I miss my Step kids - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 5 Old 12-10-2005, 09:49 PM - Thread Starter
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I have never posted here before but I need to just things out. I really miss my step kids. They usually only visit every other weekend, birthdays, and some holidays. They were here for 3 weeks over the summer and we had a great time with the exception of a crazy beach trip that ended in sun burns and staying in a roach motel. (now we all laugh about it) Since August they'ev only been here a handful of times because we cannot afford gas to pick them up (they live over a 100 miles away)
Last year they were here for Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas. I made plans with them to decorate and do fun activites. This year they haven't been here. I have been waiting for them to come and I haven't heard if they are going to be here for Christmas or not. My Step Daughter loves to help me decorating. Its something we bond over. My Step Son, is a pain that I actaully miss. So far the whole Christmas season has been dull without them here. My decorations are in a box, and I had to force myself to make cookies for a cookie exchange. Last year we baked about 8 dozen cookie. It was the first year I'd ever tried to make Christmas cookies.
In addition to not being able to continue with traditions I am trying to start, I don't even know what they want from Santa. Last year we had a letter writing session, and we all got in teh car for a visit with Santa. I found out what they wanted for Christmas and had a whole lot of fun playing santa too.
I know if I feel this way my DF feels a thousand times worse.

Thanks for listening.

I really need to get that out.
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#2 of 5 Old 12-11-2005, 12:30 AM
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I know how you feel. I miss my boyfriend's daughter. She is 12 and lives with her mom a plane ride away. She is here for 7 weeks in the summer, a weekend in Oct, some thanksgivings, Christmas, and March spring break. It is never enough time.
I love to sew with her, but there is never enough time to finish a project.

When I first met her I never imagined that someday I'd be crying when she left, I used to cry when she was going to come because everything got so confusing.

I know what you mean about the holidays being dull without them. When she is here over the summer for so long (not so long, really) everything seems to have so much more of a purpose. Then she leaves and I just feel like 'what do we do now?'.

And if I miss her like this, I can't imagine what he feels like.

I hope your step kids are able to visit soon. Isn't it lovely and exquisite and painful to love someone else's kids so?
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#3 of 5 Old 12-11-2005, 10:42 PM
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I know JUST how you feel. I miss my dsd. We haven't seen her since the last summer and that was only 3 weeks as her mother cut it short. She had to be in a wedding? Well whatever. My dsd is 1000 miles away and plane tix are expensive. She's getting sooo big so fast!
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#4 of 5 Old 12-12-2005, 10:24 AM
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Awww I'm so sorry... That must be rough. I'm lucky enough to see my step-kids every other day during the week and every other weekend but I can not imagine not seeing them that much... it would break my heart. I hate how unfair the visitation can be.... I just wish so many bio-moms would wake up and realize that these kids need their fathers more then once a month or whatever. I can't imagine taking my little boy's father away from him if we ever got divorced. Not seeing his father regularly would break his heart... huge hugs.... I wish there was more I could do for all those children and families that just don't see each other enough. Very sad.

Jeri, Natural lovin' Mama to Elijah (9.29.03), Eden (10.2.06), and a little one lost along the way (1/12)., Step-monster to Shelby (18) and Stephen (16). Celebrating 12 years together with my soul-mate, Eric. Hoping for a rainbow1284.gif someday! 
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#5 of 5 Old 12-12-2005, 10:28 AM
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I miss mine terribly. My stbxH left almost three years ago, after putting them on a plane for a Christmas visit to their mother... and laughing at me for crying as the plane taxied away - saying, "They'll be back in 10 days!".
He left four days later and I've only seen them once since then (their mother brought them to visit summer 2003).
I show my almost 3 yr old son pictures of his "other" brothers and his sister, but it isn't the same. My older son (from a previous marriage) misses them too...
I talk to their mother on the phone regularly, but the kids don't do the phone well... and it almost hurts more after talking to them.
This time of year really drives it home.
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