How long have you know your DSD? I think over time, you will develop a bond.
I've known my stepkids since they were 5 & 7. My dsd was 7 when she hopped into the shower with me
I figured she was just curious and wanted to see a 'different' woman's body, assuming she's seen her mom naked. Well, while she was showering with me, she blurted out "Your legs are fat." Just all matter of fact!
I really didn't know what to say at first but I am well aware of my cellulite and at that time I was NOT fat. I had to tell her that if she didn't like my fat legs that she could get out of the shower in a funny sort of tone
Obviously, that little encounter really helped me see that these kids of dh's really wanted to get closer in some sense... DSS has ALWAYS been very modest and FREAKS if I see him in his boxerbriefs but DSD has always been a naked sort of girl
Course, my son just had to get the naked gene! And he LOVES to be nude as well.
We never really dealt with cosleeping with dh's kids as they always prefered and still do 50% of the time, to sleep together. They are VERY close.
They would certainly climb into bed with us in the morning which was a bit interesting at first since I do still nude.
Personally, I think its harder for me to have a solid stepmother/stepdaughter relationship than with my stepson. For whatever reason, I don't feel comfortable competing with the ex... does that make any sense? I don't want her to go back to her mom and say Annie's a way better mom than you...
Which of course I am!