Finding out the sex? - Mothering Forums

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Old 08-04-2005, 12:29 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Will you try to find out? Have you found out in previous pregnancies? If you have done it both ways, which do you prefer? Dh and I are already in negotiations about this. We found out with the first, but I would really like to be surprised this time since it will most likely be our last. Dh is insistent that we should find out, I need to convince him otherwise or schedule my US for when he can't be there.
Lydia
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Old 08-04-2005, 01:57 AM
 
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Hi txgal, my vote is to wait. I had such a blast guessing whether the baby would be a boy or girl. It was a great topic of conversation with family. And I really liked finding out that I had a boy when he was born. It just went along with the whole mystery of birth.

I'm kind of generalizing, but I think men pretty much always want to find out. But I think they can be convinced too.

Since we're on this topic, I hope you don't mind me adding this link:

http://www.babygenderprediction.com/...es/index.phtml

I'm actually going back and forth between March and April due date clubs (I'm March 26, but ds was over 10 days late), and I posted this in March. It's a fun link where you answer questions based on old wive's tales, and at the end, they calculate the likelihood of you having a girl or boy in percentages. You can keep checking back as you progress. Now what would be the fun if you already know!
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Old 08-04-2005, 02:46 AM
 
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We found out with both kids - and will find out with this one too. I am too impatient - I could never wait knowing that I *could* know. We really talked about not finding out with #2 - but once I was there I had to know.

This time, we are finding out for a purely practical reason - we have no baby stuff left and will not have a shower (since this is #3) so I need to know who I am buying for. I love to shop clearance racks, thrift shops and yard sales - so knowing boy or girl is a big help to me.

We also know that 2 of our kids will be sharing rooms. The older two will share while the baby is young - but then we'll be pairing them up by gender. DS (#2) will need a bed soon - and if we have a boy we'll get him bunks right away. If it's a girl - we'll have to think about DD (#1) furniture a little more.

I think it's reallyhard to have the u/s and NOT find out. I always say it's a surprise no matter when you find out - you just need to know when you're ready for the surprise
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Old 08-04-2005, 04:27 AM
 
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We found out with DS but we are going to wait this time
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Old 08-04-2005, 08:42 AM
 
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hoping to wait but who knows!!
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Old 08-04-2005, 08:43 AM
 
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We found out at 19 weeks with our dd. Finding out we were having a daughter was one of the best days in my life : We are undecided about finding out this time. If we end up getting an u/s it would so hard not to find out! Not sure I can do that! On the other hand, I was always paranoid that dd was going to be a boy and that the tech was wrong :LOL Right now I'm not too worried about whether or not we find out, just worrying about this baby sticking!

~Rebecca~
mama to a sweet girl , & 4 silly boys

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Old 08-04-2005, 10:36 AM
 
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Though DH had always claimed that he would abosolutely have to find out the sex of our first baby - now that we actually are pregnant, he's decided that he can wait. Which is fine by me - I do think it will be fun hearing all the predictions from family and friends, etc. Plus, I plan to use the little blue and pink outfits I take to the hospital as a tool to try to help me through labor. Not sure if it will really work - but I definitely think it would help you refocus during a tough point in labor if you can look up and see two little outfits hanging on the wall. Help you remember what your working for!
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Old 08-04-2005, 11:31 AM
 
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We didn't find out for DD and though I'd like to find out w/ this pregnancy, my DH made a good point. He said:
"I love the surprise. How many times in your life are you able to have a surprise like that?"
Point taken. And I agree.
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Old 08-04-2005, 01:03 PM
 
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I found out with my boys and havent decided if I will this time or not. SInce I will most likely have to schedule a c-sec. I will already know the day and time s/he will be here, it would be fun to have some kind of surprise. I am assuming its gonna be a boy since I already have 2, but waiting gives me a few more months of thinking well it might be a girl
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Old 08-04-2005, 02:04 PM
 
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DH & I are in negotiations right now, too. He wants to find out, I don't. I love surprises, and my personal feeling is that finding out the gender beforehand is like opening your Christmas presents early (which I never did). I love the suspense, the anticipation, the dreaming.

However, I feel myself swaying on my decision. Just going out to look for a simple picture frame has been a lesson in how gender-obsessed our society is. EVERYTHING is either pink or blue! There are very few gender-neutral items out there, and the things that are just don't look as cute as the ones that are pink or blue, in my personal opinion. It would be nice not to have to buy everything in yellow or green (not my favorite colors). Also, I have a feeling DH & I are going to have a difficult time agreeing on names (he likes more common ones, I like more unique ones), so it would definitely be nice to cut down on the arguing time by half.

Argh, at the rate we're going, it might come down to something like flipping a coin!
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Old 08-04-2005, 02:33 PM
 
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We didn't find out with our first - I thought it was sooooo odd that you would know something like that before the baby's birth. I remember that while I was in labor my friend - who was 4 months behind me in her pregnancy - called to say she just found out the sex of the baby. And all I could think was "how on earth could she know before we do?" It just seemed like the weirdest thing.

With our second baby we did find out. Of course I felt like the worlds biggest hypocrit because of it but I had so completely (from the start) identified with her as a girl (I was already calling her by her name and everything) that I guess I kind of panicked and thought I'd better be prepared in case she's not (she was!)

This is our final pregnancy and I won't be finding out. I'm actually not going to have any ultrasound exposure this time around - I believe strongly that it damaged my first dd (ask me if you want more info on that) - so for sure I won't be finding out. But even if I were going to do an ultrasound I'd opt not to know. The surprise is so nice and how many times in your life do you really get such a nice surprise? So that's how we're doing it.

Mama to four remarkable kiddos, all born at home.
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Old 08-04-2005, 09:55 PM
 
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We won't do an ultrasound unless it is indicated, so we'll find out when baby is born!
Trisha

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Old 08-05-2005, 11:35 AM
 
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i'll have to be monitored pretty closely by u/s and we are DEFINITELY finding out! we're in total agreement: we wanna know! after so long ttc, we just can't wait to find out more about this babe!

plus, dh is from china, so if we have subsequent kids there, (as was the plan), we won't have the option of finding out!

i can't believe i am really typing these words!!!

celeste terra, single wohm to twin toddler boys max and shoghi. bamboo village press
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Old 08-08-2005, 12:22 PM
 
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We did not find out with the first two and will not find out with this one. I LOVE the surprise of the announcement when the babe is born -- I wouldn't imagine doing it any other way.
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Old 08-08-2005, 01:05 PM
 
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I'm a fan of waiting to find out. With dd1 I thought that I would instantly want to know and instead whrn she was lifted up in my arms I brought her up tp my face I just wanted to look in her eyes. I kept saying "Oh baby, I love you!" I had to be reminded to look and see if she was a boy girl.
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Old 08-08-2005, 06:23 PM
 
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We're definitely waiting for the surprise, as we did for our first child. I have never experienced anything close to the magic of the morning DD was born. We can't wait to wait.

DH will announce the sex, and he will announce the pregnancy at 3 months. These are his special "duties".

Faith

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Old 08-10-2005, 01:24 AM
 
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With ds, we decided that if they could tell on the u/s, we wanted to know. If it was unclear, we wouldn't worry about it.
In the u/s, ds had his legs crossed against my spine with his cord b/w his legs. Couldn't see a THING! So we got to be surprised.
Same thing this time, if the baby wants to show the goods, cool, otherwise, we'll find out soon enough.
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Old 08-10-2005, 11:42 AM
 
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We didnt find out with dd and were pretty sure we wont with this one either. It was so much fun telling everyone after she was born. After she was born dh got to announce the sex it was great!!
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Old 08-11-2005, 11:19 PM
 
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We found out with dd. DH didn't want to, then said OK, and then was really glad that we did. I wanted to know all along, because I'm impatient and nosy.

So we will find out this time, too, if he/she is willing!
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