Need to vent (really long, sorry) - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 14 Old 05-06-2006, 11:21 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm feeling really frustrated this morning and just wanted to try to work through some of this.

So, we moved a few weeks ago. Move went relatively easily, but there's a bunch of stuff in the apartment that needs fixing. It took a long time to schedule the owner's maintenance person--he finally came yesterday. The following stuff needed to be fixed: kitchen faucet doesn't work properly and needed to be replaced; fridge motor needed to be oiled; oven burner is broken; electrical socket in bedroom didn't work. Although he knew the problems in advance, he didn't bring most of the supplies he needed, and the sink ended up needing a bigger repair, so all he was able to do was the electrical outlet. Now we'll have to schedule ANOTHER meeting, which means another day I'll have to waste at home rather than getting done what I need to get done, plus the worry that stuff won't actually be finished before baby arrives.

On top of this: our air conditioning conked out last night. It's 80 degrees and humid in DC and I'm in my last month of pregnancy. Building is *trying* to get someone to look at it, but it's a weekend...blah blah blah.

On top of this: my sister emailed me this morning. She was originally supposed to bring the car this weekend, then her plans changed and she was going to bring it down on Wednesday, with my mom. Fine. I was looking forward to seeing them, and we really want to install our carseat, be able to do our last minute errands, and not have to worry about birth center transportation. This morning she emails me to let me know that she can't come Wednesday after all, can dh go up to NYC next Sunday and pick up the car. He can't. He has to work. We've discussed with her several times that he's working every day between now and when the baby comes, and I'm not comfortable with him being away for 10+ hours when I'm 38 weeks pregnant, anyway. So now we don't know what to do. We have no other contingency plan in place, because we were expecting the car on Wednesday. We're going to need to get a bunch of rental cars for next week to do all the errands we had scheduled between Wednesday and Sunday, try to make plans with friends to borrow a car, if need be, and we still don't know when/if we can get my sister's car. Of course, it's so nice of her to lend it to us, that I don't feel I can get cranky with her about the situation.

What makes all of this so frustrating (besides the fact that it's coming on tops of weeks of fighting with the cable company, the phone company, and other services) is that I really feel I need to be spending this time dealing with my own internal stuff to prepare for the baby. I simply don't have the mental energy to deal with every single logistical thing that comes down the pike. I just want to be able to focus on my baby and my birth, and I'm getting afraid that all this crap in undermining my ability to be prepared and rested.

P.S. If you've made it this far, you're a saint!
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#2 of 14 Old 05-06-2006, 11:56 AM
 
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Originally Posted by NYCVeg
What makes all of this so frustrating (besides the fact that it's coming on tops of weeks of fighting with the cable company, the phone company, and other services) is that I really feel I need to be spending this time dealing with my own internal stuff to prepare for the baby. I simply don't have the mental energy to deal with every single logistical thing that comes down the pike. I just want to be able to focus on my baby and my birth, and I'm getting afraid that all this crap in undermining my ability to be prepared and rested.

P.S. If you've made it this far, you're a saint!
I totally understand! I felt the exact same way at 38 weeks, thankfully things smoothed out and now I'm just waiting for baby. Hang in there!
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#3 of 14 Old 05-06-2006, 12:02 PM
 
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Hang in there Amanda!

I'm so impressed you guys actually undertook a move at this stage in pregnancy! You've already accomplished a lot. Maybe an IL or extended family member can get the car down to you somehow? You guys seem to have a lot of support in that area.

Hope that venting helps...I know it always does help me
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#4 of 14 Old 05-06-2006, 12:15 PM
 
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That's a lot going on, big hugs to you Amanda. I know I'd be pretty overwhelmed as well. I hope that things can get resolved soon and you are able to focus your energy on getting ready to birth your babe.

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#5 of 14 Old 05-06-2006, 12:46 PM
 
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Ug Amanda! I feel pissed off just reading your post! I'm sure you've covered this already on your own but could your mom possibly drive the car down? Have you asked her advice on how to handle the change in plans? Would she possibly offer assistance in renting a car?

It seems like the apartment repair situation is really only a huge hassle, that will eventually be addressed, but dosen't need your energy wasted on it as you can't control it. Focus on what does need your energy, your little one and getting her here, the car.

We've had similar crappy apartment stuff to deal with this pregnancy and I'd really let it get to me. I too worried about not giving what I needed to the baby. My latest mindset when I dwell on things that bother/bothered me about it is to not give them my power.

Good luck and keep us posted on the car situation!
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#6 of 14 Old 05-06-2006, 12:59 PM
 
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I totally understand what you're going through. You're nesting and you had a plan and you just want to execute that plan! This probably doesn't help, but do know that even if NOTHING gets done (although I really, really hope the A/C gets fixed!!) you will get to the birthcenter somehow (even if it's in a cab!) and you will have your baby and eventually all this stuff will get worked out. After the baby comes, you'll care much less.

I've got most of my nesting done but there are things that I wish could get done, but I have to keep telling myself that none of this is essential to the baby.

So if you have your dipes (and it sounds like you do), some onesies and t-shirts, and a MW/LC to call on after the baby to help with nursing and all the questions you'll have, it will all work out. I promise you all your attention will go from your nest to your baby almost instantly.

Hang in there!

Kat - mama to Clara (9/29/03): & Iris (5/30/06)
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#7 of 14 Old 05-06-2006, 01:30 PM
 
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oops double post!
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#8 of 14 Old 05-06-2006, 02:22 PM
 
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I'm not doing well right now with even the smallest of plans going differently than I intended so I really feel for you. I hope things start going your way immediately!
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#9 of 14 Old 05-06-2006, 03:04 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Well, some stuff has gotten resolved.

The building maintenance guy came in and was able to fix our A/C (it was a very minor problem, but the kind of thing you wouldn't know about if you didn't know anything about air conditioning--which we don't). This was really nice of him, as he doesn't usually work on Saturdays, but I think he took pity on the poor sweaty pregnant lady.

My mom is going to drive my sister's car down a week from Monday. This is a little later than I had hoped (I'll be 38 weeks then), but it saves my dh from having to make a trip, so I can't really complain. We'll have to find some friends to be "on call" this week, just in case the little one decides to make a surprising early entrance. We'll also need four different zip cars between now and next Monday, to cover all the stuff we had planned to do with the car, but, again, that's mostly just an annoyance.

Thanks for all the support--it's amazing how overwhelming all the little stuff gets when you're this close to having a baby!
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#10 of 14 Old 05-06-2006, 04:11 PM
 
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YAY for some resolution!

Hope things continue to fall into place! After all, you're not going to have the baby until the end of the month, hopefully, right??

Sorry to hear that was so stressful for you, though... hope the unpacking is going well!

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#11 of 14 Old 05-06-2006, 05:21 PM
 
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Oh, I'm so glad things got somewhat resolved!!! Hugs to you!

Busy Mama to three beautiful girls and loving wife to my hubby
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#12 of 14 Old 05-06-2006, 06:13 PM
 
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I was really hating it for you in your first post-I am so glad things have begun to resolve themselves. I hope it all smooths out quickly-I know you don't need the stress right now.

mother, wife, sister, friend--step mom to one grown man and mommy to 3 boys-ages 19, 10 and 4
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#13 of 14 Old 05-06-2006, 08:42 PM
 
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Glad things are smoothing out... it's hard when things are falling apart!

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#14 of 14 Old 05-07-2006, 05:09 AM
 
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Oooh, how stressful. It's so frustrating when you are dependant on other people and they can't / won't make the effort you need them to make .

I'm glad to see some of the issues are resolving themselves. Stay calm, try to stay cool (though I have to say, I'm a little jealous, after a beautiful week we're having a craptastic weekend, weatherwise, and tomorrow the high will only be in the 50's... 80 degrees sounds nice, even with DC style humidity) and now that you have some of the logistical stuff worked out, spend as much time as you can focussing on baby!
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