Meeting his kids for the first time tomorrow - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 2 Old 05-19-2017, 09:20 AM - Thread Starter
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Lightbulb Meeting his kids for the first time tomorrow

Good morning!

I have been with my boyfriend for three years now and tomorrow is finally THE day! His children are young (8, 7, & 4) so we decided early on that we'd take our time on when I'd be introduced to them. Our town is having a festival this weekend with rides, games, etc. so the plan is to all go to the festival together. They've met me a few times but only as a friend to their dad, not as a girlfriend to their dad. Their mom (who has borderline personality disorder) is in a relationship and last month introduced the kids to her boyfriend after only three months of dating. The kids seem to be pretty accepting of him and they get excited to see him.

I'm worried it won't go as well for me but I'm trying to stay positive but realistic at the same time. Their mother has started the process of parental alienation toward their dad and they seem to be fairly protective of her (especially the little girl who's 7).

Does anyone have any "first date" advice for my big day tomorrow? I feel like I have first date jitters, big interview jitters and asking for a pay raise jitters. Would love any advice on how to handle myself tomorrow. I don't want to try too hard but I'm worried I will.
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#2 of 2 Old 05-21-2017, 11:22 AM
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I think the biggest thing is to just enjoy yourself! You are going to a fun event, try to relax and just go with the flow. How much have you been around any kids before? If these are the first kids that you will have ever really interacted with then that is going to make it a little more interesting. Get down to their level, let them set the pace, be friendly but not pushy, and don't fawn over their dad! Kids are possessive little monsters at times (said with love...) and excessive hand holding, being lovey dovey with their dad will probably not go down well. Biggest thing, have fun!! And honest! Do not put on an act as kids are normally pretty good at spotting fake from a mile away.

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advice , bpd , first time , kids , meeting

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