Bm wants to take the skids over seas for 12 months - Page 2 - Mothering Forums

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#31 of 31 Old 01-24-2012, 05:35 PM
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Originally Posted by Prin View Post

Bio Mother, is wanting DH to have zero contact for the 12 months no skype no phone contact.


She is wanting to serve him with court when she gets home.  With I want to take the kids over seas to some country for 12 months at some time after 2014...   


Originally Posted by PoppyMama View Post

Unless your dh is bad enough to lose all custody your dsc mother will not get  a judge to order that.


What make you think she is demanding no phone/skype.  If he has visitation now it just doesn't seem rational.


Originally Posted by Prin View Post

From her last text msg..   Stating that she would rather dh have zero contact and this is a way of doing it..


Yes, Bio mother isnt the smarted cookie. 


#1 - MAKE SURE you preserve those text messages, for court!!  Photograph them.  Print them out.  Write down the date and time your DH received them and subpoena certified copies of them from the cell phone provider, before court.  If your DH uses a "go phone", he may believe there are no records.  But there probably are.  He can probably get them with a subpoena and it probably must be within one year of when the message was sent.


The problem, if your DH has the kids just under 15% of the time, is a judge might say the kids are accustomed to spending so much time with Mom that it's in their best interest not to be separated from her for a year...especially if she has no plans (and perhaps no funds) for international visits.


It is critically important to be able to prove:

- Your DH's parenting time isn't so slim due to indifference on his part.  He wants more time.

- Mom places so little value on the girls' relationship with him that she wants to cut off contact completely.

- A year abroad is part of her plan to terminate contact.


If your DH is able to show those things in court (if Mom proves before she even goes that she won't facilitate contact or visits while the kids are gone), then no decent judge should let her take them.  And if a judge does, it would be worth appealing.


#2 - If you and your DH live close enough to Mom that the girls could live with you and not change schools, then most likely a judge would say it's in the girls' best interest to stay here with you guys.  American family court judges tend to frown more on "uprooting" children than they smile on the wonders of immersion in a foreign culture.  Especially if Mom won't be gone forever.


#3 - Are you in the States?


#4 - Was Mom saying she wants to cut off contact forever and that the year abroad would be a good time to start?  That's what I took, from what you wrote.


One woman in a house full of men:  my soul mate:    or... twin sons:(HS seniors) ... step-son:  (a sophomore) ... our little man:   (a first grader) ... and there is another female in the house, after all:  our
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