Step-son's decision - Mothering Forums

Forum Jump: 
 
Thread Tools
Old 04-04-2006, 03:39 AM - Thread Starter
 
anitacj2004's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 18
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Hi!I have a huge problem.I am a step-mother to my husbands son.He is going to graduate from H.S in May.And has decided to join the Navy.If that's not bad enough,he is ADHD,loves to blow things up,has authority issues,and has a terrrible temper.Plus he is what you would call a "know-it-all".
On top of that my husband is having a hard time letting go of his "adult son".He is more moody than a woman on PMS.If that 's possible.One minute he's o.k and the next he's soooo depressed and says his kids don't love him.Etc,etc,etc.I'm not so afraid for my husband .But I'm concerned over his son.God help the Navy is all I can say.
I just can't picture him obeying any Naval officer.HE will try to tell them how to do things better.And if he gets mad enough he blows up.I just can't see him making it in the Navy.But he got himself in this mess.I told my husband,I'm staying out of this.BUt he says I'm in it anyway.
Any advice?
anitacj2004 is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
Old 04-04-2006, 10:44 AM
 
djs_girl517's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Posts: 1,184
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
My DH and I are both former Navy. Sounds like that's exactly what the he needs. You may think he'll be telling off superiors, and he may even think that at the moment. But you'd be incredibly surprised how fast they're able to make an adult out of you.
djs_girl517 is offline  
Old 04-04-2006, 02:22 PM
 
mamawanabe's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: lorrie in Chicago
Posts: 1,824
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)
I think the navy will be fine, LOL. Probably 75% of their recruites are hot-headed 18 year olds with authority issues. Boot camp is designed to break people. He'll walk out of book camp exactly the kind of automon the Navy wants/needs.
mamawanabe is offline  
Old 04-04-2006, 02:42 PM
 
djs_girl517's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Posts: 1,184
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by mamawanabe
He'll walk out of book camp exactly the kind of automon the Navy wants/needs.
Nice.
djs_girl517 is offline  
Old 04-04-2006, 02:54 PM
 
mamawanabe's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: lorrie in Chicago
Posts: 1,824
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by djs_girl517
Nice.
Misplaced offence here. My dh was in the airforce for 8 years, his brother is a career navy enlistman.

When I ask dh why the need to berate and yell etc at recuites in boot camp and to teach them to march in unison (something not done on any battlefield) and to shave their heads, my dh explained that it was to take away the illusion of individualism. To get them to reflexivly obey authorities (which they need to do in battle), to teach them to be a cog in a machine larger then themselves. He doesn't think it a bad thing.
mamawanabe is offline  
Old 04-04-2006, 03:01 PM
 
djs_girl517's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Posts: 1,184
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Okay. I apologize then. I agree that the illusion of individuality needs to go away. An army/navy of independent thinkers would be disastrous all the way around. I guess I just took exception to the word 'automon'.

But I wholeheartedly agree that RDC's are very skilled in breaking recruits down and building them back up the way the Navy needs them to be.
djs_girl517 is offline  
Old 04-04-2006, 03:20 PM
 
It's me!'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 132
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Listen, my brother went into the Army out of HS and I was worried too. He wasn't TERRIBLE, but he DID have authority issues and was VERY stubborn and he loved to shoot stuff and all that. It helped him a lot. It doesn't matter what he thinks going in....they will put him in his place! LOL Now some of that can "wear off" after leaving, but my brother is definitly a better person now....He is much more respectful and values other people's time and just lots of stuff (and he is almost 30 now, so he has been out a long while). We also became closer during this time. He would write me letters while he was in Korea and he told me how much he respected me and how, although our decisions in life are different, he respects my decisions and that he loved me. He missed us (meaning my Mom too, that's about it for our family) and it brought us a lot closer together emotionally even though we are still night and day different in a LOT of ways.
It's me! is offline  
Old 04-04-2006, 03:39 PM
 
broodymama's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Watching the rain
Posts: 7,286
Mentioned: 2 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 4 Post(s)
Your DSS sounds a lot like how my DH was at 17. My DH also joined the Navy at 17, he knew he wasn't ready to go to college at the time. DH is now 31 years old, still in the Navy with a great career (though he never thought he would be a lifer), can retire in just over 6 years and thanks to his training (nuke) has some wonderful career opportunities when he gets out.

Not trying to sound like a recruiter here, just saying that, for DH, it worked out very well.

Chaotic uc.jpg homeschool.gif mama to 5 plus a bonus one on the way.  stork-suprise.gif

chicken3.gif

broodymama is offline  
Old 04-04-2006, 03:54 PM
 
dynamicdoula's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Kitsap County, WA
Posts: 2,278
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
So weird to see this thread on MDC...

I'm also going to agree with everything already posted!

Kristina in Kitsap County, WA
Doula, Student Midwife, Mama, Wife & More
http://redspiral.blogspot.com
dynamicdoula is offline  
Old 04-04-2006, 07:08 PM
 
It's me!'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 132
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by dynamicdoula
So weird to see this thread on MDC...
Yeah, I thought that too LOL
It's me! is offline  
Old 04-04-2006, 07:53 PM
 
MommyMine's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 663
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Are you really afraid that the military can't handle your skid? Becuase of course that isn't true. Or are you afraid for your skid's safety?
MommyMine is offline  
 
User Tag List

Thread Tools


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off