mental block against baby coming? - Mothering Forums
April 2006 > mental block against baby coming?
aweynsayl's Avatar aweynsayl 04:24 PM 03-29-2006
Ok, someone mentioned this the other day, and it occured to me last night that I have this.

First of all, I was SO paranoid about baby following family tradition and coming at 36 weeks (meaning no birth center birth for me).... I got used to "thinking the baby IN"....

Second, I think I'm not wanting to be NOT pregnant anymore.... even though I *think* I'm sick and tired of it.... I think I will miss it so much.... it's such an amazing thing.... someone said something about having baby all to herself.... I do enjoy that!

Third, I've just been dumped with a rather large work project, and I really think I feel like I need to see it thru (even though the person taking over for me really is competent-- at least there's ONE competent person on the team.... poor thing, she'll be the only one, but she's tough).... also, since I'm probably not going back because of the move, but all that is still up in the air enough that I darent utter a word until I'm positive........ maybe I feel I'm kind of hanging in the air on that one?

Fourth, there are some things we havent gotten yet..... nothing huge, but it would be nice to have diaper pails and pins.

Fifth..... I *was* waiting for my cousin to get back to town.... well, she's back.... but my other cousin LEAVES on Monday.... that gives us THIS WEEKEND.... and maybe I feel that's too much preasure?

Sixth, I really want Baby to come when Baby Is Ready, so I'm not really doing anything to push things......

I dunno.... I'm just feeling like maybe I'm keeping this from happening..... anyone else?

(I'm 39 weeks, 1 day)


mamanurse's Avatar mamanurse 04:27 PM 03-29-2006
I'm not part of your DDC, but I thought my experience would help you relax a little about when baby will come. I was in nursing school when pregnant with dd. I was due two days after finals and was hoping she would stay in through finals. Mentally, I was trying to keep her in. HOwever, dd had other plans and came out when SHE was ready at 37 1/2 weeks. I think stress can add to early/late delivery, but ultimately baby will decide when it's time to make their grand appearance.
adinal's Avatar adinal 06:57 PM 03-29-2006
I wonder about this too.

I am enjoying being pregnant. Especially after three, almost 4, years of trying. (It would have been four years as of the end of this week.) I am enjoying this transition. Plus, the whole actually having a baby thing, is a little freaky! I have been ready to have a baby for years, I love babies. But now that I am getting close I am of course wondering how I will be with MY baby.

I know that the baby's room not being done, and not having a place to set up the birth tub is also making me not want her to come yet. Which is okay for now - I am only 36w 6d...so I have until tomorrow before I can even birth at home, which I am sure I will make.

When I think about it, I get nothing but a very odd vague blankness after the end of this week. DHs birthday is Monday, and our wedding anniversary is the 19th - I can't really picture what things will be like then.

Sort of weird...but I think it is because I am not really making plans at this point. I have work, but that is about it. My back went out over the weekend, and I have been chilling for the most part...and today I feel like doing stuff in the baby's room. The last of the "stuff" is arriving on Friday, so I can get it finished up. Then, I have a quilt for the day bed in there to work on. I am sure that having things I wanted to finish before the baby showed up is totally keeping me in the "stay pregnant" mindset. The last thing to arrive will be the car seat...which my SIL said she is going to get to us the first week of April.

Just getting the diaper pail and cosleeper yesterday made me feel better.

Anyway...just saying that I feel the same way.
Mel38's Avatar Mel38 07:16 PM 03-29-2006
Yes, me too! I had a bunch of things mentally holding me back - but not any more. I don't have any work issues any more and the house will be ready by this weekend (somewhat) AND my mom will be here... and yet I still feel like I am not mentally finished being pregnant. When people ask me when the baby is coming, the answer I feel most comfortable with is mid-April. It's just what I feel. Maybe it is also because I don't know if I'll ever BE pregnant again. I just don't want to wish it be over if it is truly my last time.
Sprucen's Avatar Sprucen 02:00 AM 03-30-2006
I was wondering about this, too. I'm 39 weeks today. DS came at 39 weeks 1 day, theoretically if this one is the same (as if they are ), labor would start tonight.

But I've done just about everything I can think of. I've got all the "stuff" I thought I still needed, diaper pail for our bedroom, clean floors, stocked pantry, etc. and there isn't anything else I can think of.

I mean how many times do I have to clean the bathroom before I can let go and "let" labor begin? It doesn't help that I have to keep saying "no I don't want to be induced, period" every week that I see my ob. I don't want to have to get into some giant argument with him at week 41 about letting me go another week.

So, "stuff and prep" wise I've got it all done, even though, sure I could add more, like, lets wait until the weekend, another paycheck would make finances have a better cushion than they have now, or I could come up with other things.

And yet I know I am holding back because, well, having a newborn to take care of, is reeeeeeeally hard and draining, and I have no idea how it'll go with ds, so that's scary. But I also keep thinking, babies don't care, they come when THEY are ready. Arrrgh!

Well, thanks for letting me get it out.
mariank's Avatar mariank 02:49 AM 03-30-2006
I was just thinking about this today. A friend with 4 kids advised me to slow down, breathe, sleep, take care, have sex, do good things, try to slow down especially at work... and said that she thought being too strung out with stress and things to do could make the baby come late, not early (which is what I was sort of thinking I guess, that stress could make her come early)... I'm trying hard to let things go and get past some work projects so that I can be easier on myself and let this baby feel like she can come when she is ready.
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