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#31 of 55 Old 03-06-2006, 03:02 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Mandy - I think I've seen swim skirts like that in the JCPenney catalog before, might want to check there? Sounds like a good idea to keep a teeny bit of modesty left in ya during labor - LOL, if there is such a thing. I know what you mean though, I'm just not a nekkid person at heart.

Must work on my to do list so I can update it like all these other ladies....ugh. Not enough time, money or energy.
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#32 of 55 Old 03-06-2006, 04:36 PM
 
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I have my list of things to get ready for birthing from my midwife to buy and put together. I also really want to change the boys' bedroom with ours!! YIKES! I am *EXCITED* to be nesting though, as I never do. I need some new diaper pants and MUST have a new diaper pail. There are plenty of other things I WANT, but don't hafta have... Like these: http://www.cottonbabies.com/index.php?cPath=98 AH but that's dreaming....

(((((HUGS))))) sandi
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#33 of 55 Old 03-06-2006, 04:42 PM
 
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Originally Posted by nighten
I would LOVE to be normal and not be a manic person, so I'm actually a little jealous of your perfectly apropros list. *hugs*
So cute! I've actually had some moments of nesting, so I have done *some* things...... But I do have a list of "If this, then send mom here...."
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#34 of 55 Old 03-06-2006, 04:46 PM
 
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If I happen to run across a swim skirt without the attached panty before then in the store, I'm gonna buy that so I'm not running around the house naked in labor...but it won't be clingy cotton in the birth pool either.

Ooooohhhhh, blessssss you!!!!! I am soooooo doing this! Target has some, if you're still looking.....
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#35 of 55 Old 03-06-2006, 09:47 PM
 
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Thanks ladies for the idea on where to look for the swim skrit! I appreciate it much! Hope to find one too!

Mandy

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#36 of 55 Old 03-08-2006, 01:17 PM
 
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I just packed a dark-colored pair of DH's button-fly boxers and a sports bra for when I'm in the tub at the birth center, as am not having a water birth, just for some modesty while using tub during transition, etc.

Anyway, some men's swim trunks or soccer shorts or something might work in a pinch if you can't find the skirt?

SAHM to Guinevere (04/05/06) and Eowyn (02/13/09)
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#37 of 55 Old 03-08-2006, 01:26 PM
 
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- Put together packet for GPs (directions, "requests", etc)
- MW and doula gifts (probably going to sew sachets and fill them with lavender)
- Finish sewing baby's quilt and related items
- Buy DD gift from baby
- Help DD pick out a gift to the baby from her
- Put together bag to take to birth center (my stuff, baby clothes, etc)
- Bring up baby stuff (swing, infant seat, etc)
- Knit several nb baby caps
- Make some food to freeze for first two weeks

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#38 of 55 Old 03-08-2006, 01:48 PM
 
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I thought this thread was scaring me last week, so I didn't look for a while, but now I look again and you all are talking about gifts for the midwife & doula?! Really, do you think $1000 is not enough of a gift for a professional I'm hiring? I mean it's different if she's a friend of yours, but if she's just someone you're hiring to attend your birth isn't her fee enough?

In response to this thread (and to my first peek at the vax boards yesterday, oy) here is my to-do list:

- Stay calm and relaxed.

And here is my real list:
prepare apt for painting (put stuff into boxes, get boxes)
after painting, put everything back, hang art, curtains, tv
figure out where exactly to enter hospital when time comes
figure out car for getting to hospital when time comes
choose pediatrician
pick a girl's name
discuss post-birth procedures with MW
get (shower next week) and wash going-home outfit for baby
get (") co-sleeper, nursing pillow, diapers & baby toiletries
buy or raid my mom's basement for dresser/changing table
Wills, living wills, life insurance for me
Research and open college savings account (dh just came up with this one this morning!)
orient family members to natural birth process, deal w/their reactions
get all personal stuff off my computer and out of my desk at work
pack bag

I think there was more, but I'm blanking. I am calm and relaxed...I am calm and relaxed...
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#39 of 55 Old 03-08-2006, 02:18 PM
 
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arismommy, thanks for that link for midwife gifts! Our usual gift is a trip to a really wonderful, top-of-the-line chocolate shop. We choose assorted truffles and goodies and coffee.

(((((HUGS))))) sandi
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#40 of 55 Old 03-08-2006, 02:38 PM
 
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I'm kind of scared by the lists.

I'm just going to take it day by day and see what I can get done. I've had bad experience with overdoing it and then the baby gets tired too and I freak out about it. Also my husband's getting sick, so I don't want to catch what he has...

Breathe in, breathe out. Wax on, wax off.
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#41 of 55 Old 03-08-2006, 03:10 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Citykid
I thought this thread was scaring me last week, so I didn't look for a while, but now I look again and you all are talking about gifts for the midwife & doula?! Really, do you think $1000 is not enough of a gift for a professional I'm hiring? I mean it's different if she's a friend of yours, but if she's just someone you're hiring to attend your birth isn't her fee enough?
Ummm. I'm actually with you on this. My gift to my midwife is that I'm paying her. And she is quite happy with that considering lots of her clients are very poor Amish and Mennonites that barter or just give her what they can. I've also heard from a different midwife that the best gift you can give them is a recommendation (or sending them another client). And I've done that already too.

So, I'm good to go!

Mandy

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#42 of 55 Old 03-08-2006, 06:16 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Citykid
I thought this thread was scaring me last week, so I didn't look for a while, but now I look again and you all are talking about gifts for the midwife & doula?! Really, do you think $1000 is not enough of a gift for a professional I'm hiring? I mean it's different if she's a friend of yours, but if she's just someone you're hiring to attend your birth isn't her fee enough?
My m/w is an old friend of mine and absolutely precious -- we went to high school together 20 years ago -- and my doula is a dear friend, so I have no issues with giving each a gift in appreciation and acknowledgement of their support and how much they've meant to me and DH on this journey.

But honestly, I think I would do something regardless of my personal relationship with them outside of being pg, because of their incredibly supportive roles in this pregnancy and (presumably) the birth of my child. It's not like I just met these people this week. If that were the case, then a card after the fact would suffice, absolutely.

And in our case, it's the insurance company that's paying the m/w, not us directly, and they aren't big gifts -- just little thank yous. Sort of like what you'd send your child's favorite teacher for Christmas or at the end of the school year.

Maybe it's a Southern thing? I'd feel guilty if I didn't do something for the m/w and doula. I sent the pediatrician a Thank You card after our interview with her (because she was so receptive and we really like her), and I'm also bringing fudge or cookies with us to the birth center for the nurses....if I have the energy to bake in early labor that is. But heck, we give the postal carrier a box of chocolates every Christmas, so the notion of a thank you gift for a midwife is not uncommon here. But it might just be a Southern thing. *grins*

Regardless, I think Thank You cards if you were pleased with the m/w and doula services after the birth is absolutely fine. It's what you feel is appropriate. If you're spending $1000 on their services then you certainly don't have to spend more money on a gift -- but I do think a card is a nice touch if you are pleased with their services.

But the bottom line is there are plenty of things to do and to stress over between now and when the baby comes. If the notion of shopping for a thank you gift is causing you stress, then don't worry about it. Pick up a pack of thank you cards, address some ahead of time and call it a day so you don't have to go out to the store looking for a card with a newborn later.

SAHM to Guinevere (04/05/06) and Eowyn (02/13/09)
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#43 of 55 Old 03-08-2006, 07:12 PM
 
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Wow, I'm really concerned now. Giving them gifts had never crossed my mind. I DID actually just meet my doula a few weeks ago, and my MWs are a group practice so I've only seen each of them once or twice. Also it's going to be a hospital birth, so maybe that's less...something. The MWs are covered by insurance and the doula I'm paying $1000. I'm not being stingy and would totally be willing to spend the $, but it just doesn't seem appropriate in my case? Am I wrong? I will ask my Bradley teacher tonight.
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#44 of 55 Old 03-08-2006, 07:56 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Citykid
Wow, I'm really concerned now. Giving them gifts had never crossed my mind. I DID actually just meet my doula a few weeks ago, and my MWs are a group practice so I've only seen each of them once or twice. Also it's going to be a hospital birth, so maybe that's less...something. The MWs are covered by insurance and the doula I'm paying $1000. I'm not being stingy and would totally be willing to spend the $, but it just doesn't seem appropriate in my case? Am I wrong? I will ask my Bradley teacher tonight.
I would think in your case, thank you card(s) would be totally fine, if you feel the need to go above and beyond simply verbally thanking them at the time.

My reasoning (and my situation is different from yours, although I'm going to a birth center or hospital, but my m/w plans to come to my house to check me first -- she lives nearby and the birth center is about 45 mins away) is the gifts are not just for *one* service -- it's for ongoing support that both the m/w and doula (especially the m/w -- and her little gift is nicer than the doula's little gift -- plus we're paying the doula around between $200 and $300 depending upon time) have had in my pregnancy. If I were seeing whomever at the practice was available (like in your case) then I wouldn't get a gift -- just a card. And then I'd likely send it to the practice, rather than one midwife in particular. Does that make sense?

I don't mean to add stress to anyone. Really, I think a card after the fact would be plenty.

(As an aside, your doula's charging $1000? Dang!)

SAHM to Guinevere (04/05/06) and Eowyn (02/13/09)
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#45 of 55 Old 03-08-2006, 11:22 PM
 
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I'm a total slacker--I don't have a list either (great minds think alike, Meg? ). If I really think about it, there *are* some things I'd like to get done: buy a booster seat for T (to free up his seat for Z to free up *his* seat for the baby). Wash the baby clothes (already sorted and put away in the dresser... I tend to not wash them till the very, very end). Buy some new nursing bras. Get some plaster strips for a belly cast. Get my hair trimmed. Get some stuff for post partum care. Cook some stuff for the freezer. But I feel pretty relaxed about the whole thing... We have all the stuff (except the booster seat), and we know what we're doing...
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#46 of 55 Old 03-08-2006, 11:59 PM
 
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my doula is my best friend and is charging me nothing!! so in this case i have gotten her a doula t-shirt, doula bag, and doula bumper sticker. she is just starting out and will be so excited to have these things to help promote her services. BUT i will not be getting my midwife anything. they are wonderful but i think my thanks is enough. i can only imagin all the junk they get from clients like mugs, pens, things they dont need.

Angela: Catholic Homeschooling Mom to Sierra(11/00), twins Addison & Kendall(3/03), Jack(4/06), Brielle (7/08), Levi (2/2011); due with#7 (9/13). Birthed every witch way.....hospital. C section. VbAC. Unassisted water birth (hypno/painless). Assisted waterbirth to an almost 10lber! (Not painless!)
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#47 of 55 Old 03-09-2006, 12:26 AM
 
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Oh KK.... why'd ya have to go and mention getting your hair trimmed? I totally forgot about that! I'm already looking ... the thought of going w/o a trim for months (and months...) after the baby is born is almost too much to bear.

Gee, maybe I better make a list. This thread is making me realize just how much I have to do. But then again.... we have nb dipes and clothes (worst case scenario, DH can throw them in the wash when I go into labor) and my boobs are ready to go, so everything else is sort of secondary, right?
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#48 of 55 Old 03-09-2006, 12:33 PM
 
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Sorry to continue to hijack - but yes, doulas with any experience in NYC charge $1600-$2000. Ours is giving us a break off her regular fee because basically she's a wonderful person. We interviewed a few doulas at the "low end" - $600 - they had fewer than 10 births under their belt (one only had 3), were in their early 20s and clearly just doing this while they figure out what they really want to do with their lives.
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#49 of 55 Old 03-09-2006, 01:22 PM
 
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Got my haircut and it wasn't even on the list

As far as gifts/cards I will definately be making cards for both my MW and doula. I plan to get my doula a small gift as I have not seen her much during my pregnancy and she is costing us the equivalent of $1000 ( I guess London UK is like NYC ) My MW has been AMAZING and I just don't know what I would have done without her, she will definately be getting a great gift
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#50 of 55 Old 03-09-2006, 01:57 PM
 
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Meg, just between you and me, I will probably also be getting my eyelashes dyed (albeit with a vegetable dye) at the same time. Because yes, the next haircut will be a loooong time later... And yes, I feel pretty schlumpy for the first month or 2 post partum.

I'm not getting my hair cut *now*... I'm waiting till as close to the birth as possible. I'm thinking ~40 wks...

Oh yeah, I should dig out the contact info of the *amazing* post partum massage therapist who does home visits who totally fixed my back last time... I get the feeling that my priorities are a little different from some of y'all (Notice how these things are not about the *baby*.)

Dh is ordering the booster seat, so in my mind we're "done" and ready. Anything else we get done is just extra.
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#51 of 55 Old 03-09-2006, 02:01 PM
 
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I've never bought my mw a gift. But I'm the type of person who never gets around to sending out thank you cards, etc. Plus at $4500 do I really need to buy a gift? Especially when she didn't even make the birth last time and probably won't this time and didn't offer any discount? I would be happy, however, to provide any service she needed (like website update, photography (which I do), etc.) - and I've mentioned this in the past.

Haircut is high on my list. I better call today to see if I can get one. The only problem is that my stylist is on maternity leave! So I'll have to take my chances w/someone else. And now I remembered that I better get Easter stuff ready to go for the girls since we'll probably have our hands full once Easter gets here.

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#52 of 55 Old 03-09-2006, 04:44 PM
 
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Originally Posted by love_homebirthing
And now I remembered that I better get Easter stuff ready to go for the girls since we'll probably have our hands full once Easter gets here.

I tried. But somehow, I couldnt motivate to GET anything. I was too scared to bring candy into the house.... I think that one's getting put on the "mom, can you please...." list..... along with painting her room to get ready for the move!
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#53 of 55 Old 03-09-2006, 09:42 PM
 
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I picked up the last few needed NB items today (a few teeny tiny NB hats and some non-footed 0-3 pants) which I'm about to throw in the wash. Besides that I'm just waiting a pair of NB longies, a NB wool cover and snappis/pins in the mail. The wool stuff I'm waiting on as well as the wool soakers I need to finish knitting (will be done by the end of the weekend hopefully) all will need to be lanolized though. The rest of the clothes/diapers are washed and put away, my house is reasonably clean, the pantry and freezer are decent enough that we should be fine pp, and the birth supplies are ready except for freezing some more maxi pads. I'll probably finalize everything on my list this weekend (minus actually finishing the hall bathroom...I don't care about that anymore) that must be done because I have this feeling the baby is coming soon! He just has to wait for it to be okay to have a HB (next Tues) and for me to get his wool stash dealt with then he can come anytime. I seriously could care less about the rest of the stuff on my list that I was so frantic about last week After a week and half of dd and then me being really sick with a cold then having the stomach flu last weekend my priorities have changed...

As for getting gifts for the MWs and doula, I definitely plan to figure something out pp. It may be some sort of baked good or something though since we are broke. The MWs have been absolutely wonderful to me (since its they are HB MWs I feel like I've gotten to know them really well) and my doula is also my friend who has been really supportive of me my whole pregnancy I may try to figure out something nice to do for my doula besides baked goods because she is so wonderful.

~Rebecca~
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#54 of 55 Old 03-10-2006, 12:15 PM
 
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Well, I think all I have left to do as far as stuff before the babe gets here, is get a gift for the midwives and for my doula (my very dear friend) and I figure I will just buy them a nice candle or something while I'm out today. I know they aren't picky...but I don't have alot of money at all to spend and don't feel like doing alot. I made my candles for my labor and they didn't turn out as well as I'd hoped, so I don't want to make their candles.

And to pass the time for the next 2 weeks or so, if I have to, I am going to try my hand at crocheting a baby blanket or something. Even a small one would probably take me the whole 2 weeks to make. hahaha Or I might just make the valance for the window and maybe the crib dust ruffle if I can find some cute, cheap fabric today.
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#55 of 55 Old 03-10-2006, 03:39 PM
 
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I am so tired I didn't have the energy to post my list here.

However, dh was off of work today so we went out and got the basic HB supplies that we needed, plus a button-up gown for me to labor in out of the tub (my version of a hospital gown!), the pads, witch hazels, TUCKS, and "granny underwear" b/c I don't want to worry about blood on my current underwear and wanted the crotch big enough to handle the pads.

I still need to get a couple of new nursing bras, new cover for my boppy pillow, 5 small BSWW covers, make sure I have enough towels and sheets, and make the final decision on a little fishy pool.

Also, when I get more energy I will probably clean the house and make a list of snacks/meals for dh to be able to refer to the baby is born... he can sort of handle that stuff but needs LOTS of guidance!

I already washed all the baby clothes and diapers, and made a sling. Oh, dh needs to get the carseat out of the basement. I can't really think what else beyond that!

An extrovert, married to my introverted dh since '01, mothering my girls C (2003) and G (2006).

 

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