(sorry this turned out so long!!)
I'm not really looking for advice, I know we've been doing our part, and there isn't much more we can do, but an ear would be nice right now!!
As most already know, SO and I have full custody of dss (age 9), during the summer we all got together and figured out a more stable schedule for biomom to see dss (including every other weekend's etc). The schedule comes out to her having him 12 days out of the month. (2 weekends, Fri-Sun, and a few off days throughout the week, from 3pm-8pm)
Her court ordered child support is $340 a month, but she's never paid that much. When she works it's $200 a month, and when she doesn't, it's between $40-80 a month.
Well, a month or so ago she got a job. She had to start cutting down her time with dss, would pick him up at school and drop him right off here, so would see him 5 mins instead of 5 hours etc...
So, we give her time, knowing that you don't get your first paycheck right away, and last week, figured she'd give $100. Well, she gives us $40.
SO was ANGRY... VERY ANGRY over this...
He calms down and calls her the next day, she tells him that *SHE* decided
that since she now has him more, and on weekends, she will be paying less because she needs the money to feed him.
UMMMMMMMMM, she needs $260 to feed him 12 or less days a month, but we only need $80 for the rest?!?!?! (alright, so it would more likely be her keeping $120 a month, but STILL!!!)
Now I need to add, she thinks this is all about food and feeding him. Well, we pay for ALL of his clothing, ALL of his entertainment, ALL health costs, ALL school costs, ALL after-school activities... We pay for the birthday party, and she either attends ours, or never even has her own for him... We pay EVERYTHING else!!
We don't mind, this is OUR child and we gladly do it, but it's frustrating that she thinks she shouldn't *have to* pay the COURT ORDERED child support because she now sees him 12 days a month... UNFRICKINREAL!!!
Anyway, SO calls her the next day to talk about it some more, and she tells him that her and her boyfriend talked it over and decided they could give us $30 extra.. *rolls eyes* His halloween costume cost that much... Seriously...
I'm just not sure I understand her thinking... How much does she think it costs to raise a kid?? Surely not $80 a month, right?? Or even $200 a month.... BAH!!
Can anyone else relate??
(I MUST also admit, she's better than my ex, who won't pay a single dime for DD. Even when we lived together, I had to BORROW money for groceries, which btw, he'd eat too... I had to pay it all back though