Re-homing a dog? UPDATE: She found a new home! - Page 2 - Mothering Forums
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#31 of 43 Old 02-23-2011, 06:59 PM
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Thanks for all of these...very nice. 

 

The shelter is a kill shelter and they don't have a clause to return her.  Which is why I don't care to return her there.  I contacted a local humane society who is going to try and match me up with a family.  They have to pay a fee and I can choose to do a home check and then I get to decide if it's a good fit.  Someone is supposed to be calling me today.  So I'm excited to have some help in finding her a good home.  They felt she should find a home pretty quick since she's such a great dog.  Hopefully...


That is really great! I hope everything works out.

Just a suggestion when you do the home visit, ask open ended questions so people have to explain themselves and you can get a sense of the general philosophy they have toward owning a pet.

For example: how do you feel about using outdoor dog houses? How do you feel about dogs sleeping outdoors at night? Things that make them answer in more than just a yes or no. You don't want to lead them with a question like "Would you ever make your dog sleep outside at night?" Just from that a person can tell you are against it and will say whatever you want to hear. I sound paranoid only because it is weird the extent of lying people will do to get an animal. Very weird, my dad was a breeder for years (not a good one, he was in fact shut down by the state, it was really messed up as a child to see how he treated the dogs) and I have seen the bad side of dog ownership. You want your dog to go to a good home and you are working hard toward that which is awesome.

Ask for references from the people and especially ask if they have a vet lined up and then check that reference!

Goodluck

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#32 of 43 Old 02-24-2011, 01:19 AM
 
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Holly , I´ve read your post , very well , and I am not a rescue hardcore , I am an animal behavior specialist and I have a Masters degree in Wildlife Biology .

So , I have to inform you , that from a scientific standpoint , yes you are an animal , we all are , mamals and our official name is Homo Sapiens . We are (most of us anyway) very intelligent , but nevertheless animals .

And if you would have read my post , you would have seen that I said , an animal is not allowed to bite or be aggressive , but that´s not a black-and-white issue .

My very first cat was given up by their owners because she scratched their 2-year-old son after the parents let him play with her like she was a stuffed toy  and when she struck back in her desperation , they wanted to "get rid of the damn thing" . I am not a violent person , but the spanking that boy would have gotten from me , he would have never forgotten !

 

 



Sorry, but somebody who would hit their own kid doesn't deserve anybody's respect and, frankly, I don't even know what you're doing on a parenting board like this one. "A spanking he would never have forgotten?" I could NEVER take anybody's advice like yours seriously on the issue of pets or, indeed, anything else. You're clearly one of those animal shelter nutjobs who has no problem hitting (which is what spanking is, by the way) your kids but would take issue with anybody hitting a dog or a cat. You're not a violent person? You could've fooled me with your oh-so-loving parenting quote above. And no, animals are NOT the same as people. People like yourself, however, hold animals in higher esteem than people and my guess is you're a lot nicer to your pets than your kids. As for your Master's Degree, however did you manage to finish school and not realize that commas are not a full space after a word? In other words, commas come directly after words and not a full space after them. Same with exclamation points and periods. Do they really hand Master's Degrees out to people who don't even understand basic grammar and punctuation? Hilarious. Your posts have given me a good laugh this morning, so thank you for that! Animal shelter nutjobs, they're all the same....
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#33 of 43 Old 02-24-2011, 06:09 AM
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hmm I used to think my pets were my children.

Until I had a child, and now I just sigh when I hear people who don't have

children refer to their pets as their kids. I'm not mad at them but they really just don't

understand what they are saying because they have no reference point. 

Now I would shoot every single pet of mine without a thought if it meant protecting my DD's life.

That doesn't mean I would just shoot them if they were aggressive or something, I'm just using hyperbole 

to make a point. Anyway this thread isn't really about who has what degrees or who knows more about 

dogs and what shelter's are like etc. It's about this owner not knowing what to do with her own dog who she

rescued without much forethought. She is just trying to do the right thing for her whole family now.

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#34 of 43 Old 02-24-2011, 10:26 AM
 
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Quote:
 My very first cat was given up by their owners because she scratched their 2-year-old son after the parents let him play with her like she was a stuffed toy  and when she struck back in her desperation , they wanted to "get rid of the damn thing" . I am not a violent person , but the spanking that boy would have gotten from me , he would have never forgotten ! 

 

If you would not strike animals for normal behavior, why would you strike a toddler for normal behavior? If you want to blame someone, blame the parents. A normal toddler is impulsive and curious and has a very short attention span. The parents should have supervised and taught proper behavior until the toddler was older. Hitting children does not teach correct behavior any more than hitting trains dogs or cats.


Mother is the word for God on the hearts and lips of all little children--William Makepeace Thackeray
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#35 of 43 Old 02-24-2011, 03:05 PM - Thread Starter
 
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That is really great! I hope everything works out.

Just a suggestion when you do the home visit, ask open ended questions so people have to explain themselves and you can get a sense of the general philosophy they have toward owning a pet.

For example: how do you feel about using outdoor dog houses? How do you feel about dogs sleeping outdoors at night? Things that make them answer in more than just a yes or no. You don't want to lead them with a question like "Would you ever make your dog sleep outside at night?" Just from that a person can tell you are against it and will say whatever you want to hear. I sound paranoid only because it is weird the extent of lying people will do to get an animal. Very weird, my dad was a breeder for years (not a good one, he was in fact shut down by the state, it was really messed up as a child to see how he treated the dogs) and I have seen the bad side of dog ownership. You want your dog to go to a good home and you are working hard toward that which is awesome.

Ask for references from the people and especially ask if they have a vet lined up and then check that reference!

Goodluck



I have someone lined up to meet my dog tomorrow.  She wants to make sure she gets along with her current dog.  I like these questions.  Can you think of any more I should be prepared with?  I've never done an interview like this.

 

Thanks so much for your help!

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#36 of 43 Old 02-25-2011, 05:16 AM
 
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I would ask about plans for vet care.   Vet bills can be amazingly high, even for a healthy dog.  And if something goes wrong, it can cost a small fortune.

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#37 of 43 Old 02-25-2011, 05:22 AM
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Originally Posted by Mommyintraining2 View Post





I have someone lined up to meet my dog tomorrow.  She wants to make sure she gets along with her current dog.  I like these questions.  Can you think of any more I should be prepared with?  I've never done an interview like this.

 

Thanks so much for your help!


Sure! I am so glad you are being so thorough, a lot people (probably not here) just dump their dogs on someone and really horrible things can happen in that situation....Ok so since you asked if it were this is pretty much what I would be asking....

 

How long have you owned dogs?

Are you familiar with the border Collie breed specifically, what can you tell me about them (don't settle for oh they are hyper right?) If she doesn't know investigate more.

How do you feel about the use of choke collars and similar "training" devices?

Where does your current dog sleep? Where will this dog sleep if we decide it's a good fit for you?

Can you provide me with your current vet's name and phone number so I can call to check them as a reference? (It is incredibly important you follow through with the references, especially the vet

               one if only to make sure they regularly take their pets to the vet.

How would you react if my dog nipped you or your child?

How would you handle the situation if my dog and your dog seemed to get along fine at first but things changed a few weeks in? (this is always a real possibility no matter how well they get along

             in the beginning)

 

Ok the next ones are just to feel out how she is with her current dog. How do you deal with discipline with your current dog? What is the hardest issue you have had with your current dog?

Can you provide me with any other references?  

I can't really think of any more off the top of my head but I hope those are helpful.

I don't know where you are meeting the woman to see how the dogs get along but generally it is suggested a neutral place is best. I agree with this to an extent but I also think it is important to see how defensive the current dog will be with another dog in their home. Possibly start in a neutral place and then move the situation to the woman's home so you can feel out how her dog reacts to the situation. Also you really NEED to see what her home is like. You would be amazed how many hoarders of animals there are out there and they will appear totally normal unless you actually see their home! If she doesn't want you to see her home frankly this would be a HUGE red flag to me and I would probably end it there. It is totally reasonable for you to want to see where your dog might be living. I wouldn't take no for an answer and if she refused I'd walk away from the situation.

 

Finally, just be calm. You do not have to give this dog to this woman! You found someone quickly you can do it again. You have the right and responsibility to be extremely picky and thorough for the sake of the dog. Don't feel bad if she is nice but you just don't feel good about it. Thank her and tell her you have to think about it and then if you have to just send her an email or something if you can't call or whatever.  

I think you will be fine! It will be stressful and everyone will WANT it to work out but don't let that cloud your judgement. Scrutinize how this woman interacts with her own dog, weigh her answers carefully. Get references and CHECK THEM!! 

Goodluck I am sure you will be fine. Please let us know how everything goes!

 

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#38 of 43 Old 02-25-2011, 09:26 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Lauren,

 

You're AWESOME!  I especially appreciate the reminder to stay calm...that we WILL find a good home.  The questions to ask are very helpful.

 

A question I was asked when I visited a rescue shelter was, How do you feel about tying a dog?  At the time I had no idea if it was harmful or not.  The rescue lady told me it alters their personalities and can actually make them more aggressive.  So I'm certain to include that in my list of questions.

 

Thank you aain!

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#39 of 43 Old 02-25-2011, 10:21 AM
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Originally Posted by Mommyintraining2 View Post

Lauren,

 

You're AWESOME!  I especially appreciate the reminder to stay calm...that we WILL find a good home.  The questions to ask are very helpful.

 

A question I was asked when I visited a rescue shelter was, How do you feel about tying a dog?  At the time I had no idea if it was harmful or not.  The rescue lady told me it alters their personalities and can actually make them more aggressive.  So I'm certain to include that in my list of questions.

 

Thank you aain!



I'm glad you found the questions helpful. I agree that the tying a dog question is a good one. Check out if they have an outdoor kennel in the backyard too! If they do ask what they use it for and how often their dog is generally in it. Some people leave their dogs in those things all day (my aunt, cringe).

 

I have been there and it is really stressful. Ignore all the negativity about re-homing your dog, sometimes it really is the right thing to do! I posted before about how DH and I rehomed (to a family member) all 5 of our ferrets only 2 weeks after DD was born. They were our babies, we loved (and still do) so much. DH barely can talk about it even 2 years later nearly because it makes him so sad. It's not easy but it is so important to make sure they go to a good home even if it takes a little time. I hope your visit goes well with this woman!! If not, like I said before you found one person quickly it won't be hard to find another and another if you have to...You'll know when it is right. 

Goodluck, I am so interested to hear the outcome of the whole situation!

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#40 of 43 Old 03-03-2011, 03:01 PM
 
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I would also go by my gutt feeling , even if a house seems perfect and all , if you have a funny feeling about it , listen to it .

It would be a real shame , if after all the hard work you did , trying to find this dog a forever home , it would end up in a bad one .

And remember , you will be rewarded for all your work , by finding the perfect match , I am sure of it ! thumb.gif

I applaud you for trying , I think most people would just return the dog to the next-best shelter willing to take it and not think twice about it , so I am glad to see , that there are people out there who really care !

 

Oh , and just to clarify one of my posts , I would never hit my kids , everyone at my house is treated with the respect and dignity they deserve .

And Persephone , please stop grasping at straws , when you have no real arguments against my facts .

After all , this is an advice forum , not a spelling or grammar competition !

Mommyintraining needs our help and support , not somebody who dishes out at others over things , they cannot judge !


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#41 of 43 Old 03-06-2011, 08:38 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I wanted to update everyone and let you know we found a wonderful home for our dog.  We met the sweetest older gentleman who was looking for a companion to spoil.  It was perfect!  They hit it off great!  Our dog jumped right into his truck and started kissing him.  They were both smiling!

 

We ended up going through a volunteer who helps match up people and pets in the community.  This getleman and his wife had gone through them before and adopted a small dog.  The owner had done extensive checking on them and was very picky.  So I got lots of info about them and learned how they treated their pets.  I feel really good about how it worked out.

 

Thank you so much for the support here during this experience.  It was an emotional roller coaster and I got such great advice and encouragement.  You all made a difficult situation for me so much more enjoyable!

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#42 of 43 Old 03-06-2011, 09:33 AM
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that is very nice to hear...or read rather...Either way, it's great you found someone you are thrilled about!

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#43 of 43 Old 03-08-2011, 05:16 PM
 
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I read this thread much later than it was posted but have 2 bits to offer.

 

I think you did the right thing over all, and forget about the craigslist comments. I have a dog, (who is now dying, long story, wont get into) who at one time was aggressive to ALL DOGS and any child smaller than our daughter. He growled and tried to bite many children. He is a cattle dog and like your dog being a collie mix, needs lots of exercise but in their genes is this reaction to smaller creatures than it, they want to herd them. We did the training and learned this. But it is the use of their breeding that will sometimes interfere with the good home behaviors. Training did not work with his aggression, but he learned over 100 commands, and this helped us when we had small children come over. When the training did not work and it can be VERY expensive, I with a heavy heart made an ad on craiglist. I got the same responses even had my ad removed, I assume by the same person who emailed me negative comments. They told he that I was heartless, bad dog owner, deserved to be shot and everything you heard and more. There are people out there that like to make others feel miserable and want to feel like they can police others. They are the ones that need obedience classes. I am sure that you did all you can, and what gets you to that point leads you to your decision you made to re home the dog. I am glad you did it and think you made the right choice for your family. In the future, if you look for another dog, do lots of research in dog breeds. For homes with small children, you want to stay away from herding dogs typically, but there are bad fit dogs in all breeds

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