Last school year I was sahm to my infant son, and sah-step mama to dh's almost-six year old daughter. It turned out to be a situation that I thought was inappropriate for myself and my family. I went from having no kids to having two, I was unable to get the support of other first-time moms because they were never available to do the things I needed to do to keep dsd thriving, and I couldn't connect with moms of kids her age because, well, I didn't really have one. Not to mention I'm fairly young for having an infant, and WAY younger than the mom's of school-aged kids. And furthermore, dsd is a HANDFUL! Whether it's that she's spirited or that she is having behavior problems due to a lack in stability (which we have been and are trying to change), she has major tantrums nearly every time she is unable to have what she wants. We're talking full-blown screaming, wailing, throwing herself on the ground, throwing things, etc...over pretty simple things like getting dressed for school before having breakfast.
It was not working, and I was getting some seriously bad feelings built up towards everyone involved.
So I have decided that I can't do it, and I'm putting my foot down. But that means an extra 300 bucks for childcare...that we don't really have. To me, feeling good about my family is worth living in a one-bedroom apartment and sleeping in the living room. But dh is super pissed about it. He demanded to know why he should have to give up everything that's important to him (i.e. premium movie channels) so I "can have free time." He said "so you get to have this free time...and what do I get? What's my payment?"
Woah. Like....I'm in debt because I watched your daughter for a whole year? What was my payment for doing it in the first place? I do not believe that this is my obligation. I just don't even know what to say.