Just wanted to post a quick note about the term "visitation". I didn't mean to offend anyone. That is what 2 people do when they divorce, the work out a visitation schedule. I didn't mean to make it sound like my DSS is less important or anything like that. He lives with his mom and "visits" us. That's not the way we want it, but that's how it is. The "visitation" agreement was made between DH and DSS's mom 13 years ago and hasn't changed. DSS's mom won't agree on paper to increased "time" because it would decrease her child support. My DH is a great dad and very involved in his sons life. He would really like to see him more than every other weekend and one afternoon per week and he doesn't see that time as a lunch date or anything like that.