that's silly. sounds to me like she was just looking for a rationalization for her desire to keep her child all to herself. just because her friends are bad stepmoms doesn't mean all stepmoms are bad! i'm sure she knows that deep down and is just using the "stepmom" angle as an excuse for her own over-possessiveness of her child.
i would LOVE to be a stepmom. i love having my own daughter, and if my life path leads me to a single mama who wants a stepmom for her kids, i'd love to have a blended family and help raise her kids right along with mine.
my mom was married to a guy who hated kids, so i never really accepted him as a stepdad, so i definitely know how much it can suck to have a step-parent who isn't into it. my first stepmom wasn't perfect by a long shot, but it was still better having her there during my adolescence than it would have been without her. my dad is remarried now and i love my stepmom, she's a friend of the family from way back.
i wish people would get over their crappy judgments about stepparents and blended families. i'm looking forward to being a stepmom someday!