and there is just a yucky feeling that she has about being welcome here (she is)
Well, I don't like icky things being left unsaid, so I emailed her this morning and told her that she is always welcome, and I explained about what I had said that day when she was leaving (perhaps she didn't hear well because she was on her way out the door. (she said I was "quick" to say that we were busy, but I was trying to let her know the deal before she left and they were on the way out)
It wasn't a long dragged out email, I ended telling her that I was here if she ever wanted to talk. it was simple, short and to the point. The reason I even sent it was because I would have hated for her to feel that she was unwelcome over here.
I asked DH about it, and he said that she called him when she got my email, she called it a "page long" (it was a paragraph, and not a long one) and said that she didn't know how to respond, so she didn't. She just called and talked to DH on speaker, I felt soo uncomfortable, I hate feeling misunderstood, and that she feels like she is putting me out (she isn't)
I want to talk to her, but think it would be a mistake to try and k=make contact with her again
I really had no idea how difficult this blended family thing would be with adult children. Add expectations and grandchildren, and who knows WHAT to make of it.
Now I feel so awkward.
Did I make a mistake trying to send her an email?? (it was in no way confrontational) I am a sweet person, and mean nothing but the best, I have kind intentions. I hate feeling misunderstood.
Well, DH tells me today that she told him that she felt unwelcome over here, because of what I said (that was misheard, I assume) and there is just a yucky feeling that she has about being welcome here (she is)
Well, I don't like icky things being left unsaid, so I emailed her this morning and told her that she is always welcome, and I explained about what I had said that day when she was leaving (perhaps she didn't hear well because she was on her way out the door. (she said I was "quick" to say that we were busy, but I was trying to let her know the deal before she left and they were on the way out)
It wasn't a long dragged out email, I ended telling her that I was here if she ever wanted to talk. it was simple, short and to the point. The reason I even sent it was because I would have hated for her to feel that she was unwelcome over here.
I asked DH about it, and he said that she called him when she got my email, she called it a "page long" (it was a paragraph, and not a long one) and said that she didn't know how to respond, so she didn't. She just called and talked to DH on speaker, I felt soo uncomfortable, I hate feeling misunderstood, and that she feels like she is putting me out (she isn't)
I want to talk to her, but think it would be a mistake to try and k=make contact with her again
I really had no idea how difficult this blended family thing would be with adult children. Add expectations and grandchildren, and who knows WHAT to make of it.
Now I feel so awkward.
Did I make a mistake trying to send her an email?? (it was in no way confrontational) I am a sweet person, and mean nothing but the best, I have kind intentions. I hate feeling misunderstood.