Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: England, easily locatable by Google
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Right- the background. Was married, we had two boys together, I threw him out with the help of a court, he met a woman with a daughter six months older than our oldest. Therefore, my ex is an almost-stepfather of one and father of two (theoretically, anyhow- yep??) I'm also remarried with another baby on the way some time this year.
Last night, I bumped into someone who used to be a good friend up until 7 years ago, when I was pregnant with my eldest: then of course, the lack of babysitters came between me and many hours spent in pubs, drinking alcohol and being a fan geek (my ex is a fan of a particular sci-fi series. So is the mate.) He was really confused that I'm the mother of two boys, because he remembers me being pregnant at the time and as a writer and a gay man, he's fascinated by the idea of pregnancy- you know, babies kicking beer mats off the top of a bump, the idea of sharing your body with another person and all the other stuff he's never likely to experience. Yet, in emails with my ex recently and in posts on forums online, my lovely darling ex has been specifically identifying himself as being the father of a 7yo daughter, therefore the friend assumed we'd had a girl. I did a little bit of stalking last night and I've found 20+ references to his daughter, the Doctor Who fan: not one to his 6yo son, who's also a DW fan. She ISN'T, technically, his daughter: and he complains that our sons call him Daddy and my husband Dad, though his stepdaughter-to-be has been calling him daddy for 3 years or more now.
Am I just being overly hormonal and pregnant and irrational, finding this offensive? I'm just so annoyed with him already, what with the lack of child support and lack of visiting the boys and all the rest of it: and now it feels like he's denying they even exist. (BTW, he always wanted a girl: I don't know if he's told his new partner this or not, but part of me wonders if this is why it hurts so much.)
Talk sense to me, please?
Helen mum to five and mistress of mess and mayhem, making merry and mischief til the sun goes down.