SO not sure if anyone deals with this but my ex can be quite blunt and rude, well last weekend he took it to a whole new level. He cam to ds's bball game and they lost, the team is at a lower skills level than most the team but they are improving since the beginning of the season. So my ex finally came to a game, yay! Or so I thought. He was immediately annoyed our dd wouldn't sit with him and then when ds was done we were all walking out and he told ds he did horrible. That was the first thing he says to his son whom he hasn't even seen play a sport in like 2 years! My dh was very angry and so was I. Once in the car I told ds he was not horrible...Then dh chimed in and agreed. It left a sick feeling in both my and dh's stomache.
I talked to ds about it the next day, and he said "dad is mean, dad is a bully. I don't want dad to go to my games anymore." How heartbreaking.
Ex then called a couple days later and said he would apologize to ds likely his fiance said he was in the wrong and that is why he called to find out if ds was mad at him.
So he thinks I am turning our son against him but in reality he is doing that all on his own. He already got upset because ds was going to bible study. I pulled him out of that to reduce the drama. But ds is resentful of his father.
Then conferences were last night. Ds wrote a thank you letter to me and his teacher for going to conference, he then wrote 'maybe dad' and scratched out 'maybe' cause he knew his dad would be upset but wasn't sure if he would even go. Just beyond frustrating. He then tears apart ds's one B+ in math, says he is going to work with him at home, doesn't give him and compliments for all his A's or his darn B+, acts annoyed he didn't know they were off school eventhough i gave him a calendar with all the days off of school. Tells ds he will try to get him tomorrow night (yeah right)!
My ds is just becoming so aware of his dads lack of interest in his day to day life, I do not know what to do for ds. Dh tries as best he can but it just annoys me that Ex puts ds at a distant 4th in his life. First work, then dd, then fiance and then ds. Grrh!
I talked to ds about it the next day, and he said "dad is mean, dad is a bully. I don't want dad to go to my games anymore." How heartbreaking.
Ex then called a couple days later and said he would apologize to ds likely his fiance said he was in the wrong and that is why he called to find out if ds was mad at him.
So he thinks I am turning our son against him but in reality he is doing that all on his own. He already got upset because ds was going to bible study. I pulled him out of that to reduce the drama. But ds is resentful of his father.
Then conferences were last night. Ds wrote a thank you letter to me and his teacher for going to conference, he then wrote 'maybe dad' and scratched out 'maybe' cause he knew his dad would be upset but wasn't sure if he would even go. Just beyond frustrating. He then tears apart ds's one B+ in math, says he is going to work with him at home, doesn't give him and compliments for all his A's or his darn B+, acts annoyed he didn't know they were off school eventhough i gave him a calendar with all the days off of school. Tells ds he will try to get him tomorrow night (yeah right)!
My ds is just becoming so aware of his dads lack of interest in his day to day life, I do not know what to do for ds. Dh tries as best he can but it just annoys me that Ex puts ds at a distant 4th in his life. First work, then dd, then fiance and then ds. Grrh!