Okay, a little background first, so this makes some sence.
I'm not married yet, but have been with dp for a while and we have a baby girl due next month. Me and my ex have gotten along pretty well, niether of us have problems with who each other is dating etc.
Well, my dd (almost 3) came home from her dads the other day, and started talking, going through her list of who she loves (we do this all the time, its cute) well, she kept saying dp can't love her and she can't love him, when normally she says she loves him and will say he loves her too. I asked why and she really didn't say, so I left it alone. Well a couple days later I ask her if she wants to go take lunch to dp, and usually she loves this and gets excited about seeing him at work, but this time she says no, she can't want to go, she can't love dp no more. WTF?? So I let her stay at my parents, while I run it up there. I tell him what she's been saying and he finds it a little weird too, but figures ya know, she's almost 3, she's figuring words and emotions out so whatever. I still don't like it, so when I get home I start talking to her about it. And asked her again why, and she finally says, daddy says dp can't cause only daddy does. And she can't love dp no more. And I ask why she can't love dp anymore and she says he's not daddy. I can't love dp no more, and keeps saying it. OH!!! I'm so pissed.
I haven't asked her dad about this, cause I don't even know what to say, or even if I should say anything to him. I keep trying to tell her that no, he's not your daddy, but neither is Uncle.... or Uncle.... or this person or that person, but they still love you and you can still love them. I just don't know what else to do. I feel so bad. If you could see the look in her face when she say's this..UGH!! She seems so sad by this news her daddy has told her, And I don't know how to fix it.
Dp has kids too, and this baby is his, and I just don't want this to be the start of dd feeling different or left out or unloved or ANYTHING like that.
She knows he is the boy's daddy and the new baby's daddy, and she knows who her daddy is, but now, its like she thinks he don't love her cause he is not *her* daddy. I feel so I don't even know right now. I mean, my ex has always known how I felt about gf/bf being around our daughter and he has always felt the same. The way I see it, is, I would rather my daughter feel loved and cared for by this women than her feel out of place and unloved by her. And I would rather her run when dd hurts herself or holds and comforts her when she cries rather than just stand there and be like *your kid is....* I would rather my daughter love her and veiw her as a friend and a mother figure rather than someone who hates her presence and doesn't want her around causing problem with my dd's relationship with her dad. I don't think it matters how many times someone says they love them or how much time they spend wiht them or how much money or anything, they will always KNOW who daddy and mommy are and it doesn't change that. A kids mom could be a crack head and the kid is still gonna love their mom and be like this is my mom.
Off my soapbox stance on my views now, but ex has felt this way too, or so I thought. I just don't get it. Dd talks about his gf and her son all the time and it doesn't phase me, I ask her if she had fun and all that and never act all weird or like I don't want to hear it, cause I do, I wanna hear that she had a great time over there.
Sorry so long and a VERY big ramble, but what do I do? Anything I can do?
Thanks for reading if you made it this far, and I hope I didn't lose anyone :LOL I'm just so lost right now.