Originally Posted by Smithie
...the two of you might decide...that as things stand now, your stepson has a home with his mother and regular evenings out with his father. Later on, when the boys are older, you might mutually decide that your dss should have overnight visitation at your house.
This would definitely be better for the OP's child than living with another kid who bullies him.
But her BF needs to prioritize his
child, too! If he doesn't, then what kind of man is she trying to build a life with? He should work on getting his son not to bully, BUT:
#1- From what she's said, that doesn't sound like a priority to him. If he does not recognize on his own
that his son's behavior is a problem and he does not make a concerted effort to address it on his own
, then she needs to ask herself whether her BF actually thinks the behavior is fine and only says otherwise because she nags him? Love does not solve everything, especially in blended families.
#2- This man should not
make shacking up with his GF his top priority, if that means his own child is unwelcome in his home and that he spends less time
with his son (i.e., opts out of overnight visits). I would rather live separately from a man I loved, than see evidence that he'd give up time with his kid, to be with me! Yikes! Both of these people were parents first
and must remember that. Neither of them should prioritize living together, over what they need to do as parents. If the BF's son resents or just doesn't like the OP's son, imagine how much worse that would be, after the BF's son figured out his Dad gave up overnights with him and reduced their family
time to evenings at McDonald's, in order to live with the OP and HER son. There have to be priorities.