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Originally Posted by mothragirl
my stepmother was this way with me. before she came along with was just me and my sisters and my dad so we were his primary focus. changing that wasn't possible without a major upheaval of our family dynamic and we ended up very neglected by the end. i think children should come first no matter what. you're the adult, you can handle things differently.
Originally Posted by MommyMine
In the meantime I suggest disengaging from any discipline of her at all. Let him deal with her becuase if she won't obay you and he wont' back you then you can't discipline her anyways so all I am really saying is admit you are beat and drop that rope. Now this means making stuff be his job so he either has to figure out how to get her to obay you OR get himself to do the job. So say if my dh won't support my work with my skids I won't be alone with them. I simply wont' take responsibilty to watch kids who won't accept my authority as the adult in the home. I have boundaries for what is acceptable in my home such as clean and so forth and I insist my dh make it so- I don't care if he or his kids clean up but it must be cleaned and I expect him to mkae sure it is. I go to him to discuss the issues. I let him deicde how to fix it.
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