dh is the most amazing person and lover. no drama, no fights,we are completely compatable. hes such a great dad to our daughter and my boys. hes so selfless, ive never met anyone like him
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Unassisted birthing, atheist, poly, bi WOHM to 4 wonderful, smart homeschooling kids Wes (14) Seth (7) Pandora Moonlilly (2) and Nevermore Stargazer (11/2012) Married to awesome SAH DH.
I didn't really worry that it might fall apart. After having been in a committed relationship for so long, I didn't care if it lasted or not. I wasn't looking for and didn't need a permanent relationship. But I knew it would last. I had dated other people, casually, between my split with my ex and meeting my now-DH. When we met up again, I knew we'd be together.
There's no point in being afraid of what might happen. Date for fun rather than for seriousness. Actually, there was one guy that I really wanted a relationship with in that period between leaving ex and meeting DH. I knew we weren't right for each other but I wanted to force it and effectively drove him away. When you know it's not right, it's not right. The joy is in finding the one who is.
I didn't really worry that it might fall apart. After having been in a committed relationship for so long, I didn't care if it lasted or not. I wasn't looking for and didn't need a permanent relationship. But I knew it would last.
I was especially convinced after he met my kids (10 and 13 at the time), and they instantly liked each other.
So, I sold our house, rented an apartment, worked two jobs, rehomed the rescued animals we'd accumulated over the years and my parents invited me to move in with them in Alaska (I lived in Wisconsin at the time). I agreed to do that after my 1 year lease was up and did what I had to to minimize all my earthly possessions and get my pet exams and certifications for cross-country road travel.
In the meantime, I researched Alaska and jobs and environment and opportunities at the computer at the libraries in Madison. During this research, I found a potential home for one of my dogs that my mother wouldn't permit me to have in her home through a chat room and I also met my now-husband in said chat room. I met a lot of Alaskans who I occasionally chatted with updates of my upcoming move and who sometimes called me. I didn't really invest in getting to know any of them well, my now-husband included, because I wasn't interested in developing an internet relationship. I figured I had plenty of time to get to know them in person after I moved. And I did meet a couple of them in person after the move, my now-husband included.
Our first 'date' was a week after I arrived in Alaska. We spent over 5 hours talking about our first marriages, how it ended, what we hoped for relationship-wise from a future partner, how we handled our divorce, how we coped, our dreams and ambitions in life, etc. A couple days later, he called me saying he wanted to see me again. We went on a road trip together and talked, talked, talked. Then the next day, same thing, lots of talking and for about a week we were together almost nonstop and the rest is history.
Katreena, 39 year old Alaskan Mama to 1 and 1
When I got out of the pool, he came over to me and told he'd be at the pool that Friday. I didn't go, but went a week or two later, and the same guy was there. We talked, I gave him a ride home, and we've been inseparable ever since (it's been over a year).
Single mama to a 5yo and 8yo
I read his profile & he looked interesting. It said he was online so I opened a chat window & said hi. He didn't respond for probably 10 minutes and I was about to go offline when he said hi back. We ended up talking for a few hours and ended the conversation with him giving me his number and asking me to call him that night. It turns out, he had just changed his location on his profile about 15 minutes before I popped up on his screen. He was in Calgary still but had everything lined up to move here (he just needed a change... someone else had just contacted him & he realized it was dumb to continue to meet people in a city he was leaving in 3 weeks) After he moved here, we saw each other every few days until during one visit he started to feel really sick and ended up staying with us for the week while he had a kidney stone (so romantic, I know!) Once he was feeling better he went back home, but it was never the same... it was really hard to say goodbye. The kids love him and were pestering me with "Why does Andrew have to go? Why can't he live here with us?When is he coming over again?" pretty much constantly. Then his room-mates broke up and he was looking for a place to live, so rather than find somewhere else to be for a few months he moved right in here.
I don't know hat it isn't going to fall apart again. I DO know that this relationship is healthy, there's no abuse going on and everyone is happy. We work every day to keep things that way and I feel confident that we can continue this way, but I don't KNOW everything will be this good forever.
~Teresa, raising DS (Jan. 02) and DD1 (Jun. 04) and DD2 (Dec. 11) with DH.
I just love reading stories about how people met.
Keep 'em coming!
Single mama to a 5yo and 8yo
Step mom to Malakie, Cameron , and Aurelia
One day at lunch my boss and I were walking through this parking lot and I heard someone call my name from a pizza place. I turned and this tall very attractive looking man was running towards me-I hadn't seen him since 1996! He gave me a big hug and asked if I remembered him. I said-Tony T.! Maybe you should have asked that before you assaulted me!! lol
We chatted for a minute and then parted. We chatted on FB a bit over the next five months but nothing more than hi, how's it going. Fast forward to July last year. I was moving and needed help moving a refridgerator. I put a note of FB about needing help. Nothing. The next day I changed it to-Please help me move my fridge! Free beer. And he saw I was online and said he would help me out.
He helped me move everything I had left in my house! Plus we hung out for a bit through out the day. He invited me and my dds to go swim at his dad's house. We were just being friends by this point though I was very smitten with him. The next day (after swimming) I invited him over for dinner. We went out (first date) that weekend. After, he called me EVERY morning before I took my dds to school. He moved in the next month. It was fast, but never felt like it was too fast. We just fit. I never doubted from that first kiss that we would be together for a LONG time.
She was my daughter's daycare provider.
Just had an instant vibe.
Still going strong over a year later.
Are you that couple? It was a nice story actually--same situation--exactly.
Or wait, maybe the formerly married wife had two boys--?
I am pretty sure that couple was in Northern Virginia...or Maryland.
But seriously, there was a story exactly like this on TV. And I remember watching it and thinking--wow imagine meeting someone like that after you've known them all along.
I messaged him after I saw that he had looked at my profile a couple of times and not messaged me. We started chatting, I impulsively asked him out for that same night, and we've been together from that day to this
It wasn't hard. I thought it would be, but it wasn't. We went through a lot of difficult things together due to some crappy circumstances that were happening in his life in the beginning of our relationship, but falling in love and deciding to stay together despite the crap- it really hasn't been hard at all. Even during the worst period we went through, we didn't break up and we both had a strong feeling that we should wait a while and see how we felt when the storm was over, and we came out on the other side more in love than we were going in. It was terrifying and emotionally difficult, but it wasn't hard in the sense of it being hard to stay together.
Maybe it would feel like it was hard if it had happened with the wrong person, but with the right one, it was just doing what we had to do to stay in each other's lives and build our family, and that made it easier- does that make sense?
I was scared though that it wouldn't work out and spent a great deal of the first year or two of our relationship doubting that it would stay together. Nine months after we met, he took a job in CA and was gone for two years. I told him that if we could get through that, we could get through anything. He got a job back here a few months ago and now we are planning our wedding. This is a second marriage for both of us, and we are both very aware of the mistakes we both made to contribute to our marriages not working out.
I am a big believer that it takes two people to be in a relationship and two people to make it work or not work. I don't like placing all the blame on one person or another. I think they key to successful second relationships is knowing what went wrong the first time (meaning, what did I do to contribute to the break up) and then not let that happen again. Everytime I see myself falling back into old habits or about to do or say something, I try to stop myself. It's not his fault that I was hurt the first time around. (I also think that it helps that I am 10 years older this time...deciding to get married at 21 isn't always the best idea.)
It is scary to hand your life and your feelings over to someone again, but I wouldn't take it back for anything!
It's been great ever since, so different from my first marriage. No drama! He's totally reliable and very considerate, totally unlike my ex. My whole family loves him and my life is just so much more rewarding now.
Mama to 3 awesome girls: DD1 born 2001, DD2 born 2002, DD3 born March 2011
Reconnected briefly on Facebook, got our kids together to meet up, and then pretty much instantly fell in love. He still lived, coparenting with his ex, and I was still with my ex. It took awhile to get ourselves in a place where we could be openly together, and disentangle from our previous partners, but we are so very happy, and expecting a new addition to our family! And fortuitously, both our ex's are involved with other people, too, and seemingly happy. Our kids get along famously. It still feels like a lucky magic thing.
I don't worry about if it will last or not. I truly believe in yin/yang/balance. You have to experience sad to experience happy, etc. That said, we both see ourselves growing old together, which neither of us saw with our previous partners. We've also both learned a lot about relationships and making them work through past mistakes.
Loving mama to A (8/5/2010) R (1/3/2015) and DSD (16).
The funny thing is that Home Makeover was building a house for a local family and I'd given a friend a ride to the construction/filming site. Therefore, I did my laundry nearby the site so that I could pick her up afterward. It wasn't the laundromat that I usually went to. And my husband usually did his laundry on Saturday but decided to do it on Sunday that particular weekend. So I was at a laundromat I never went to and he did his laundry on a day that he normally wouldn't have. We both feel that it was fate/meant to be.
I was actually very happy with my life at that time. I wasn't looking to meet anyone, having recently had a relationship end. But I was open to meeting someone and had an uncanny feeling that day that I would meet someone very special. ... I told concerned friends and family that it would all come out in the wash. LOL Seriously, I couldn't be happier.
We were great friends but NEVER thought of anything romantic between us.
Then I started my divorce... and we met in person a couple times and started dating after that because we realized, in person, there were a lot of feelings there.
Well, we ended up chatting for a long time like we'd always known each other, and dd and I moved in a few days later. A couple of weeks after that, the guy and I realized we had feelings for each other, and we've been together ever since. Together almost 12 years, married almost 4, and 3 children together (plus dd1).
Anna , partner to Chad , mommy to Aidan (10/12/04) and Nate (07/18/06) , and Violet (10/23/07) .