Step mom to 3 teen boys, help needed - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 4 Old 07-29-2006, 04:01 PM - Thread Starter
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I am hoping that someone here might be able to help me out and give me some ideas on how to handle this situation before it goes way out of proportion..........

I have three teen step sons.....I married their father three years ago and even with our ups and downs, I have always managed to handle all that was thrown at me......I have two teen daughters of my own......
Lately, my step sons have been defying me when asked and then told not to do something......they have taken things and then lyed about it......and have even gone so far as to threaten me........

I work out of my home and have had to leave clients to break up arguements and fist fights between the step sons and I feel like this is getting way out of hand...........their father gives the impression of they are just boys and boys do this........

I really need some help, before I blow a fuse and maybe make a choice I don't think I want to make........

Thank you
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#2 of 4 Old 07-29-2006, 04:06 PM
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I don't have any advice, but didn't want to read without posting.

Good luck, and welcome to MDC!
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#3 of 4 Old 07-29-2006, 07:37 PM
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I dont think boys or girls should be threatening, defying and lying. I have 3 teenage step sons - have been married to their father almost 2 yrs and I will say it has been a huge adjustment for me. I have a 10 yr old daughter of my own and we just were not used to the wrestling and hitting and argueing and loudness and spitting, man you name it. Some of it I have to say is boys will be boys. But character defining things like lying, threatening, disobeying authority somehow someway you need to try and break thru to your husband that this is a big deal for you and for them as they grow into adulthood and become men. I do recommend staying the long haul and persevering thru this. have you and your husband considered counseling to better communicate. It can be hard to get thru to a parent about their child whom they adore. I know my husband says i am stubborn as can be about my daughter and I can gaurantee you he is stubborn about his boys.
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#4 of 4 Old 07-30-2006, 03:21 AM
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I don't have stepkids but thought I'd make sure to point out the obvious, teenage boys and girls can really act out with lots of anger when a new parent arrives on the scene (even if this seems belated).

I agree with PP that I'm sure if you and dh can spend time discussing this privately with somekind of helpful third party it may help you both. Always remember you can't control other people's behavior but you can control your own. Figure out what will keep you in a good place emotionally so you have some solid ground while working thru this.

Welcome to MDC, hang in there and keep us updated
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